The Road Not Taken: Another Path
by asearcher
Summary: What would have happened if Sam never went to MIT and all the things that we know of his life from that point on didn't happen? This story travels literally down The Road Not Taken.
1. April 22, 1970

Disclaimer: I own nothing. I thank the creators and owners of these characters for allowing me to write fan fiction for my own and others enjoyment.

The Road Not Taken: Another Path

Chapter 1

April 22, 1970

_Why? It was such a waste!_ Sam remembered Tom's graduation from Annapolis a little less than a year ago. It was a beautiful day in Maryland and it had been thrilling to see all the Midshipmen throwing their caps in the air. He recalled how happy Tom had been when he'd been chosen for SEAL training. He'd actually been positive that his first command of a SEAL unit in Vietnam would turn out just fine.

But it didn't. Tom had gone off to that damned jungle and had gotten himself killed. Now they had buried his body. His mother and father, though proud that their son had served his country were heart broken. Sam had never seen them as despondent as they were the day the military car pulled up in front of the farmhouse. A tall Navy Officer in dress whites had exited the car and marched smartly up to the house, his eyes steeled to address the pain he knew his message would cause.

Tom had been killed instantly. There was at least some comfort in that.

The last time Sam and Tom had been together was the previous Thanksgiving. The family had one final meal before Tom had left, with a promise of many more to come when he returned from Vietnam. There would never be such meals again. Whenever they got together again, Tom's absence would be keenly felt.

Sam thought back to Tom's insistence that he go to MIT. Tom had spoken to Dr. LoNigro and had been told that Sam's mind only came around once in a generation, maybe only once in several generations. He'd convinced Tom that Sam needed to receive the opportunities that MIT would provide.

Sam had been excited by the possibilities. Dr. LoNigro was really cool and the ideas that they'd discussed had been mentally stimulating. Now, however, he had family obligations to consider. He couldn't leave his parents alone after losing Tom.

Today had been the hardest day that Sam had ever faced. The town of Elk Ridge had turned out in force, filling the church with men in black suits – most worn only for funerals, weddings, and other special occasions – and women in black dresses and hats with black netting over their faces.

His mother was wearing such a dress and she'd looked absolutely lost. His father, though trying valiantly to be strong for his wife, was struggling with his own pain. Katie was unsure of how to feel, having just turned 13 and never having faced the loss of one so close to her. She cried bitterly all of the time, angry and upset that Tommy would never walk through the door of the farmhouse again. Sam knew he was hurting badly with a pain he felt would never cease. Even though he and Tom were 6 years apart, he'd been quite happy being Tom's "Little Brother."

The eulogies had gone on, with many of Tom's friends and teachers speaking of the boy they knew and the man they'd not yet gotten a chance to know. At the gravesite, The American flag had covered Tom's casket. He had received military honors by the Navy and the protocols had been followed with precision. The flag had been removed, folded, and placed into his mother's hands. She'd looked at it sadly, wishing with all her heart that it was Tom she was holding and not the flag.

Now they were back at the house. The neighbors had brought food and they were gathered in small groups throughout the first floor, speaking in quiet tones and expressing their sorrow. While proud that many of Elk Ridge's finest young men had been willing to serve their country, they were also greatly saddened that some had paid the ultimate price in this service. They said as much to the Beckett family while offering their heartfelt condolences that Thomas had been one of the latter.

Sam pulled away from the gathering, from the overwhelming crush of these neighbors, seeking out a quiet space to think. He had a decision to make. He could continue down the path Tom had felt he should take. He could go to MIT and further explore that concept he'd formed years before about time and the ability to address it as nobody had before. Or he could go in another direction, putting his family's needs before his own.

He knew his Dad was struggling with the farm. When Tom had left in 1965 to go to college, Annapolis no less, his Dad had lost his greatest help. Sam, at age 11, had stepped up to the plate to take on Tom's tasks. However, while Tom was constitutionally and attitudinally focused on the farm work, Sam tended to focus on a broader canvas and this sometimes was detrimental to good farming practices. Sam knew that if he was going to help his Dad, he needed to take a more academic approach to farming.

He'd been offered a scholarship to Indiana State based on his basketball abilities. He'd considered taking a pre-veterinary course of study. Since Terre Haute was relatively close to Elk Ridge, he'd be close to the farm and his family. Then Tom had effectively changed that plan when he'd pointed Sam in MIT's direction. Now Tom was gone and Sam felt the need to get a B.S. degree in Agriculture. He'd heard some of his Dad's friends speaking about sustainable agriculture which the extension agent had introduced them to. Sam needed to learn more about the techniques applicable to the agricultural field.

Since the news of Tom's death had arrived, Sam had sought out and spoken with the High School guidance counselor. He had told Sam that Purdue had an excellent Agriculture program and suggested applying to the West Lafayette Campus and looking into a basketball scholarship there. The Boilermakers were a part of the Big Ten Conference.

In the meantime, he could spend another year in Elk Ridge, being there for his family. He wouldn't be starting school in the fall as he'd been planning. Even though Dr. LoNigro had indicated that Sam was smarter than anyone he'd ever met, how could they really know? They hadn't even been able to measure his IQ right. He said it was off the scale. How did they know this wasn't just a glitch?

Sam thought back to the basketball scholarship. Even before Tom had gone to the State Championships in 1964, Sam had decided to follow in Tom's athletics footprints. It made Sam happy that he wasn't only a "brain," but that he had exceptional athletic ability as well.

Okay. He'd let his parents know the direction he was planning to go in a few weeks. He couldn't do it now, of course, but soon.

Sam felt better after coming to a final conclusion. He walked back into the living room and saw Katie sitting on the couch. Going over to her, he sat down. She looked at him with sorrowful eyes and Sam put his arm around her. "I'm going to miss him too, Katie."

Katie looked down for a minute and then brought her eyes back to Sam's. "I know, Sam. I'm glad I still have you."

They continued to sit there together, feeling both a part of and yet strangely distant from the activities at the house. Life had changed for them and facing the future without their big brother was not a pleasant future to think about. They said nothing more.


	2. December 15, 1970

The Road Not Taken: Another Path

Chapter 2

December 18, 1970

Sam took the mail out of the large green mailbox at the end of the drive. Finding a letter addressed to him from Purdue, he quickly opened it and scanned the message.

He wasn't greatly surprised to see that he was being offered a full ride scholarship. OK, he'd be a Boilermaker. That was the name of the Purdue team, after all.

Sam had convinced his parents that his decision to wait until the following year to start college was a good plan. He'd couched the suggestion in the facts that his Dad could use the help of one more year, that he would be able to play High School Basketball another season as a second year senior if he didn't officially graduate that coming May, and that he could take some classes at Indiana State in nearby Terre Haute. All in all, it was win-win plan all around.

He'd be able to continue with his music studies at Indiana State. His most recent local music teacher had left to go to Julliard and, besides, he needed to pursue a more sophisticated study of music. He'd basically completed all the high school coursework necessary to go on to college, but to maintain his student designation so that he could play basketball one more year, he'd taken some drama courses. He figured that was one area where he could utilize his musical talents and his eidetic memory would come in handy for memorizing his lines.

Sam reached the door of the house and walked in. He heard his mother calling him from the kitchen.

"Sam, did you get the mail?" Thelma walked into the room, drying her hands on her apron.

"Yeah, Mom. Looks like I'm going to be a Boilermaker."

"Purdue came through." It was a statement more than a question.

"Yeah."

"Sam?" Thelma looked at her remaining son with a worried expression. "Are you _sure _this is what you want? That Dr. LoNigro sure made some compelling arguments for you to go to MIT. You've always had this desire to learn about things and I know your Physics teacher, Mr. Edwards, just about hit the roof when he learned you were going to apply at Purdue instead."

"Mom, we've been over this before. I want to be there for you and Dad. I _like _farming, I _like_ the cows, and I _want_ to stay here in Elk Ridge. Why would you question that?"

"Because, Sam," Thelma sighed but went on. "Since you were little, I've seen you chase after that dream of yours. You've always had some kind of idea about time. You once told me that you saw it in the math, but I don't know what that means. You should be studying what you want, not going into something because you feel obligated."

"I _am_ doing this because I want to." Sam stated this firmly, as if he was saying it as much to convince himself as his mother. "I know what I'm doing. It's the right thing for me to do."

"Okay, Sam, as long as you're certain." She smiled and patted his cheek. "I can't say I'm not glad you're going to be around."

Katie suddenly burst into the room. "Woohoo! Christmas Vacation! No more school for two weeks!"

"What are you going to do with all that time, Katie?" Sam teased her.

"Oh, I'm going over to Sarah's tonight to spend the night and we're going to plan it all out, Sam. Is that OK, Mom? Can I go?"

Thelma smiled. "You get your chores done first, young lady. If you get them finished, I guess it will be all right to spend the night out."

"Thanks, Mom. I'll get right on them." Katie looked at the envelope in Sam's hands. "What's that?"

"I'm going to Purdue next year. It's not too far. I'll be able to come home on some weekends."

"But that means you'll keep Tommy's old room longer. I wanted it." Katie pouted, feeling the world was being totally unfair.

"Hey, Sis. You'll get it soon enough. I'll tell you what, since I won't be home all the time, we'll switch rooms…" He saw Katie's face brighten and then fall at little as he clarified, "…in August. Would that be OK?"

"I guess. " She shrugged, not quite as happy but knowing it was the best she could hope for. "Thanks Sam." Katie ran out of the house towards the barn, eager to get her chores completed.

"That was nice of you, Sam."

"Well, Mom. I won't need as much space here when I'm living at college. Seems right that Katie should have the room."

Thelma gave her son a hug. "You better get your chores done too, Sam."

"Okay, Mom." He gave her a kiss on the cheek and followed his sister to the barn.


	3. April 8, 1971

The Road Not Taken: Another Path

Chapter 3

April 8, 1971

The day was one of those cold, rainy spring days in Indiana. Sam had walked out to the small cemetery where Tom was buried. He could have driven but somehow he needed the chilled air to drive him onwards. He'd been unable to bring himself here since the day they'd buried his brother. The thought of seeing that gravestone with Tom's name on it and the dates April 15, 1947- April 8, 1970 just made him shudder. Tom had died at 22, just short 7 days short of his 23rd birthday

He knew that his mother came here each week. He could see the flowers that she'd brought the previous Tuesday had started to fade, looking rather woeful – not unlike Sam's inner reflection. Each time she went to Tom's grave, she would come back and go into her room, not really saying anything to anyone until she came out. Sometimes it was a few minutes. Sometimes over an hour.

"God, Tom. I wish you were here. I miss you so much. I guess it just hit me with the State Finals just finished. This year we made it, didn't win though. No Nose wasn't around this year to cause us any problems." Sam grimaced as he thought of No Nose Pruitt and how he'd simply beaten him from all angles, including when the ref wasn't looking. Coach Cauley had been devastated after they lost against Bentleyville. Sam felt he'd let his team down. Lisa Parsons had left with No Nose. He'd thought she was just doing it to make him jealous but she ended up marrying him back last November. They already had a child on the way. His thoughts turned again to the recent State Finals. "Mom and Dad were at the game, but this time, I know you were first in their thoughts-- remembering your State Finals."

A cold wind blew through Sam and he pulled his coat closer around him. "Mom and Dad are doing OK, I guess. Mom's gotten quieter and Dad…well Dad spends a lot of time in his workshop and in the fields. He just seems lost in thought." Sam remembered how easy his Dad and Tom used to talk, like they were on the same wavelength. Somehow, even though he knew his Dad loved him as much as he loved Tom, they just didn't speak as easily. It bothered Sam a bit and he wished he could be closer to his father, like Tom had been. "I know they think about you a lot. I've seen Mom pulling out those picture albums before she goes to bed."

"Katie's 14 now and the boys are starting to call. I know Mom's really worried. Katie just seems to want to grow up in a single day." He smiled a bit as he remembered finding Katie and her friends Elaine, Sarah, and Mary Lou trying on different shades of eye shadow one day in her room. He'd told them that lots of guys liked a more natural look. They'd giggled and rolled their eyes and said he didn't know anything about girls.

It wasn't that Sam didn't like girls, he did. A lot. He'd even had a crush on Lisa Parsons but had been too shy to say anything. And Sam didn't like the way some of the guys at the school seemed to like "keeping track of their scores" like it was some sort of a game. He felt that being in a relationship with a girl should be special, even in the early stages.

The wind howled again and his thoughts suddenly turned back to what he was there to say. He shuffled his feet a bit and put his put his fist to his mouth, his eyes tightly shut. Then he looked up to that gray stone slab with Tom's name carved deeply into its surface and the words exploded from his lips. "Tom, I'm not going to MIT like you wanted. I'm going to help Dad out with the farm. You know how much it means to him. I know it's not what you expected me to do." His voice suddenly went almost to a whisper. "Heck, it's not what I expected to do." He stood there for a few moments, hugging his upper torso. Then his voice came to him again, with the same force as before "But, damn it, Tom! You're not here anymore. Dad needs me. I hope you can understand that I need to help him. I have to be here for him."

Tears started falling from Sam's eyes, obscured by the raindrops that had already found a home there. He felt the ache in his heart, the sadness that he'd never hear Tom's voice answer his again. Again, his voice grew softer and quietly he whispered, "I hope that heaven's a really nice place."

A deep wrenching sob escaped his body. "Why, Tom? _Why_? I know you'd always wanted a military career but this war, it's just too costly. I _need_ you here. I _need_ my big brother now more than ever. Just between you and me, I gotta admit I'm a bit scared. I've never really been away from home before. And you're too far away."

Sam pushed at his eyes, willing the tears to stop. His voice cracked a bit, his heart aching. "I just want to be your 'little brother' again."

Sam stood there in the somber, gray day feeling the exquisite pain of that somber, gray moment. Then he turned and walked away.


	4. August 19, 1971

The Road Not Taken: Another Path

Chapter 4

August 19, 1971

Sam had arrived at the dorm where he figured he would most likely live the next four years of his life, at least when he wasn't home for the summers. The previous few months had flown by so quickly, he was hardly aware that the date had come to leave home. First came the State Championships and then, high school graduation. He'd spent the summer helping his dad get the homestead in good shape since he would seldom be home to do any chores come fall.

He had awoken that morning to the sounds and scents of a full breakfast being prepared. _"Just like the day Tom left for Annapolis," _Sam recalled.

When he'd arrived downstairs, he found that all of the boxes and suitcases had already been put on the truck. "You guys trying to get rid of me or something?"

His mother had smiled. "Sam, honey, we just know that you've put this off longer than you'd originally planned. I know its right for you to leave, to start college. Time to chase after your dreams."

Sam had thought about that for a moment. Was he really going after _his_ dreams? No, he'd given those up the day that Tom had been buried, the day he'd decided not to go to MIT and the world that path would have opened up to him. Instead, he'd decided to follow where he felt his family could most use him, there on the farm, helping his dad. That's what a B.S. in Agriculture was all about.

Sam said nothing of this, of course. He'd done his best to convince his parents that this was really what he wanted. It was a decision he had made and he didn't want his parents to feel guilty about it. Now the day had come to move away from the only home he had ever known to a place where he'd learn things to help his Dad keep the farm in the family another generation or two.

They'd all sat down for a hearty Indiana farm breakfast of bacon, eggs, biscuits, butter, milk, and orange juice. His father lit up one of his Lucky Strikes after the meal. "Thelma, that had to have been the best send-off breakfasts anyone ever ate."

"Yeah, Mom. Thanks."

"Sam, I don't know what they'll be serving you up there at Purdue. I just wanted you to have a meal to remember."

"As if I could forget!" Sam went over and gave his mother a hug. Suddenly, he realized, he would be saying goodbye to her shortly. He knew he and his father would be leaving soon, taking truck to drive up to Purdue. He hugged his mother tighter. "I love you, Mom." He gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"Land's sake, Sam. It's not like you'll never be home again."

"I know, but I've never been away from the farm like this before. It's a bit scary."

"Everything is going to be okay, Sam. Now, you go on. I want your father back here before it gets dark."

"Okay, Mom." He gave her another kiss and walked towards the door.

"You gonna say goodbye to me?" Katie stood by the door, arms folded, hip jutted out.

Sam laughed. "Yeah, Sis. Goodbye." He walked over and gave her a big hug. "You need to help Mom and Dad out, you know."

"I know…they'll keep me too busy."

"You'll live, Katie." He bent down and gave her a kiss on the cheek. Katie hugged him tighter and pressed her face into his chest. "Sam…I'm…I'm..."

"I'm going to miss you too."

Katie looked up, suddenly brightening. "But I've got Tommy's room now! No take backs!"

Sam laughed again. "No take backs. Love you, Sis."

"Bye Sam."

The family walked out of the farmhouse together. His dad had gone to the back of the truck, making sure that the tarp was tied down. His mother brought out a picnic basket and handed it to Sam.

"Thanks, Mom. I'll give you a call tonight. I love you. Bye." He gave her another kiss and climbed into the truck.

"You'll do fine, Sam." Thelma and Katie stood in the yard, not wanting to let Sam out of their sight until the last possible minute.

"It'll be a full day, Thelma. See you tonight." John Beckett leaned in and gave his wife a kiss and then climbed in behind the wheel. "Katie, you make sure you get those cows milked. Your mother said she'd help you but you make sure to pull your share of the work." Katie nodded. He started the truck and they pulled out down the long drive towards the farm road.

Sam had looked behind him until the house was out of sight.

The ride up to Purdue had taken about 3 hours and his father had helped him unload the truck. Afterwards, they'd broken into the picnic basket and had the lunch that Thelma had packed: ham salad sandwiches, pickles, and cold lemonade. After they finished the "main meal," Sam smiled and handed his father one of the Rice Krispies squares that his mother had packed for dessert. He'd rather have her cobbler, but that would have been messier to pack, and the little square dessert was a favorite as well.

After they finished eating, John Beckett cleared his throat. "Well, son. I know you'll do fine here. I'm glad you decided to follow in the family business, although I don't know why you need to go to school to learn farming. I could teach you myself." He stopped for a moment thinking whether he should go on, but deciding to anyways. "I guess that brain of yours needs to hear it with all the mumbo-jumbo these professors use. Agriculture is a far cry from what you were planning to do. I wasn't sure it was what you wanted. Last time you and Tom were together, you seemed hell bent on going to that school in Massachusetts. Tom told me and your mother that going there would be best for you."

Sam looked down, pushing away the part of him that said he still wished he was going to that "school in Massachusetts." "Yeah, Dad. That was another time. I guess I just thought better of it. This way, I'll be a lot closer to home and will be able to work on the farm in the summers."

"That will be a help. I'd best get back. Leaving Katie to do the milking even with your Mom's help is not the best choice."

"Yeah. She'll be all right, Dad. Don't go too hard on her. I'll give you guys a call later."

They embraced, giving each other a long hug. John Beckett got back into his truck and drove away. Sam turned and walked up the stairs to his new dorm room.

His roommate, according to the paperwork that Purdue had sent him, was another freshman. His name was Peter Fisk. Sam hoped that the survey that he'd filled out had allowed them to pair him with a compatible person. Sam wasn't difficult to get along with but he hated being around obnoxious people.

As he unpacked the footlocker – the one that Tom had used in Annapolis – he considered what his life would be like on campus. Between classes, basketball practices, and games, he had little spare time. But Tom had always said that college was a time to build friendships.

Sam had always been somewhat shy. Not a shrinking violet, of course, but one who tended to keep to himself. He'd found that most people weren't interested in discussing the ideas and concepts that came unbidden to his mind, constantly opening up possibilities like a gate opening upon a beautiful garden.

As he put the clothes away in the non-descript chest of drawers that came with the dorm room, he heard the door opening. Turning, he saw a young man about his own age with red hair and more freckles than he'd ever seen enter the room, suitcases in hand.

The young man spoke up, "Uh, they said this was my room."

"You must be Peter Fisk, then."

"Yeah, but I go by Pete." He looked down at a letter in his hand. "Are you Samuel Beckett?"

"Yeah, but I go by Sam. Pleased to meet you, Pete." Sam smiled.

"Right back atcha," Pete replied, grinning too.

"So, Pete. Where are you from?"

"Oh, a little town in southeast Indiana. Canaan, Indiana to be exact. My family raises corn and soybeans.

"My family is in the dairy business. So, are you an Ag major too?"

"Yeah. I guess they figure putting the two of us together would give up some common ground."

"Uh huh. Sounds right." Sam noticed that Pete had placed his stuff on the bed and was getting ready to go out the door again. "You have more stuff? I can help you get it in the room."

"OK. I just have a few boxes. Couldn't bring too much on the bus."

Sam helped Pete to get his things into the room. As Pete unpacked, Sam finished what little he had to do, including making his bed.

Pete looked over at Sam's space. "Is that all you brought?"

"Didn't think I'd need too much."

"Are you going to use your bookshelf?

"Don't really need it. I don't keep a lot of books with me."

"Oh, I love to read. My mom says we could open a library with all the books I have."

"I didn't say I didn't like to read. I said I don't keep a lot of books with me."

"Why not?"

"Well, once I read something, I remember it word for word."

Pete's eyes flew open and he looked as though he thought Sam might be pulling his leg. "No way!"

"That's the way it works for me. I have what is called an eidetic memory."

"Wow! Taking tests must be a breeze for you!"

"Still have to know the applications," Sam stated reasonably.

"I suppose so," Pete conceded.

They spent the next hour or so getting to know one another. Sam learned that Pete was the only boy in a family with three sisters, one older and two younger. The two younger ones were twins.

"So, you're in the middle, like me," mused Sam.

"Yeah…I got it from both ends."

"The Law of Sibling Survival."

Sam really liked Pete. They had a lot in common from the standpoint of their farming background and majors. Pete was a genuinely friendly soul who didn't like to play loud music or stay up all night. Neither of them "did" drugs. Pete wasn't into sports from a player's standpoint, but loved to watch basketball. He was intrigued, though, with Sam's interest in martial arts.

"I'd really like to learn something in that area. Judo, Karate, something like that. What do you do?"

"I've got black belts in Tae Kwon Do and Karate. I'd like to get to know more about Judo, sabatt, and mu tai though."

"Why do you need to know so many?"

"It's not that I need to know _any_," Sam reasoned, the look on his face thoughtful. "But each one has subtle and some not so subtle differences. It's in seeing the similarities and differences in things that ideas are born. Also, I find martial arts feed the soul. It provides a way to quiet the mind as well as to stimulate it."

"That's pretty deep. I'd just like to learn how to defend myself," Pete had replied, grinning broadly.

They had unpacked and both were getting rather hungry. Checking their new student packets, they learned where the student center and the cafeteria was. They locked up the dorm room and headed over. Sam noticed on one of the bulletin boards, a notice offering free classes in Judo at the gym. He pointed it out to Pete. Since both of them had Tuesday nights at 6:00 p.m. free, they decided to sign up together.

Sam thought to himself that any day when one made a friend was a great day. They continued into the cafeteria to continue their getting to know one another over what they hoped would be a good meal.


	5. December 25, 1971

The Road Not Taken: Another Path

Chapter 5

12/25/1971

Christmas Morning. Sam loved this day for as long as he could remember. It was a huge feast for all his senses. He enjoyed the bright lights and the pretty presents under the tree. The smell of the pine tree, which his mother decorated with the family ornaments, some passed down through the families, and some which the Beckett children had made themselves through the years. The feel of the velvet table runner on the dining room table. The taste of the special foods his mother would make for the holidays, especially her cookies. And the sounds of the Christmas music, whether it involved hearing the church choir, singing carols, or playing the records throughout the season.

Indeed, the first time anyone knew that Sam had musical ability was during his second Christmas. They'd been at the church and while John was getting the family's coats, Sam had toddled over to the piano that sat next to the choir loft. He'd pulled himself up to the seat and had started picking out the tune for one of his favorite Christmas songs, Joy to the World. His little hands would not allow him to play more than the simple melody but he didn't miss a note.

Thelma had sat down beside him and asked if he knew any other songs. Sam played "O Come All Ye Faithful" and "Angels We Have Heard on High." The following spring, the family had purchased a piano and Sam was encouraged to play. He started formal lessons when he was four. His talent had certainly come quite far since then. He absolutely loved music. The beauty of how the harmonies blended was truly inspiring.

It was still dark out but Sam leaped out of bed. Even if it was Christmas morning, the chores still needed to be done. And since he was home, he wanted to give his dad a bit of a break. He put on his clothes and headed out to the barn to take care of milking the cows, feeding the chickens, and slopping the hogs.

After finishing his work, he headed back into the house to get cleaned up before breakfast. Coming down the stairs after his shower, his father greeted him. "Good morning, Sam. What time did you get up? Looks like you finished all the morning chores on your own."

Sam grinned. "Morning, Dad. Yeah, I figured I'd give you a nice early Christmas present."

"Thanks. I appreciate it."

They walked into the kitchen where Thelma was putting some freshly baked cinnamon rolls out on the table. "You two want coffee?"

"That would be great, Mom. Where's Katie?"

"She'll be down in just a moment." Thelma handed the two mugs to Sam and his father. Sam took a sip and sighed. "What's that all about, Sam?"

"Oh…they just don't make coffee like yours at Purdue."

A few minutes later, Katie appeared, and the family headed into the living room for the Christmas morning ritual of opening presents.

Sam randomly pulled a box out from the pile. "The tag says that this one is for Dad from Katie." He handed it over to his father.

John put his coffee on the end table beside him. "I wonder what this could be?" He unwrapped the gift, finding inside a new John Deere hat. "Thank you, Katie. This will be nice. My old one is getting a bit raggedy." Katie beamed.

John pulled the next gift from the pile. "Ok, this one is to Katie from Sam." He handed it to Katie who tore into the box ravenously. She pulled a sweatshirt with the Purdue logo from the box. "Oh, Sam. Thanks. I can wear it to one of your upcoming games."

Sam thought about the basketball season, which had started in November with a bang. His coach was quite happy with the way the freshman from Elk Ridge was coming along. While he had played forward in high school, the coach wanted him playing point guard. It was a switch for Sam, but he'd taken to the position with ease, assisting his team to get an average of 25 points per game.

"Yeah, I'd like that."

The morning progressed with the various members of the family opening presents. Sam had given his mother a new scarf and Katie had given her a pin. John's gift to his wife was a lovely lace and silk blouse in emerald green. Thelma had given John a new dress shirt and a tie to wear on Sundays. Sam had given his Dad a new pocket knife.

Katie had received a dress and the new "Wildlife" album from Paul McCartney's new band "Wings" from her parents. Sam had received new guitar strings from his sister, a nice button down navy blue shirt from his mother, and a watch from his father. There were a few more gifts from "Santa" although not as many as in years past.

After the presents were opened, the family headed back to the kitchen for a late morning brunch. The sweet rolls had been wonderful but nothing could compete with his mother's breakfast casserole. It was a layered creation constructed with toast, eggs, cheese, and bacon.

After brunch, Katie announced that she was heading over to Elaine's to see what she'd gotten for Christmas. Reminded to be back for dinner by 5:30 p.m., Katie headed out the door. John Beckett decided to head out to his workshop where he was "building something." Sam stayed behind. "Mom, I gave Dad a gift of chores and I want to do the same for you. What do you need done?"

Thelma smiled at Sam. "Why don't you keep me company in the kitchen? I have some potatoes that need peeling."

"Okay." They spent the next couple of hours in the kitchen, Sam peeling or cutting whatever his mother needed for the preparation of the dinner. While they were working, they talked.

"So, how is school going, son?"

"Fine, Mom. I like my classes and Pete is really a great guy. He's really taken to Judo. Nice to have a sparring partner." Sam finished peeling the carrots and started on the potatoes.

Thelma looked over to her son, smiling. "I'm glad you've found a friend there, Sam. I know you were a bit worried about going off to college."

"Yeah. Meeting Pete has been great. The way he talks about his sisters makes me think of Katie. Makes me realize how nice it is to have her around. Before I went off to school, it always seemed that Katie could be so annoying. Now that I'm gone, I realize miss her."

"I understand, Sam. You and Katie are growing up. Uncle Billy felt the same way about me after he left home." Thelma smiled for a moment, thinking about her older brother. Then her forehead wrinkled and her face tightened. "Your sister worries me a bit sometimes. Tom was so responsible and you were rather shy. You two just didn't give a body much to worry about. Katie, though..." Thelma sighed. "Well, Katie just doesn't put the same emphasis into school that you two did. She's more interested in clothes, boys, and music. Sometimes, I'm concerned about the direction she's going."

"Oh, Mom. Katie's okay." Sam looked up at his mother. "Pete says his little sisters are the same way and there's two of them. Katie'll be alright."

"I know Sam. It's just…hmmm" Thelma decided to change the subject. "So, tell me about your classes."

"Agriculture is really a pretty interesting field, and all my professors are really good. I never realized how many new innovations were available to farmers."

"Yes, well that's all well and good, Sam. But the problem is farms aren't pulling in nearly enough to pay for new equipment. Quite a few people are having problems keeping their farms."

"Yeah, I read in the paper about the Walters boys holding up the bank this week. What could have driven them to that extreme?"

"Sam," Thelma turned to look at him, concern in her eyes, "they were about to lose their farm. Things aren't easy right now. We'd better have a good year or we may be facing some tough decisions ourselves."

Sam looked at his mother aghast. He knew that things had been tight but possibly losing the farm? "Surely it can't be that bad, Mom."

"Yes, Sam. It's that bad. I know your father is extremely worried. He's working sixteen hours a day just to keep things going."

"I guess I should drop out of school then."

"You'll do no such thing, Sam."

"But Mom, if the farm isn't here, I don't have anything to come back to."

"The Lord will provide, son. We just have to keep our faith."

"Mom, I think the Lord helps those who help themselves, too." Sam's head tilted and he got a far away look in his eyes. "Maybe we can set up a cooperative? There's this new organic movement spreading. They promote eating locally grown produce. They've got this catchy slogan _'Know Your Farmer, Know Your Food.' _Maybe we can set up a farmer's market in Terre Haute."

Thelma consdered this suggestion. "That might be an idea your Dad would want to hear. Why don't you go out to the workshop and let him know about it."

"You sure you don't need me here anymore?"

"No, Sam. You've saved me a lot of work by doing all the peeling and cutting. I can manage the rest of it easily." Thelma walked over to Sam and gave him a kiss on the top of his head. "Thanks for the help."

"Anytime." Sam got up and washed up the knife and cutting board. "Okay, Mom. Let me go talk with Dad." Sam walked over and gave his mother a hug and then headed out to the workshop.

Peeking his head into his father's workshop, Sam asked, "Dad? Can I speak with you a minute?"

"Sure, Sam. If you want, I can stop working out here and we can play some table tennis."

Sam smiled. Whenever there was a problem, his dad would suggest a game of ping-pong. Sam figured that it helped give them both something else to "focus" on so that they could talk about things that might be hard to say otherwise. They'd settled many an issue while batting around that little white ball. "No, Dad. I think I'd just like to help you out in here. What are you building?"

"Oh, your mother's always wanted a cedar lined wardrobe to store the winter clothes in. I decided that I could build it and give it to her for her birthday."

Sam picked up one of the maple boards. He knew that was one of his mother's favorite woods. "This wood is beautiful, Dad. What would you like me to do?"

"Well, I'm going to need to have these boards all cut to the same length. If you use this one as a measure, then I can get started with some of the scroll work."

"Okay." Sam started to measure a board against the one his father had handed him.

"Remember," his father said, "measure twice, cut once."

Sam grinned. "Yeah. I will."

"So, what did you want to talk to me about?"

Sam explained his idea to his father about organic farming and the farmers market. "I don't know about that, Sam. You think the people in Terre Haute are really gonna pay more for produce and milk that been raised that way? It won't even look as good." John's body language told Sam that he was extremely skeptical about changing his farming habits.

"Yeah, Dad, I do. There's a whole movement going on. People really are getting into this 'no lab created pesticides.' And if you are organic in producing the milk, you'll get more for that too."

John thought about that. He realized that if something didn't change and soon, he'd have heck of a time keeping the farm. This was at least worth looking into. "Well, how would we go about doing this thing? Assuming we decided to try it."

"I've got a three week break from school. How about I set up a meeting at the church to pitch the idea to the community, the ones who will come anyway."

John patted Sam on the back. "Thanks, Son. Maybe this agriculture degree is a good idea after all."

Sam stayed the rest of the day until supper time working with his Dad in the workshop as they worked on the wardrobe. John had shown him the plans and Sam stated that it would really please his mother. They didn't talk much more, other than discussing the basketball season. Sam was simply enjoying his father's company. Time seemed to fly and it seemed all too soon when Thelma told them to get ready for dinner.

Holidays at the Becketts always included dressing in nice clothes for dinner. Sam took his shower and got dressed in his suit. He continued thinking about the conversations he'd had with his parents and vowed to do everything in his power to keep the farm. It worried him that if the farm was lost, that foregoing MIT would have been a poor choice. Somehow, he needed to make it all work.

As he walked into the dining room, Sam's eyes softened. As always, his mother had taken out the good china and silver. The white linen table cloth that had been passed down through her family for three generations covered the wooden table that his grandfather had built. This home meant everything to Sam. He wouldn't let it slip away.


	6. January 17, 1972

The Road Not Taken: Another Path

Chapter 6

January 17, 1972

The Christmas break was over and classes were beginning once again. Sam was happy to be back at school. Additionally, basketball season was going full bore. Sam had traveled further a field with his team, the away games taking him places he wouldn't have seen otherwise. The only part he didn't like was getting on the planes. The fear of heights he'd had since he was nine made that part of being on the team hard to take.

He remembered back to the day when he first became aware of that fear. He and Tom had gone to a Tarzan movie. When they got back to the farm, they'd been playing in the loft and swinging on the rope on the pulley that was used to move things in the barn. Tom had noticed that the rope had loosened and he'd sent Sam up to tighten it. Sam had noticed the drop of three stories and had found himself frozen with fear. Ever since that day, getting higher than a few feet off the ground had scared him terribly.

If it hadn't been for George Fetzer, one of his teammates, he didn't know how he would have gotten through some of those flights. George played forward. He was from Marion, Ohio and was a year ahead of him in school. They usually flew on one of the smaller planes with two seats next to each other on either side of the aisle. The first time they gotten on, George had offered Sam the window seat. Sam remembered that conversation.

"Uh….no. I'll just sit here on the aisle."

"All right." George had watched as Sam had sat down, closed his eyes and started taking breaths in through his nose and out his mouth, his hands gripping the arms of the seat. "You OK?"

"Um, no. Not really. I have a fear of heights."

"I guess flying can be a bit difficult then."

"Yeah. I don't like it much." Sam gave a nervous little laugh, "but I guess if we have to play elsewhere, I don't have a choice."

George had immediately closed the sash on the window next to him. "Well, at least you don't have to see anything to scare you out this way."

"Are you afraid of heights, too?

"No, but if you are, I don't have to look out the window."

Sam had smiled, gratefully. "Thank you. I really appreciate it."

"No problem. So, you're new on the team this year."

"Yeah. I'm a freshman Ag student."

"I'm a sophomore. Getting my degree in mechanical engineering."

They had spent the next hour talking about their plans and school and before Sam knew it, they were landing.

"Gee, I hardly even noticed the flight. That's a first."

"Yeah, if you keep your mind off of it, it's not nearly so bad."

"Thanks, George," Sam had said, his eyes showing how much it meant to him that his new friend had helped him out.

"Hey, I had a great time talking. You're a pretty interesting dude to talk to."

This type of thing had occurred during each away game where they had flown. George always took the window seat and kept up a conversation with Sam throughout the flight. George had been impressed with Sam's natural ability to think through problems and his mechanical aptitude, which Sam attributed to working on the farm equipment. George wasn't so sure. When they had discussed Bernoulli's Principle and the various areas that it touched in mechanical engineering, George had felt that Sam's grasp far exceeded what most in his chosen field took from it.

When they were back on campus, they also would get together after games. That was how George met Pete Fisk. They had also become friends. Sam had found that Tom was indeed right about making friends in college. It was exciting getting to know people studying in their chosen academic fields and their lives beyond that.

Sam found the array of possibilities on campus interesting. He found himself wanting to learn more about a variety of topics. He wanted to learn more about physics, medicine, computer science, engineering, and to further his knowledge of music and archeology. Whenever he had the time, he would go to lectures by visiting subject experts. College provided such a dizzying smorgasbord of academic pursuits. Sam had decided to take at least a few courses outside of the Agricultural curriculum.

He'd gone to the counseling department and found that he could receive college credits by taking CLEP (College-Level Examination Program) tests which would allow him to achieve an advanced placement. As such, Sam would be able to take some higher-level physics classes which fascinated him. Even if it wouldn't help out much on the farm, it did provide a level of satisfaction to keep his mind sharp. While the Ag coursework was interesting, he found that he needed to expand outwards from its limited scope.

Between basketball, his schoolwork, and lectures, Sam was quite happy. He only occasionally wondered if going to MIT would have been a better choice. After all, he could still learn so much. He had friends and he knew that he had been able to help out his father. He was sure that the Farmer's Market would be an excellent source of income for the struggling farmers in his hometown.

At the meeting that had been held in the church just after the first of the year, Sam had been gratified to find that about two thirds of the farm families in Elk Ridge and some of the surrounding communities had decided to attend. While he was not the most comfortable with public speaking, Sam was able to present the concept in an exciting light. He had invited the Department of Agriculture Extension Agent, Fred Johnson, who had long experience with many of the farmers, to help him with the pitch. With both of them touting the concept as a potentially partial solution to the issues facing their farms, many had left with hope firmly implanted again. Sam felt that if even a third of the people in the room made it a reality, the Farmer's Market would help them keep their farms. His father voiced his pride in Sam after the meeting, giving Sam a warm feeling inside.

Now, back at school, Sam looked forward to the next semester. The future had never looked brighter. He had his friends, school was going great, basketball as always was a joy, and the farm looked to be if not healthy, at least on the mend. All in all, Sam felt life was good.


	7. April, 8, 1972

The Road Not Taken: Another Path

Chapter 7

April 8, 1972

Sam thought back over the previous two years. His life had certainly changed since learning that Tom would never be coming home. This time last year this day had been a dismal one with overcast skies. This year, it was beautiful, bright with Spring flowers. While Sam still missed his brother deeply, the sharp edge had dulled a bit. Life did indeed go on.

Still, Sam felt the need to visit Tom's grave again. He figured that if nothing else, making this yearly pilgrimage would give him the semblance of talking with Tom, even though the conversation would be one sided. He figured that coming more often would mean he was okay with Tom's death and that just wasn't how he felt. He walked up to the gravestone and knelt down, placing and arranging the flowers that his mother had asked him to bring in the holder.

"Hi Tom. I still can't believe you're never going to be coming home. I keep finding myself wondering when we'll talk again. There's so much to tell."

Sam continued to arrange the flowers and picked at the dried leaves that still lay over his brother's grave from the previous fall. He found the activity helped him to concentrate on the news and not on the reason there weren't any answering words to his flow of conversation.

"Basketball is going really well. I finally have learned to block the way you tried to show me that last Thanksgiving. I guess you were right about my being too small then. I'm six foot now. George has been helping me with blocking though. You'd like George, Tom. He's an engineering whiz and a good friend.

"And my roommate, Pete. We're in a lot of the same classes. He had some difficulties with testing but is doing much better now. We've taken Judo together and now he's starting to see how he can use meditation and martial arts disciplines to help him slow down and think through the problems. His grades have really improved."

Sam turned the conversation to family. "Tom, you'd be really impressed with Katie. She's growing up to be a fine young lady. She's starting to look more like those old photographs of Mom when she was younger. Mom and Dad are still doing fine."

Sam suddenly turned quite serious and his brow creased. "They're both concerned about the farm. Things aren't going too well for small family farms right now, but I think what I'm learning will help them weather through these tough times. Dad's really feeling pretty good about the farmer's market. He's still working hard but doesn't feel quite as much stress. I wish he'd consider giving up the cigarettes though. They just aren't good for him. Mom has taken up sewing things she plans to sell at the farmer's market. She figures that way she can help to bring in some income."

Sam countenance continued to take on a serious set and his actions took on a more frenzied activity. "Vietnam is still going strong, although we've been in peace talks. I don't know though, we walked away from the table about a month ago and now there seems to be more bombing then ever. It just doesn't look like it's going to be a war we're going to win. So many have died and there are so many POWs and MIAs. They're still holding peace protests." Sam's eyes filled with tears, which he brushed off with his upper arm, his hands a bit dirty from cleaning off the grave. "I just wish you'd never gone over there." He paused for a moment knowing that no matter how much he would have wished it, Tom would never have stayed behind. "I know you felt you had to, Tom. That it was your duty to fulfill your oath to serve your county. It just feels like your sacrifice was in vain."

Sam brushed off his hands and looked up at the gravestone. He put out his hand to touch Tom's name. "Ah, Tom. I…I…" His hand and his head dropped simultaneously, the emotion of the moment becoming too overwhelming. He squeezed his eyes tightly to stop the tears that again came to his eyes. "Well, I guess I'd better get back home. Dinner will be ready soon and Mom's making her meatloaf." He picked himself up, surveying the gravesite once more. "Talk with you later, Tom," and he walked away.


	8. June 16, 1972

The Road Not Taken: Another Path

Chapter 8

June 15, 1972

_It's got to be around here somewhere!_ thought Sam, rechecking the handwritten note with the number against the map. He slowly drove down the street again, checking the numbers. _Nope, not to be found!_

He saw a man out in the yard clipping the edging at the sidewalk. _Guess it's time to ask for directions!_ He pulled up to the curb and rolled down the passenger side window.

"Excuse me, sir, but I'm trying to find 1655 Mark Street." The man looked confused. "Here's the note my friend wrote with the address."

The man took the note and looked at it strangely for a moment. Then comprehension dawned. "No, it's 1655 Mary Street. He wrote the Y like a K.

Sam looked at the note again. "Maybe George should be in pre-med rather than engineering! His handwriting is bad enough. Thanks"

"Anytime." The man turned back to clipping his edging.

Sam made the correction and drove over to George's house. He parked along the curb and then got out. He saw his friend get off the front porch swing and walk down to the car. Sam walked to the trunk, opened it and took out his duffle bag.

"I wondered when you'd get here."

Sam shrugged and gave George a lop-sided grin. "Well, I couldn't read your handwriting…went up the wrong street."

"Sorry about that," said George sheepishly. Suddenly, his eyes lit up and a big grin crossed his face. "Hey…I've got a great surprise!"

They started up the walkway towards the house. Sam looked over, and matching the word to the quizzical expression on his face simply said, "What?"

"You know I told you Maggie has a friend, Donna Elesee, over at Lawrence? Well, Maggie asked Donna if she'd like to double date tonight with us. Donna said yes, so you've got a date tonight!"

Sam's face fell a bit. He was rather shy and being set up for a blind date was not what he considered a fun event to contemplate. "Um…Okay…"

"Hey, Beckett, it's not like it's the end of the world!" George shook his head, wondering if Sam ever took his head out of a book long enough to notice the fairer sex. "Donna is a really nice girl and she's pretty too."

They walked into the house and George led Sam to what was obviously the guest bedroom in the back of the house. It was a little more "fu-fu" than the decorating scheme at the Beckett farmhouse, but he'd only be in it for two nights.

Sam figured that since everything was already set up, the best he could do was enjoy the ride. After all, it would only be for one night. He asked what was planned for the evening and George told him they were to pick up the girls at 6:30 p.m. that night. Sam checked his watch. It was going on 3:00 p.m. so they figured they had a little time to kill before they needed to get ready. They went out to George's back yard where his father had laid a half court basketball pad. George and Sam played until 5:00. Sam thought back to the similar games he and his brother Tom had played. He missed Tom.

After getting cleaned up and dressed, they hopped into George's car and drove over to Lawrence College. It was a Catholic girl's school. Maggie was taking her coursework in English Literature as she planned to teach. She had a professor by the name of Gerald Bryant who she said was a real scumbag. It was _known_ across the campus that one of his students, Jamie Lee, was having an affair with him. It didn't portent to end well.

Her friend, Donna, was a physics major but they had met in Dr. Bryant's class. Even physics majors had to take English Literature. _Heck_, thought Sam ruefully, _even Ag majors had to take English Literature._ Donna was a year ahead of Sam in school although she was only about eight months older than he. George had told him that she worked at the Rothskeller, the restaurant on campus as a waitress. Sam was a bit nervous. He hadn't had extensive experience in dating, spending most of his spare time either playing basketball, studying, or practicing piano. He noticed his hands getting a bit moist and rubbed them on the thigh of his pants.

They stopped at the desk in the lobby of the dorm and informed the student aide that they were there to pick up Ms. Jenkins and Ms. Elesee. The aide called up to their rooms to inform them that their dates were waiting. About five minutes later, the two women came down the stairs. Sam had met Maggie at one of the basketball games earlier that year so he assumed that the other woman was Donna.

He was struck, literally struck, by her beauty. Donna's face was oval with a medium complexion. She had on makeup but it was subtle, the tan eye shadow and light mascara highlighting her chocolate brown eyes. Her naturally red lips were lightly glossed and when she smiled, he saw perfect, brilliantly white teeth. She was wearing a mint green turtleneck sweater without arms and a green and white bias plaid skirt with a coordinated belt. Her dark brown hair was lightly curled and cascaded down her back. The front had been pulled back and was held with a ribbon, which allowed her ears to show. She wore simple pearl earrings. Her only other jewelry was a plain gold watch.

George spoke up. "Donna, I'd like you to meet my buddy and basketball teammate, Sam Beckett."

Donna put her hand out "Pleased to meet you, Sam."

George completed the introductions by informing Sam of what he already knew, "Sam, this is Donna Elesee, Maggie's friend.

Sam took Donna's hand as he looked into her eyes. And what eyes they were. He felt he could get lost within them. "Uh, pleased to meet you as well, Donna." Oh that name! From his study of ancient languages, a hobby of his, he knew it was Latin for "lady." It certainly fit her. He loved the sound of it.

"George tells me you're studying agriculture?" Donna asked with utmost politeness.

"Yeah, my family has a dairy farm in Elk Ridge, Indiana. I plan to work it with my Father once I graduate."

"Sound's very…pastoral."

"Well, it's a lot of work. There are the cows, of course. But we also grow corn and hay for the animals to eat over the winter when there's no pasture for them. And, we have some vegetables that we grow for personal use. Some other livestock as well."

"I see."

"George said that you are studying physics."

"Yes. It's a fascinating subject. I'm interested in understanding how our world works."

"I had considered that field myself. I've read everything Einstein has ever written as well as Newton, Fermi, Oppenheimer, Bohr, Heisenberg, Maxwell, and most of the other leading researchers."

"You've read all that and you're _not_ a physics major? Why?"

"I'm interested in the working of the world as well. I used to think a great deal about the implications of Quantum Physics and Special Relativity on the concept of space-time."

"Really!" Donna smiled. This guy that Maggie had begged her to go out with was much more than the "cute guy" that Maggie described. Donna had expected a strapping hayseed from the Indiana countryside. She'd only agreed to go because Maggie was such a good friend and this friend of George's would only be visiting a couple of days. She knew that Maggie wanted to be with George and that meant finding a date for Sam Beckett. Now, here he was spouting a love for physics that certainly rivaled, if not exceeded, most physics majors.

Sam had continued speaking about his interest in physics. "I especially am concerned with the incompatibles between the two great theories. It just doesn't seem right that one theory so fully describes the macro world and the other the micro world but both are fundamentally at odds with each other."

_Wow. This guy really knows his physics! Many physics majors glossed over that and here he was getting to the heart of the greatest debate in physics history right off the bat! _Donna smiled, "Yes. That's such an exciting area. I, myself, am interested in working in the area of Quantum Physics. I plan to go to graduate school when I finish here at Lawrence.

"Where?"

"Well, I'm hoping Caltech."

"I hope that works out for you." Sam was smiling.

"Uh, guys…" Maggie broke in.

Sam realized that from the moment he and Donna had started talking, the world had become simply the two of them. Now, Maggie had pulled him back to the larger reality. He blushed. "Yeah?"

"We really need to get going. Our reservations are for 7:00 p.m."

Sam couldn't remember going out with anyone who made him feel the way that Donna made him feel. She was smart, beautiful, and had a sense of humor that put him at ease. He was happy when George suggested going to the Rothskeller for lunch the next day since Donna would be working. They had arrived at Lawrence College at noon and picked Maggie up at her dorm. Walking to the little restaurant was pleasant.

On the way over, Sam asked George if he'd mind not hanging out with him that night. He wanted to ask Donna to a movie. George had looked over to Maggie and both smiled at each other and Sam realized that this weekend had been a conspiracy by both of them.

"Actually, Sam, I was sort of hoping you'd say that. When I told Maggie about you loving physics so much, even though that's not your major, she thought that Donna and you might hit it off. I'm glad it worked out."

"Thanks both of you for thinking about me. Donna is great."

As they walked into the eating area, they saw a number of black light posters on the wall. They glowed and provided the room with a bit of youthful attitude.

Sam, George, and Maggie were seated at a table toward the center of the room. They checked their menus. Sam ordered a Coke, cheeseburger (medium rare, hold the tomato, and extra onions) and fries. Maggie chose a salad and George had a patty melt with a Coke and fries. Sam noticed that Donna was again well coordinated with a black low cut shell that showed just a bit of cleavage and black and white skirt with matching sweater.

The food was brought to the table and Sam asked when Donna would be getting off work.

"I have the 11 to 5 shift today."

"Would you like to go to a movie or something?" Sam was amazed. His shyness didn't seem to be holding him back at all.

"Yeah, that would be nice." Donna's smile lit up the room from Sam's perspective.

"Okay, would six 'o'clock be good? Pick you up at your dorm like last night?"

"That would be perfect." She noticed that she had several other customers who had walked in. "Uh, excuse me, but I need to get back to work. I'll see you tonight."

"Sure." Sam felt good. He was really looking forward to the movie.

He picked her up as agreed and they went to see the Poseidon Adventure. Both had found the movie to be entertaining, even if the storyline was a bit unbelievable.

It was after the movie, over coffee and pie in the local diner, when they had really hit it off. They had discussed mathematical proofs and some of the leading edge concepts in Physics research. Sam was ecstatic that this woman with such a beautiful mind and he were getting along so well. It was after midnight when the waitress had let them know the café would be closing.

Sam drove Donna back to Lawrence and walked her back to her dorm. He asked her if he could write her and when she had said yes, he felt all was right with the world. He asked if he might kiss her and she shyly gave her consent. He took her chin in his hand and their lips met. It was like electricity. As they both pulled away, Sam looked into Donna's eyes.

"Thank you." She looked back at him, a question in her eyes. "Thank you for agreeing to last night and for letting me take you out again tonight." She smiled.

"It was my pleasure. I look forward to your letter." She then gave him a final kiss on his cheek and turned to walk into the dorm.

Sam watched, smiling, as she walked past the desk to the staircase, looking back at him and giving him a small wave. Then she disappeared around the corner, and was gone from sight. With a grin, Sam turned to walk back to his car with a feeling in his heart that felt like he could burst into song at any moment.


	9. August 8, 1972

The Road Not Taken: Another Path

Chapter 9

August 8, 1972

Sam opened his eyes, seeing the familiar ceiling of his room in the Beckett homestead. He realized that he was happier today then he'd been in the past two years. Things were going so well. He'd finished his first year of college, his first collegiate season of basketball, and had found an incredible woman that he felt certain he was falling in love with.

Donna was the most wonderful person he'd ever known. She had a brilliant insight into physics and he was comfortable talking with her. The fact that she was knock-dead gorgeous on the outside as well didn't hurt matters one bit.

Since meeting on the double date in June, Sam and Donna had traded letters on a weekly basis if not more often. While phone contact was also a factor, they'd found that the calls tended to be rather long and therefore the long distance charges were high. In deference to their limited budgets, a first class stamp was the best deal. In addition, the ability to re-read the letters, savoring both the personal and academic issues, was a joy. Donna also imparted news about Lawrence, including the sad news that Dr. Gerald Byrant and Jamie Lee had married, apparently on the insistence of her father. About a month after the wedding, Jamie Lee had committed suicide and Dr. Bryant had lost his tenure. Even though both Maggie and she felt the man was a womanizing scum bucket, neither of them would've wished this situation on anyone.

When Sam had come home that Sunday night after meeting Donna, his mother had commented on the change. He'd looked more like the Sam she'd seen prior to Tom's death. It was as if his spirit had been set free from the confines he'd imposed on it.

She'd shaken her head at his description of the Saturday evening he'd spent with Donna, going over math proofs and discussing theories too esoteric for Thelma's tastes. Ever since Sam was five, he had enjoyed math. He'd been given a tutor by the school system, a hired student from the Math Department at Indiana State in Terre Haute. While Thelma and John insisted that Sam go through regular school for his socialization needs, they also recognized that his special gifts needed to be nurtured. Thus Sam had been exposed at an early age to ideas and concepts most children didn't even know existed nor would have cared about if they'd stumbled across the information.

As he approached adolescence, Sam would attend a seminar from time to time presented by a series of visiting professors at Indiana State. The first time he attended such an event, his hand had been ignored during the question and answer session afterwards. Sam had persisted and the professor had reluctantly allowed Sam to voice his question, expecting it to be trivial at best and wondering why a child of twelve was even in the room.

No one had ever made that error again. Sam's questions indicated an understanding of mathematics that could only be seen in the context of brilliance. Sam was not boastful or arrogant, but several of the professors seemed fearful of his knowledge, while others engaged him in deep theoretical discussions.

Seeing this joy, this engagement of his gifts had made his mother happy. Sam knew that his mother still questioned his stated fervor for the Agricultural course of study he was pursuing. She knew his bliss was elsewhere, somehow involved in that strange language of mathematics, of derivatives and integrals that she didn't understand. But she was willing to accept Sam's decision to choose the path of his own life.

Today was his 19th birthday. He got out of bed and pulled on his clothes. Birthday or not, he was home and he had chores to take care of. Heading down the stairs, he found his father heading out the door as well.

"Happy Birthday, Son."

"Thanks, Dad. Why don't you stay back at the house? Let me take care of the work."

"Sam, there isn't a day goes by that I don't work. You know that."

"Yeah, but you've been putting in some long hours, Dad. While I'm home, I can take some of the slack."

"I appreciate it, Son. I really do. But this is what I know and it's what I'm going to do. I'm glad you're here to help out though. Does make things go a bit easier."

"Ok. Let's get started."

Both father and son walked out together, heading to the barn. Sam felt his father's hand on his shoulder.

Later that morning, a call had come in from Donna. He wished she was with him in person but hearing her voice was the next best thing.

"Hi, Donna."

"Happy Birthday, Sam. Did my gift arrive?"

"Uh, I don't know. Let me ask Mom." He called for his mother and she walked out of the kitchen.

"Yes, Sam?" she asked while drying her hands on her apron.

"Did anything arrive from Donna?"

Thelma nodded. "Yes, a package arrived yesterday. I have it with the rest of your presents. To open after dinner."

"Ok, Mom. Thanks." Sam turned back to the phone. "Yes, Donna. It arrived. We usually open birthday gifts after dinner, but if you want me to open it now, I can."

"No, that's ok. Tonight is fine. Just give me a call tomorrow."

"OK." Sam turned a little more to the wall, his voice a bit softer and quieter. "I miss you."

"I miss you too, Sam. Oh, and I wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed your last letter. That whole concept about tying a person's personal timeline together was fascinating. How cool would that be, to travel within your own lifetime."

"Yeah…it was an idea I've thought about since I was a kid. Don't think I'll ever be able to do anything like that though. A farm isn't exactly the best place to experience theoretical physics research."

"I know. Well, I need to go. I don't think my mother will be too happy if I spend too much on phone bills this month."

"Ok, Donna. I'll write you again tonight. And I'll call you tomorrow."

"All right. Bye, Sam. Have a wonderful birthday."

Sam hung up the phone, a grin on his face. Katie came down the stairs.

"Sam, you look like a puppy-dog with that face."

Pulled out of his reverie, Sam answered with a confused, "Huh?" Then he realized what Katie had said. "Oh. No I don't."

Katie continued on, a teasing lilt to her voice. "Yes you do, like a love-sick puppy-dog."

"Yeah, well, at least I don't have my room plastered with all the latest pictures from Seventeen magazine like you do."

"Sam, most of those pictures are of guys. It would be pretty silly if you had them on your walls." Katie gave him a wicked grin.

"You know what I mean, Katie."

Thelma stepped in. "Truce, you two. Katie, this is your brother's birthday. Give him a break."

"Ok, Mom. Sam knows I'm just kidding around." Katie came up to Sam and gave him a hug. "Happy birthday, Sam."

Hugging her back he responded, "Thanks."

The rest of the day was just like any other day on the farm. There were still chores to do but Katie and Sam did manage to play a game of Horse under the basketball hoop. That night, Thelma made Sam's favorite meal for his birthday dinner. They had biscuits with homemade jam, mashed potatoes, fried chicken, peas, peach cobbler, and milk.

After dinner, Sam opened his presents, receiving the usual type of gifts from his family, a sweater from his folks and the Moody Blues Seventh Sojourn album from Katie. When he opened Donna's gift though, he was thrilled to find a framed picture of her for his room and a smaller picture for his wallet. He had asked for both in one of his letters.

"She's a beautiful girl, Sam," his father had commented.

"Yeah," answered Sam, as he put Donna's picture into his wallet. "Yeah, she's pretty special."

The rest of the evening was spent playing a game of Clue. Katie won when she figured out it was Col. Mustard in the Library with a rope. They all turned in after that.

Sam placed the picture of Donna on his nightstand. As Sam lay down before turning off the light, he gazed on Donnas smiling face and sighed contentedly. Sam felt that nothing could take away the joy he felt that very moment. He went to sleep dreaming of Donna.


	10. August 10, 1972

The Road Not Taken: Another Path

Chapter 10

August 10, 1972

Sam was up early, tending to the cows and the other animals. He figured that giving his Dad a break before he headed back to school would be a nice gesture, even though his Dad said he was up to the task. Sam was enjoying these last weeks of summer. Things definitely were looking up. Donna was the best thing that could have happened to him. She was so wonderful to talk with. He had called her yesterday and thanked her for the pictures. He told her that he felt if he couldn't be with her, at least seeing her face would allow him to feel closer to her.

His Dad had complained at breakfast about feeling a little short of breath and having a bad case of indigestion. Had Sam known what these symptoms portended, he would have been watching his father closer. As it was, accepting John's explanation that he had eaten his breakfast too fast, Sam'd gone on to doing chores without thinking about anything except his upcoming school plans.

His Dad had headed out to the fields as usual, concerned about the current low rainfall and its effect on the corn. If Sam hadn't just happened to glance out to the fields he wouldn't have even seen his father fall between the rows of corn. It was only his quick action, running to his dad and performing CPR that led to John Beckett getting the help he needed to save his life. As soon as Sam was sure there was a heartbeat, he picked up his father to get him back to the house. John Beckett was not a small man to carry but with the athletic conditioning from basketball combined with the adrenaline rush, Sam somehow managed. Later he would not be able to recall how.

"Mom!" Sam had cried as he had rushed from the cornfield, "Call the ambulance."

Thelma had immediately gone to the phone and called 911, not exactly sure what the emergency was but sure Sam would only ask for an ambulance if it were truly necessary. A few minutes later, Thelma Beckett had come to the door and saw Sam carrying the love of her life up to the house.

"Oh Lord, John!" Thelma cried, rushing towards him. "What happened, Sam?"

"I saw Dad fall in the corn. It's his heart. I gave him CPR but I think we need the paramedics here."

"I've called them, Sam. They're on the way."

Sam made his way into the living room, placing his father on the sofa. John Beckett moaned as Sam let him go. Thelma came to his side holding his hand. "Oh, John. Hang on, the paramedics will be here soon." Her countenance provided no doubt about her level of concern. She was worried, big time.

The ambulance arrived only 10 minutes after Thelma had made the call, but somehow it seemed like an eternity to Thelma and Sam. The paramedics went right to work, checking John's vital signs and placing him onto the gurney to take him to the ambulance. They said it was against the rules for family to travel with the injured party so Sam and Thelma drove to the hospital.

When they arrived, they found that John had suffered an additional cardiac arrest while in the ambulance. The Emergency Room doctor had immediately called in the cardiologist who decided that John would require emergency surgery. He was in the operating theatre for three hours, during which time Sam did his best to stay strong for his mother.

They had called over to Sarah's house from the hospital to let Katie know where they were. Mrs. Thomas had agreed to drive Katie to the hospital so she could be with her family.

When the doctor came out of surgery, his face was grim. He pulled the family into an alcove where a TV was blasting away. He turned down the dial so that it would no longer make noise. As he was preparing to say something to the Beckett family, another group started towards the alcove, apparently to watch the TV. If looks could kill, the one the doctor gave them would have filled the morgue. The other group left, planning on finding something else to do while visiting the hospital. Once the doctor had everyone seated he began.

"Mrs. Beckett"

"Call me Thelma. These are John's and my children - Sam and Katie."

"I wish we could have met on better circumstances, but…"

"Yes."

"Well, let me get right to it. Your husband has suffered a massive heart attack. It is amazing that he lived. I understand you gave him CPR, Sam."

"Yeah. Everyone on the team has to know the procedure."

"That's most likely what saved his life."

"Thank God."

"Yes. Thank God indeed. Mr. Beckett was on death's door when he came in but we were able to do a triple bypass. He is currently in critical but stable condition."

"When can I see him?" asked Thelma, eyes bright with tears.

"Soon. But first, I want to give you the prognosis. Your husband is likely to be a semi-invalid. He'll have to take it much easier."

Sam looked at the doctor in shock. "What do you mean semi-invalid?"

The doctor looked at Sam. "I mean he can not do the type of farm-work he has been used to. He will need to reduce his workload considerably. For the first month, he can lift no more than 8 pounds. Afterwards, he'll have to follow a more aerobic exercise program but nothing too strenuous. Walking would be best. His diet will have to change as well."

The doctor looked towards Thelma. "Does your husband smoke?"

"Yes."

"He'll have to stop that as well."

"John won't like hearing any of this."

The doctor looked at the Beckett family. "It doesn't matter if he likes hearing it or not. If Mr. Beckett does not change his habits, the next time his heart will give out. He's lucky to be alive. With as much damage as his heart has, any time he has left is dependent on the changes he can make."

**XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXo**

The doctor had left the family in the alcove. Sam had stated that he should leave college, but Thelma had insisted that there would be another way. She had not told John, but had taken out a policy to help out under this situation. They would have some money to hire a helper for John, someone who could do the heavy work. After about an hour, the nurse had found them to tell them that John was awake. The family walked back to the ICU.

The doctor was in the room and was obviously catching hell from John Beckett.

"What do you mean I have to take it easy? I run a dairy farm, for God's sake. Easy doesn't come with the territory."

"Sir, you required a triple bypass and much of your heart is greatly damaged and weakened. If you go back to business as usual, you'll have another heart attack, one which I doubt you'd be able to survive."

"Dad," said Sam softly. "We can hire someone to do the heavy work. You'd still be able to run the farm. Just with some help."

"We can't afford that, Sam."

"Yes, we can. Mom was worried something like this might happen. You know that Grandpa died young. She's made sure there is money to hire someone."

"Yes, Sam. I know when my father died. After he passed on, my brothers and I took care of that farm. I was 13 when that occurred. James and Benjamin both decided not to pursue farming as a career, but farming is my life. This little heart thing isn't going to slow me down."

"Dad, you have to take care of _yourself_. What will Mom and Katie do if you're gone?"

"You can come home, Sam."

Thelma spoke up. "No, John. Sam needs to finish school."

John looked at Thelma. He knew how much stock she placed in school, in education. He knew this was unlikely to be a battle he would win. "I don't think this is a good idea, Thelma." He looked to Sam. "Son, go ahead and see if you can find someone who can work with me on the farm. I won't take someone on who's not willing to put in a full days work though."

"Yessir. Dad. You'll see. It will work out ok."

"I hope so, Sam. I hope so."

**XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXo**

Ezra Michaels was a good solid, Indiana farm laborer. He was married and had a daughter aged 2 ½ years old. He was willing to take a portion of his wages in rent for the small house on the farm, the one that the Katie had often used for her playhouse. Sam felt sure that Ezra would meet his father's expectations.

Ezra had worked on a dairy farm all of his life. His own family's farm had failed about 10 years before and he had hired himself out since then. All of the references that Sam had received were positive. His last position was on a farm that had been foreclosed on a month before and Ezra was concerned about his limited savings keeping his family afloat. The Beckett's offer was fair and reasonable and the house would be a great bonus.

When John Beckett had been released from the hospital a week after surgery, Ezra had met with him. John had talked with him at length about how he liked to run his farm. He had reminded Ezra of his own father, a definite passion for his life's blood. After Ezra's family's farm had failed, his father had gone downhill rather quickly, dying way too young. He understood how deep farming ran in John Beckett's blood.

Ezra wasn't sure why John's son, Sam, would not be coming back to the farm right away, but then again, if he did; the job and the house wouldn't be there for Ezra. He decided that if the Beckett's would have him, he'd do the best job he could. At least Jane and Clara would have a roof over their heads.

By mid-August, things were set and the Michaels had moved in. The Beckett farm would continue.


	11. September 5, 1972

The Road Not Taken: Another Path

Chapter 11

September 5, 1972

After Ezra had been hired, Sam had spent the next couple of weeks showing him the "ropes" of the farm. Ezra had taken to the job quickly, stating that the way the Beckett's ran their farm wasn't much different than the way his father had. Well, except for the organic techniques. Even after Sam had explained that by doing things organically, the amount they could reasonably charge increased significantly, Ezra was skeptical. However, he figured that if that was the way his employers wanted him to handle things, well, they were the boss.

Sam had initially felt sad, leaving the farm and returning to Purdue. After a few days, though, he started feeling a bit better. He was taking the coursework necessary for the Agriculture degree but having passed several CLEP tests, he had the schedule freedom to take a couple of electives that were to his liking. He was taking Modern Physics and Advanced Differential Equations. Spending time with Donna discussing their thoughts on these subjects had re-sparked Sam's interests. Maybe he wasn't going to have a practical purpose to use this knowledge, but it did make him happy.

This year Pete had decided to pledge at a fraternity, Phi Delta Theta, so Sam would be getting a new roommate. He'd been told that Ryan Leander was a Computer Science major. He was looking forward to meeting him. However, he needed to go to the Judo class with Pete and couldn't wait around.

"Hi, Sam. How was your summer?" Pete asked when he saw him.

Sam thought a moment. "Well, it was both the best summer ever and the worst."

Pete looked at Sam, showing concern. "What do you mean?"

"Which do you want to hear about first?"

"Tell me the worst part first. That way, you can tell me the great part and you'll end on a positive."

Sam sighed. "My Dad had a really severe heart attack. The doctor said he'll be a semi-invalid."

Pete's face fell. "Oh, man. I'm so sorry. Is there anything I can do?"

Sam looked at his friend, showing his gratitude. "Pete, your just being here is enough. It's nice to have a friend I can talk to."

"How is this going to affect your farm?" Pete recognized the difficulties that would arise. He was concerned that Sam would be called back home.

"We hired a man to help Dad out. He's got a family to take care of so the job is good for him. And he knows dairy farming. I think he'll be a real help to my dad."

"So you're not leaving school?"

Sam smiled. "No. I offered but my mother wouldn't hear of it. She convinced Dad this was the best choice. She wants me to finish college. I think that everything will work out in the long run."

Pete nodded. "Glad you'll be able to stay in school. So, is that the good news?"

Sam shook his head and took out his wallet. "Well, it is a good thing to stay in school, but something really wonderful happened this summer." He pulled Donna's picture out and handed it to Pete, saying, "She's the good news. Her name is Donna. God, she's just about the most wonderful woman in the world. She and I met in June and have been seeing and corresponding with each other all summer."

Pete took the picture in his hands and whistled. "Wow…she's a real looker." Pete looked over at Sam and said wickedly, "I wonder what she sees in you, Beckett."

Sam gave Pete an annoyed glance. "She's a physics major at Lawrence College in Marion, Ohio. We both enjoy the subject."

"Oh….okay….I get it…nerd love."

Sam was about to comment when the instructor called the class to order. He and Pete listened to and then practiced the day's new techniques. Afterwards, Pete said he had to get back to the Fraternity. His "brothers" would certainly have some "jobs" for him to do.

As Pete turned to leave he stated, "You ought to join, Sam. I'm sure they'd let you pledge too."

Sam shook his head, "No, that kind of thing isn't for me."

Pete shrugged. "Well, suit yourself. It is a lot of fun. Sometimes you need to loosen up more."

The skin around Sam's eyes crinkled just a bit as he threw Pete a smile. "I'll think about it, okay?"

"Okay. Bye."

Sam walked back to the dorm. When he walked into the room, he found that the other side of the room had been filled with the items that announced the presence of his new roommate. He checked out the bookshelf and found quite a few books on computers and the collection of the novelizations of the Star Trek series, along with the book "The Physics of Star Trek." He turned as he heard the door open behind him.

"Hi. You must be Ryan."

"Yeah." Ryan held up his right hand with his palm facing Sam and the ring and middle finger forming a "V." "Live long and prosper."

Sam smiled, "You take this Star Trek stuff pretty seriously."

"I do. It had to be the best show ever and they killed it after only three seasons. Roddenberry was a flipping genius."

"I used to watch it too. It had some great concepts."

"Yeah. The networks should have continued the series. It was intelligent and they tackled a lot of important issues."

"Where are you from, Ryan?"

"I grew up in Jeffersonville, across the river from Louisville, Kentucky. Where are you from?"

"My family has a farm in Elk Ridge which is fairly close to Terre Haute."

Ryan smiled. "I don't know much about farming. I love computers though. It's cool what they are doing with mainframes. It would be neat if they someday had computers like the ones on Star Trek. You know, ones that had real artificial intelligence."

"Yeah, that would be fun," said Sam, nodding.

"Hey. Do you know when they show the Star Trek reruns in the area?"

"Hmmmm. I think I've seen a group watching in the student lounge at 10 p.m. on Tuesday nights"

"Today is Tuesday." It was a statement, not a question.

Sam grinned, "Yeah, it is."

"You want to go watch?"

"Okay. That might be fun."

Ryan finished putting his things away and the two went off to grab some dinner. They continued to talk about what had brought them to Purdue and the plans that they had for when they eventually graduated. Ryan had wondered why Sam, who seemed to understand a lot about computers, would choose to pursue a farming career. But as they said on Star Trek…Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.

When they arrived at the student lounge, they found the chairs already taken so they sat on the floor. That night's episode was _The Trouble With Tribbles._ One of the students watching wondered why the wheat in the episode was called quadrotriticale. Sam had explained that it was an extrapolation from an actual hybrid of rye and wheat that bred true under less than idea conditions. The other watchers had thought that was really cool. Sam felt that among these fans of the show, his love of science and esoteric knowledge was appreciated. It gave him a warm glow.

After the show was over, Ryan and he walked back to the dorm. They continued to talk, getting to know one another. Sam felt that he and his new roommate would definitely become good friends.


	12. November 23 to 26, 1972

The Road Not Taken: Another Path

Chapter 12

November 23-26, 1972

Sam was nervous. He knew that Donna would be arriving soon. He was waiting at the bus station to pick her up. This would be the first time for Donna to meet his folks and although he knew they would love her as he did, he was still on heightened adrenaline. He watched the bus pull into the station and watched as the people disembarked. Finally, he saw Donna walking down the stairs.

"Donna, I'm so glad you're here!" Donna walked over to Sam and he hugged her. "I take it you have luggage for us to pick up.

Donna nodded. "Yes, I have both a small suitcase and my cosmetic bag."

As they waited for the luggage to be unloaded, Sam asked Donna about her trip. "It was okay. I don't really like buses but there aren't many other ways to get any place in rural Indiana."

"Yeah, we are sort of out in the boonies. However, it's quiet around here and there aren't problems with crime like you find in a lot of the cities."

"I suppose. Growing up in San Francisco, I'm used to the city. I've never really spent a lot of time in a rural community."

Donna indicated to Sam her bags and he picked them up and carried them to the pick-up truck, putting them in the back. He opened the door for Donna and helped her step into the cab. Then he walked around and climbed behind the wheel. He started up the truck and he pulled onto Main Street, heading out of town.

"How far is it to your farm?"

"We'll get there in about 15 minutes."

"I'm looking forward to meeting your family."

Sam smiled, "And they are looking forward to meeting you."

They continued to talk as they left the town and drove along the county roads. Donna noted that she didn't see any houses, but Sam pointed out that most of the farmhouses were set back quite a bit from the road. After that, Donna started noticing the homes. A few minutes later, Sam pulled off the road onto a long drive. Soon, his home came into view.

"Wow! That's a pretty good size home. How old is it?

"My great-grandfather built the house after the Civil War. He and my great-grandmother had moved to Indiana. The farm has been in the family since then."

"That's quite a long time."

"Yeah. That's why I went into agriculture. I want to help my dad with the farm. Keep it in the family for another generation or more."

They pulled up and parked in the driveway. Sam got out and opened the door for Donna, helping her down. He took the luggage out of the back and carried them up the steps to the house. Thelma Beckett walked out of the front door. "Good afternoon. I'm Thelma. You must be Donna. We're all so happy you've decided to spend Thanksgiving with us."

Donna shook hands with Thelma. "It's nice to meet you, Ma'am."

They entered the house and chit-chatted for a bit but then Thelma suggested that Sam show Donna her room. Sam took Donna's luggage upstairs to the guest room, which had been Katie's before she took Tom's old room. "You probably want to freshen up a bit after your bus ride."

"Yes, that would be nice."

"Um…we usually have dinner about five'o'clock. It's four now so that will give you time to get ready."

Donna looked confused. "Ready? I just want to wash up a bit, but I wasn't planning on doing much more. I don't think I'll need an hour."

Sam looked at Donna's outfit. Since she'd been traveling on the bus, she'd chosen to wear a pants suit that while neat wasn't quite what his family was used to wearing for holidays. He knew his mother and Katie would be wearing their Sunday best and he and his Dad would be in suits. That was just the way they always dressed for Thanksgiving. He had assumed that Donna's family practiced the same so hadn't mentioned it before. He was a bit fidgety as he said, "Uh, Donna? Did you bring a dress?"

Donna nodded. "Yes, I brought one for Church on Sunday."

Sam looked at her looking rather chagrined. "You might want to wear it tonight then. We sort of dress for dinner on holidays."

"Thanks for telling me. I guess I might need that hour after all."

"Okay. Sorry for not letting you know sooner."

"That's okay. It's just a little different for me."

Sam left her to get ready and checked with his mother to see if she needed any help with the dinner before getting ready himself. She asked him to set the table with the good silverware and to put out the cut-glass water and wine glasses. After he had completed this, he headed to his room.

He had finished and was heading down the stairs when the door to Donna's room opened. She was wearing a light blue dress with a lace bodice. She was beautiful as always. Sam commented on how becoming the dress was and they walked down together, entering the dining room.

Donna stopped for a moment and gazed into the room. The table setting was lovely, with a centerpiece of fall colored mums. This was much fancier than she was used to even for Thanksgiving. Donna was introduced to John and Katie Beckett.

"It's very nice to meet you. Welcome to our home," said John.

"Yes. It's about time Sam brought someone home," Katie said without thinking.

Sam blushed. "Katie!"

"You know what I mean, Sam. You've never brought any girl to dinner at the house before."

Sam felt like he could sink into the floorboards, but Donna just smiled. "I'm very glad to finally meet Sam's family. Thank you for having me."

They all sat down. John Beckett cleared his throat and everyone bowed their heads. "Lord, we ask your blessing for all at this table. We are thankful to be together as a family and to have Donna with us as well. Bless this food to our use and us to thy service. Amen."

They all answered with an affirming Amen and the dinner commenced. Dinner conversation covered a variety of topics including talk about future plans. Donna found the mood to be relaxed even with the somewhat fancy level of dress. She truly enjoyed interacting with Sam's family, finding them to be honest and kind people. Being an only child herself, she found that the kidding that transpired between Sam and Katie to be loving, and wished that she could have had a sibling relationship like they did.

"Would you like more of anything, Donna?" Thelma asked.

"Oh no, ma'am. I couldn't eat another bite. The food was so good."

"Thank you. We'll be having dessert a bit later. I hope you like pumpkin pie."

"Oh yes. It wouldn't be Thanksgiving without it," Donna affirmed.

Sam offered to help his mother clear the table and Donna indicated that she could help as well.

"No, you two go into the parlor with John. Sam, Katie can help me. You stay with Donna."

Katie readily agreed, helping her mother clear the table and clean up while Donna continued to get to know John Beckett.

"I understand that you've lived your whole life on the farm."

"Yes, other than the two years I spent in the Army during World War II, I've always lived here in Elk Ridge."

"How did you meet Thelma?"

"She was giving out donuts and coffee for the USO. We talked and she agreed to let me correspond with her. I've got to admit, her letters really helped me through some difficult times. War is hell."

Donna nodded and John went on.

"When I came back, I felt like I knew Thelma. I asked her to marry me and she agreed. We've been together for 28 years now."

"That is quite some time."

"How about your family, Donna?" John asked.

"My folks divorced when I was ten years old. I've lived with my mother since then."

"What about your father?"

Donna looked a bit uncomfortable. "Uh…well, I never saw my father again. He was in the army. He might still be."

Noticing Donna's discomfort, Sam turned the conversation to discussing the latest space mission. A bit later, Thelma and Katie joined the group and they pulled out a Scrabble game and played until it was time to go to bed. However there was time for the pumpkin pie as well which Donna lavished praise upon, indicating she'd never tasted a pie so good. About 10:00 p.m., Thelma, John, and Katie excused themselves and went upstairs to go to bed.

Sam asked Donna if she'd like some herbal tea before going to bed. She answered in the affirmative and Sam headed into the kitchen to put on the water. Donna followed him into the kitchen. They sat at the table. "I really enjoyed tonight, Sam. Thank you for inviting me."

Sam smiled. "You fit in well, Donna."

"It must be nice to have a little sister. I wish I'd had a sister. Or a brother even."

"I had both. Tom was older than me."

"Tom? Where is he?"

Sam's face clouded for a moment as he remembered the Thanksgiving three years before. _God, I miss Tom!_ "He died in Vietnam in April of 1970."

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Sam. I didn't know."

"Um…I don't really talk about it a lot. Tom and I were close. I miss him."

"I've never had any siblings but I've seen friends who have. I'm sure it was hard."

The kettle sounded a whistle and Sam got up to pour the water into the mugs with the herbal teabags. "It was." He brought the mugs over to the table. "If Tom were still alive, I'd have gone to MIT instead of Purdue. That's what he wanted me to do."

"MIT?" Donna sounded intrigued.

"Yeah. I was offered a scholarship there. I decided to take the one at Purdue instead though so I could help dad with the farm." Sam took a sip of the tea.

"You had the opportunity to study at MIT and turned it down! Sam, I would have jumped at the chance to go there!"

"Well, I thought about it but decided my family was more important than some dream about observing time."

"I think it would have been a better choice to go to MIT, Sam."

"That's because you're a physics major, Donna."

"No, it's because I know you have a natural affinity for the subject. Just think what you may have accomplished."

"Well, what's past is past."

"I guess."

They continued to talk until they finished their tea. Then Sam walked with Donna back up the stairs. He gave her a light kiss and watched as she entered the room, yawning. He walked to his room and got ready for bed. He crawled between the covers and was asleep almost as soon as his head hit the pillow.

**XoXoXoXoXoXo**

The next day was bright and clear. Sam still had to do chores, so Donna followed him about, asking questions about what he did. Sam was happy to explain it to her. After lunch, Sam asked Donna what she would like to do.

"What is there to do around here?"

"Well, we could go for a walk or go into town."

"What is there to do in town?"

"Um, well, we could go to a movie."

"What's playing?"

"_What's Up Doc_. It's a comedy. Barbara Streisand and Ryan O'Neill."

"I've already seen that. What else is playing?"

"Oh, that's it. Only one movie at a time." Sam was running out of Elk Ridge activities. "We could drive into Terre Haute. They have a bigger movie complex there."

"How far is that?"

"Oh, about 40 minutes or so."

"What's showing there?"

Sam checked the newspaper. "The musical _Man of La Mancha_ has come out in a movie. Stars Peter O'Toole and Sophia Loren. I wouldn't mind going to see that. We could go to dinner there as well."

"Yeah. That sounds good."

Sam called and made reservations for dinner. They decided that they'd go to the late afternoon show and then have dinner at a nice Italian place.

They arrived a bit early for the movie. As they sat in the theatre, awaiting the inevitable previews, Donna brought up the topic that Sam had so casually mentioned the night before.

"Sam, you said you were offered a full scholarship at MIT, right?"

"Yeah."

"Well, if you'd gone there, wouldn't you have been able to hire someone to help your father on the farm. Like the hired hand you have now?"

"Well, I guess that would have been a possibility. But ultimately, if you're gonna farm, you need to be there. Ezra won't be around forever."

The lights dimmed and the screen lit up. The previews had started. Sam and Donna fell silent.

They both thoroughly enjoyed the movie. Sam was especially taken with the words to "The Quest" but was moved as well by the song "Dulcinea."

During dinner they continued to discuss the show and their upcoming plans for Christmas. Donna and her mother were going to Hawaii. Sam said he'd be back at home again. Sam broached the next day's activities. "I was thinking we could go up to Cecil Harden Lake. Maybe do a little hiking."

"That sounds nice Sam."

When they arrived back at the Beckett homestead, Sam mentioned to his mother the idea he had for going hiking. "You'll need something to eat. How about some turkey sandwiches and some apples?"

"That sounds nice, Mom."

She pulled out the old picnic basket and put it together. "Don't forget to pull the sandwiches out of the fridge tomorrow before."

"Okay."

Donna tried to stifle a yawn. Sam was concerned. "You look tired, Donna. Why don't you turn in? I think I'll do so myself."

"What time are you getting up, Sam."

"Donna, don't worry about that. I get up really early. You can certainly sleep late. You saw what I do every morning today anyway."

"Ok, Sam." They walked up the stairs together. Sam gave Donna a kiss before walking on down the hall to his room.

Right before he walked from the hallway into his room, he turned and saw her looking towards him. He smiled. "Goodnight, Donna."

She smiled back as well. "Goodnight, Sam."

**XoXoXoXoXoXo**

The next day, Donna took Sam's suggestion and slept late. When she went down to the kitchen to get some coffee, Sam was reading a book, Brigadoon. He was wearing a green sweater with a plaid shirt and jeans.

"Already finished with all those chores?"

"Oh yeah. Finished about two hours ago."

"What time did you get up?"

Sam thought for a moment. "I guess it was about five a.m."

Donna's eyebrows rose but she said nothing. She walked over to the window. "Did it rain?"

"A little. Just a sprinkle. Should still be okay for the hike. You still want to go?"

"Yeah. Let me go get ready."

"Okay. I'm just going to read this some more. I love this book. Have since the first time I read it."

Donna looked at him, confused. "You're reading it again? I thought you remember everything you read."

Sam looked at her and smiled. "I do. But with things I really like, I read them over again. It's like meeting an old friend."

Donna went back upstairs, showered and dressed. When she came down she was wearing a red wool sweater with a white cotton turtleneck beneath it, jeans, and hiking boots. She carried a light jacket with her as well. "Sam, I'm ready to go whenever you are."

"Let me get my hiking boots on and we'll leave." It took him a few minutes to put on his boots and afterwards he went to the hall closet and retrieved a rather substantial but sporty coat. Sam retrieved their sandwiches and apples and put them in the picnic basket his mother had packed. He took these out to the car, along with a thermos of hot tea which he had filled earlier. He came back into the house, scooped a small daypack he'd left by the door along with a Nalgene bottle of water. Now thoroughly outfitted, they headed out to Cecil Harden Lake, also known as Raccoon Lake.

When they reached their destination, they checked at the visitor's center and obtained a map of the area. Choosing a hiking trail, they drove to the trailhead. They left the picnic basket in the car and headed off down the trail. As they walked along the well trod path, there were times when they could see Raccoon Lake and other times that the curtain of trees obscured the water. They saw evidence of wildlife including deer, ducks, and Canadian geese. Finishing the loop, they headed back to the car, claiming a nearby picnic table where they could eat their lunch. Sam retrieved the picnic basket and carried it over to the table where Donna was sitting. Sam had started to take the sandwiches out of the basket when he noticed she was shivering.

"You're cold." It was said as a statement rather than a question. He'd seen the weather report and knew the high would only be about 45 degrees on the Fahrenheit scale today. The rain hadn't helped warm the day either.

"A little," she admitted.

"Here." He took off his coat and wrapped it around Donna.

"Now you'll be cold."

"I'm used to it here, Donna."

"Yeah, but you're also used to wearing a coat."

He couldn't argue with her there. "Well, we can always eat in the car."

"Okay."

He repacked the sandwiches and they headed to the car. He put the picnic basket on the back seat. After getting in, Sam noted that Donna was still shivering a bit. "Come here, let me hold you closer."

Donna snuggled into Sam. He felt so warm, like a personal heater. She pulled closer. He put his arm around her. As she looked up at him, he felt a stirring in his heart. He reached his hand to cup her head, pulling her lips towards his. She did not resist, but rather he felt her lips seeking his as well. Encouraged, he kissed her more passionately. He felt her lips open, inviting him to kiss her more deeply. He accepted that invitation.

As he kissed her, Sam removed the coat from Donna's shoulders. His hand reached down, gliding along her side, brushing up against her breast. Even through her clothing, Donna felt the gentleness of his touch. A slight moan issued from her; her kiss became more urgent. Sam broke away for a moment, looking into her eyes, a question in them asking her if she really wished to go on. He would never take from her what she wouldn't give freely. She didn't answer in words but instead pulled him closer to her. She hungrily kissed his face, his neck, and his lips.

His hand tentatively reached under her sweater. That was when Sam realized why Donna had gotten so cold. Her turtleneck was only a dickey. He'd thought she'd had on multiple layers but under her sweater she had only her bra. Sam's hand slipped beneath it. He could feel her nipple, hard beneath his fingers. As he massaged her breast his lips traveled down her neck and back up to her ear. He whispered to her, a deep huskiness present as he voiced his feelings. "I love you, Donna." She arched, providing greater access to her upper body, silently begging him to continue touching her. She moaned again. "Oh, Sam." Her voice was soft, and the sound drove him to distraction.

Although they had sought the car due to the chilliness outside, they both had become rather warm. They removed their sweaters. Donna's bra hooked in the front and he released the clasp, freeing her breasts from their constraint. They were taut and his lips sought them out, kissing them gently. He kissed each in turn, the tip of his tongue gliding upon them, encircling the hard nipples, savoring the taste of her. He kissed them again and then suddenly, he pulled away.

His eyes were closed and he seemed to be drawing from an inner source of strength. His neck muscles were tensed. "I think we'd better stop."

Donna was confused. "Why?"

Sam's eyes opened and he looked into Donna's, his soul streaming forth from their green depths. "Because if I don't stop now, I don't think I'd be able to later."

"What if I don't want you to stop?" she asked.

An almost pained sound left Sam's lips. He softly stated, "Donna, it wouldn't be right."

A slight pout was in Donna's voice as she asked. "Don't you want me, Sam?"

A sharp breath escaped him. "Want you, Donna? Oh God yes, I want you so bad it hurts. But it would be wrong to go on now. I can't do that to you." He said the words again, deep emotions flowing out in his voice. "I love you."

He reached down and handed her bra to her. She took it from him. Part of her was sorry that he'd stopped but another part of her was grateful. She didn't know if she would have been able to keep from going on. The pleasure she had been feeling had set her on fire. His lips and fingers gently touching her. She nodded.

As she continued to get dressed, she looked over to him. Sam was focusing inwardly. Donna knew he followed martial arts and she could see the meditative state in his demeanor. She understood that Sam was a man of great passion, but that he would never take advantage of another person's weakness. It was just not in his nature to do so.

After a few minutes, Sam opened his eyes. He gave her a slight lop sided grin. "How about those sandwiches? I'm ready for one."

"All right."

He turned and reached over the seat, opening the picnic basket and pulling out a couple of sandwiches and the apples. After handing one of each to her, he reached back again and brought the thermos up as well, along with two mugs. He poured out the liquid into the mugs and handed one to her. As they began to eat, Sam commented on the birds they had seen on the lake. Donna knew he was drawing further away from their encounter, attempting to insert a safe distance between them. She followed along. When they finished the food, Sam took all the sandwich wrappings and took them over to the trash. He got back in the car and leaned over, giving her a kiss on the cheek. Then he started the car and they drove back to the Beckett farmhouse, their conversation continuing on rather mundane things.

That night, Thelma had made a pot of chili and homemade cornbread. Donna again enjoyed the camaraderie of the Beckett's dinner table. It felt so comfortable. After dinner, she had packed her bags, knowing that as soon as church was over the next morning, she would need to head to the bus station. Her bus back to Lawrence left at noon.

She went to sleep thinking of the weekend's events. Sam had told her he loved her and she had no doubt that he did. She, on the other hand, was unsure of how she felt. Part of her wanted to be with Sam always and forever. Part of her was afraid to give her heart to him, to trust that he would cherish it and not break it one day. She knew she would have to think this through.

The next day, she'd accompanied the family to their church and Sam had taken her to the station to catch her bus. He had kissed her deeply again just before she boarded the bus. She could feel the passion in his kiss, the longing he had for her. As the bus pulled away she waved to Sam, blowing a kiss his way. He'd acted as if he'd caught it in his hand and then held that hand to his chest, as if saving her kiss in his heart. Donna had smiled.

As the bus left Elk Ridge in the distance, Donna closed her eyes, remembering the weekend. The final thing that stayed in her mind was the sound of Sam's voice as he sang the old hymns during the church service. His voice was beautiful, deep and baritone and there were times when she was sure that his notes hit the rafters of the church, soaring heavenward. It was a memory she knew she would treasure to the end of her days.


	13. March 3, 1973

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 13

March 3, 1973

Sam exited the locker room and walked towards the almost empty auditorium where he knew Donna would be awaiting him. He'd been happy she'd been able to plan the trip to the home game at Purdue to coincide with her trip to Chicago, where she was presenting a poster at a regional physics meeting. West Lafayette was about two hours south of Chicago so it wasn't too difficult to drive up early to the Windy City on a Saturday. It had felt nice tonight, knowing she was out in the crowd, cheering for him. Too bad Purdue lost the game. But the Minnesota Gophers had wanted the win too much, ultimately succeeding by 13 points. As he came around the corner, he saw Donna. She knew that the loss would be bothering Sam.

"Sam, better luck next time. You guys gave it your all though."

He shook his head, indicating he didn't agree. "If that were the case, we would have won." Donna noticed as his head shook it was still rather damp. He'd come out of the locker room as quickly as he could not wanting to leave Donna alone for any more time than was necessary.

"You know its a little cold out there tonight. Don't you think you should dry your hair a bit more?"

Sam shook his head. "Nah, it will be okay. It's almost dry. I can't tell you how many times I had to walk home from school with a wet head so I could get back to take care of the cows. Can't let the animals wait too long for your own comfort."

"I guess."

Suddenly Sam changed the subject. "Donna, you won't believe what I got in the mail today."

"What, Sam?"

"A letter from The New Artist's Group. They want me to play as a guest artist at Carnegie Hall during this summer's Upcoming Artists Series. My music professor, Dr. Martin, sent in a cassette for them to listen to. I hadn't known he was going to do that, but I guess it was good he did." Sam pulled the letter out of the outer pocket of his bag and handed it to Donna, who took it and started scanning it.

"Wow! This is quite an accomplishment. I knew you played piano, but Carnegie Hall!"

They started walking to the exit but Sam continued, "I love music! Playing sometimes makes me feel closer to the universe, you know? It's like hearing the fabric of reality and seeing the diversity in everything."

Donna stopped walking. Sam also stopped and turned, looking at her quizzically; she stood on her tiptoes and kissed him on the lips. "What was that for?"

"You're such a romantic, Sam Beckett. You should have been a poet."

Sam guffawed. "I hate English Lit, remember? Why would I want to add to that? Anyways, I'm not very good at expressing myself sometimes."

Donna shook her head as she started walking again. "Sam, you are just fine at expressing yourself."

"With you, maybe. With other people, I don't always connect."

They had reached the door and Sam held it open for Donna. They headed to a local restaurant that was close to the campus. Sam was originally planning to travel with Donna the next day up to Chicago to attend her conference session, but the coach had called another practice. Even though the season was getting close to the end, they still had a chance to finish it well.

They walked into the local hangout and found they'd have a little wait. The establishment was one that was frequented after a home game and lots of the Boilermaker fans had already arrived. They were just about to go into the bar to wait their turn when Pete Fisk waved them over.

"Hey, you guys. We have enough room for two more if you want to join us." Pete was sitting at a table for six, but only four chairs were taken. They obviously hadn't ordered yet as there were no glasses at the table. Pete had his girlfriend, Amy, with him and another couple that Sam didn't recognize.

Sam looked over at Donna, allowing her to make the call. "It's okay with me, Sam. I'm a bit hungry. I didn't eat much earlier." That settled it. They let the hostess know that they would be joining their friends.

Pete started to make introductions. "Theresa Connors and Bob Starr, I'd like you to meet Donna…" Pete started to blush. "Uh…I know your first name but not your last."

Donna smiled. "It's Elesee."

Pete grinned gratefully and continued with the introductions, "…Donna Elesee and Sam Beckett."

"Nice to meet you," both couples simultaneously said, laughing at the chorus nature of the response.

Pete decided he needed to provide some context to the introductions. "Bob, Sam was my roommate my first year here, before I decided to join the fraternity. Sam, Bob's a fraternity brother. He's taking Chemical Engineering and is graduating this year."

"Where are you from, Bob?"

"I've lived here in the Chicago area most of my life. Theresa and I have been dating since high school. We plan to get married after graduation. Amy will be Theresa's maid of honor."

"Congratulations to both of you."

Bob grinned. "What about you, Donna?"

"I'm a physics major over at Lawrence in Marion, Ohio."

"Marion's not exactly the next town over. Did you and Sam know each other from before?"

"No, one of his teammates, George Fetzer, introduced us. He's from Marion." Donna went on to explain that this trip combined both seeing Sam and the conference.

"I was planning on heading up to Chicago tomorrow for that. I have a friend who's also presenting. Maybe I'll see you there."

Their waitress, having a full house to deal with finally came to the table and got drink and appetizer orders. A few minutes later, she was back with the beers, sodas, waters, and chicken wings. They all quickly ordered their main meals, consisting mainly of burgers and fries.

As they ate, the conversation evolved through the evening, covering school activities, Bob and Theresa's upcoming wedding plans, the game and how they would win the next time, and what everyone was planning to do after graduation. Bob indicated that he would be working for a petroleum refiner in the Chicago area. Neither he nor Theresa wanted to move far from their families. Amy was obtaining her teaching degree. She planned to teach at the primary school level but where she taught wasn't really an issue for her. Sam figured that she and Pete would get married and go back to Pete's family farm but didn't say anything. Donna indicated her desire to continue research in Quantum physics. Sam and Pete both indicated a desire to keep working on their respective family farms.

They had a great evening and left the restaurant a little after eleven. Donna indicated that she was a bit tired and asked Sam to take her back to her hotel. He walked her to her room.

"Would you like to come in, Sam?" asked Donna as she used her key to open the door.

"Uh…no, Donna. You're going to need to be up early to get to Chicago and I've got practice tomorrow."

"You're probably right."

Sam took her into his arms. "I'm sure glad you came to the game tonight." He looked into her eyes. They both moved their heads to the right angle for a kiss. As he held her, Sam could feel his body responding to her as she moved in closer to him. Sam wanted to hold her forever, savoring her lips, breathing her in.

"You can still come in, Sam," whispered Donna.

He wanted to. He wanted to be with Donna but it wasn't right. He knew he was in love with her and waiting, even though it was the most difficult thing to do, was what he'd always believed to be the right thing to do.

His voice betrayed his emotions, through, as he answered "No, Donna. I can't." He gave her one last kiss and then pulled away. "Goodnight. I'll see you tomorrow night."

Donna was a bit breathless herself. She knew that Sam's refusal wasn't because he didn't want to be with her, but because he did. There were times that part of her wished he didn't have such a deeply rooted "boy scout" attitude. _But then would I love him as much?_ "Okay. I'll call you after the session tomorrow night." She then slipped into her room.

Sam watched the door close. He hesitated for a second, but then turned away and called the elevator. His body was wrapped tighter than a steel cable. He so wished to be with Donna. _One day. It will happen one day._ Sam comforted himself with that thought as he went out to his car and drove back to the campus.

XoXoXoXoXo

The practice was going smoothly. The coach had introduced them to some new drills and they had performed them well. They had reached the time for scrimmaging and the team broke into two opposing groups.

Sam jumped up to make a basket; but as he came down, he landed wrong and his leg twisted awkwardly. Sam hit the floor with a thud and he felt something pop. The pain was excruciating.

The coach ran over to his fallen player, "Tell me what hurts, Sam."

"It's my right leg, coach. I…I felt something pop as I went down."

The coach called the team doctor over. He felt Sam's leg gingerly before giving his prognosis. "It's broken, son. Let's get you to the hospital and set it. I imagine you're in some pain?" He asked the coach to call the ambulance.

Sam nodded. The doctor pulled out a vial and a hypodermic. After filling the hypodermic with the correct dosage of the medication, he gave Sam a shot of morphine. It didn't take long before the pain in his leg started subsiding.

The paramedics had arrived and put Sam onto a gurney, wheeling him out to the ambulance. This was a lousy turn of events. When Sam arrived at the emergency room at St. Elizabeth Hospital, he initially had to wait thirty minutes to be seen. The doctor ordered an X-ray. He was wheeled down a hallway and left there, being told that the X-ray technician would be out to get him soon. Apparently the call hadn't connected with the X-ray Department, though. He ended up waiting in the hallway for a solid hour before he was finally retrieved and the X-rays taken.

It turned out to be a fairly clean break and the cast was finally put on. They gave Sam lightweight metal crutches. He took a cab back to the dorm, arriving there about ten p.m. Ryan told him that Donna had called about nine p.m. asking if he was there. "I told her to try back in an hour so she should be calling back anytime. I guess you had a pretty eventful day today, huh."

"Yeah. 'Hurry up and wait.' I hate hospitals."

Ryan smiled. Although they kept the room relatively neat by college standards, Ryan made sure that the floor was cleared of obstacles. He voiced his condolences that Sam would be on crutches for a while and thus was effectively out for the rest of the basketball season. "Tough break, man."

"Yeah, in more ways than one." Sam said wryly. He looked thoughtful for a moment adding, "Then again, it will give me more time to practice piano even though it will be just about impossible to use the pedals. I'll just have to practice the fingering and work on the pedals when the cast is off." Ryan gave him a confused look, not understanding the connection. "I'm going to play at Carnegie Hall in June."

"Wow, that's pretty impressive. I knew you played, but that's awesome."

The phone rang. Ryan picked it up, answering the question he'd obviously been asked, "Yeah, he's back. Let me put him on." Ryan brought the phone over to Sam, the cord barely reaching where he was sitting.

"Hello." Sam smiled. "Hi, Donna.

"I thought you'd be back from practice sooner than this."

"Uh, practice was over a long time ago. I broke my leg. It was a freak accident, but I'm out for the rest of the season."

"Oh Sam, that's awful. Are you okay? What did the doctor say? You have to be upset about not playing for the rest of the season. Geez, you played so well last night too. I'm sure your team's going to miss you."

"Yeah, but nothing can be done. It's just a normal broken leg and I've been told I'm lucky it was a straight forward break. The doctor said it would take anywhere from six to eight weeks to heal, but enough about that. How did your poster session go?"

"It was very well received. There was quite a bit of interest in elementary particle research. Oh, before I forget, a Dr. LoNigro said to say hello."

"Dr. LoNigro was there?"

"Yeah. I told him you'd be in New York in June playing at Carnegie Hall. He said he'd try to get down there from MIT for the concert."

"It would be nice to see him again. How did he know you knew me?"

"I was talking with another presenter. She wondered why I wasn't at the mixer last night. I told her that I was at the game at Purdue, watching you play. She asked your name and when I said your name, Dr. LoNigro overheard. He came over and asked if you were the Sam Beckett from Elk Ridge. When I confirmed it he said to say hello to you."

"Thanks for passing on the message, Donna. I hope he can make it down from Boston. I'd love to talk with him again."

"Well, Sam. I'd better go. I have to get back to Lawrence tomorrow. You take it easy, ok?"

"I'll do my best, Donna. I'll talk with you later. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Sam."

They both hung up the phone. Sam realized how beat he was and settled in as best he could. The cast made getting comfortable next to impossible. Sam was grateful for the painkillers. At least they let him sleep.


	14. April 8, 1973

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 14

April 8, 1973

Sam was perturbed. Walking to Tom's gravesite on crutches was not easy. But he had been commemorating this day since Tom died. He was damned if he was going to miss talking with Tom because of some stupid crutches. It was too important to let it slide past. It was late afternoon and the sun was beginning to lose its intensity.

He'd planned to come earlier in the day but he'd received a call from Donna. She was going to be able to go with him to New York City when he played at Carnegie Hall in June. He'd decided to contact the travel agent to coordinate the rooms and the activities. His family would be going as well. It had taken him awhile to address all of the plans. He'd finally gotten away around three that afternoon.

Sam parked the car as close to the gravesite as possible and worked his way up the lightly sloping hill. It probably hadn't been a good idea to drive with a broken leg but he didn't want to have anyone with him. Not on this day. It was much too special to him. Driving the automatic had been difficult but since he could hold his right leg out of the way and use his left foot for the brakes and gas, he'd managed. He reached the gravesite and as always was greeted by the cold, gleaming gray granite slab. He noted that the gravesite was being kept up. He knew his mother still visited regularly and Katie would come every now and then. He wasn't sure about his father.

"Hi, Tom. A lot's happened since last year. I've got some big news. I'm serious about a woman. Her name is Donna Elesee. You'd like her, Tom." Sam grinned, recalling how often his brother would rib him about being so shy and his unwillingness to talk with the girls. "Donna's going with me to New York City in June. I'm going to play at Carnegie Hall. Can you believe that? I guess all that practice paid off!"

Sam remembered how often that he'd wanted to forgo practice so he could hang out with Tom. Even being 6 years younger, Sam wanted to be wherever his brother was rather than cooped up in a house practicing his scales. Piano lessons came between that desire and his mother's, teacher's, and brother's appeals that he practice. He remembered Tom asking him one day if he ever wanted to play at Carnegie Hall. Sam hadn't known what that meant. His brother had told him that was where all the really great pianists played and then asked him "You know how to get to Carnegie Hall don't you?" Sam had shaken his head. Tom had smiled and said "Practice, practice, practice, Sam." Now he was going and he had Tom at least in part to thank for it.

"Basketball was going pretty well until I broke my leg. Just a ridiculous accident but it ended the season for me. It feels bad that I can't help the team other than be there to support them at the games!"

Sam looked up and noticed that the weather was beginning to change, that darker clouds were beginning to gather in the skies overhead. The temperature had started to drop as well. Sam struggled to put on the jacket that he'd tied around his waist earlier. It wasn't easy when you had to lean on crutches. He knew he should probably head back but he still had some things to say to Tom.

"I guess Mom has told you about Dad. He almost joined you. As it is, he can't work the farm as well as he used to. We now have a hired hand to help him out. But I only have two years to go before I can get back to working the farm. I think Dad wants me here now, and I tried to suggest that but Mom insists I have to finish college. You know how much emphasis she puts on education. The farm is turning a small profit again with the organic farming techniques, even with having to pay for help.

"Katie is getting really antsy about home life with both of us gone. With Dad not able to take on as much of the work, he relies a lot on Katie. She's not too keen on working the farm. It's hard on her, Tom. I think Katie just wants to have a little more free time. But then again, she's really turning into a beauty. Too much free time might not be a good thing!

"Tom, I really miss you. I wish I could really talk to you, play a game of basketball, go pheasant hunting, or just about anything else we used do. I mostly miss you when I'm alone and there's no one else around. I get the greatest urge to just call you up on the phone. But then I realize I can't and that's when the pain hits again. It doesn't happen as often anymore but it still does. I think it always will. I just hope you're happy."

A light drizzle started falling and the day turned decidedly chilly. "Well, I guess it's time to go." He turned around and started working his way away from the gravesite. The car was in sight as he started down the hill. He was suddenly thrown to the ground when one of the crutches slipped on the newly wet grass. He tried to get up but he couldn't get the leverage as the rain continued to decrease friction with the ground. What the heck was he going to do now…?

The rain started falling harder; the clouds now were bubbling black. A bolt of lightning lit up the sky. Sam normally wasn't afraid of the weather, but now, with his leg in a cast, he felt helpless. He noticed that the crack of thunder sounded less than five seconds from the flash. Rule of thumb would indicate the storm was very close. Metal crutches weren't the most comforting items to be holding at the moment.

Not being able to get on his feet, Sam considered rolling himself down the hill. Realizing that with the crutches, that would be difficult at best; he pulled himself along the ground, watching nervously as lighting bolts continued to light up the dark sky. He'd had to cut the pant leg of his jeans to pull it over the cast so it didn't provide much protection from the rain. He knew that as wet as he was, if a lightning bolt hit close, he could be electrocuted. By the time he reached the car, his heart was pounding and he was soaked through. He was concerned that the plaster in the outer layers of the cast had softened.

He had a difficult time getting into the car as well. The side of the door was wet and slippery and it was hard getting a hold he could pull himself up with. When he finally seated himself in the driver's seat, he took stock of his situation. He was cold and shaking a bit. Probably the residual fear he'd had that he might have been killed along with a mild case of hypothermia. He wasn't surprised. He felt like he had jumped into a swimming pool. He started the car and drove home.

When he pulled into the driveway, his mother came out onto the porch, a worried look on her face. She had been concerned when Sam hadn't reached home when the storm started. She ran out to him as he exited the car, trying to get the crutches in position. She helped him hobble towards the house. It was still pouring buckets but Sam managed to get to the porch with his mother's help.

Thelma looked Sam over critically, taking in his wet clothing and the copious amount of mud he had on him. "Sam, thank God you're all right! What happened?"

Sam looked at the crutches in disgust. "These damned crutches, Mom. They slipped out from under me. I couldn't walk to the car. I had to drag myself."

Thelma shook her head. "With those metal crutches, you could've been killed, Sam." He noticed her shaking. He knew she was right but didn't want her worried.

Sam reached out and gave his mother a hug. He pulled back, took her shoulder and looked her in the eyes. "I'm okay, Mom. Nothing happened. Well, the cast is a loss. I guess I need to have it checked"

Thelma insisted that they go to the emergency room immediately to see if the wet cast needed to be replaced. Again, Sam had X-rays taken. The ER doctor indicated that the bone still required a couple of weeks to heal. The wet cast was removed and a new one applied.

By the time Sam got home it was 9 p.m. and he was beat. He hobbled up to his room exhausted. He couldn't wait until the damned cast was off for good.


	15. June 23, 1973

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 15

June 23, 1973

New York City. It was truly one of the great metropolises on the planet. On the flight from Indiana, Katie had sat next to the window, her nose pressed closely to the inner Plexiglas of the plane's window, attempting to see everything she could as the plane cruised over farmland. She grinned broadly at her view of the city as they landed. Sam had sat in the aisle seat, utilizing the calming techniques he'd developed on the team plane. His mother took the center seat and spent a good part of the flight looking over at her son, knowing Sam hated to fly. She was happy when they finally landed at LaGuardia Airport and Sam had been able to get back on the ground. They had arrived about mid-morning as Sam needed to check in at Carnegie Hall by three p.m. and he had some things to take care of. Donna would be arriving in the early evening and Sam was planning to take a taxi back to the airport to meet her. From what the travel agent had told him, it really wouldn't help to rent a car. There was virtually no place to park outside of hotel parking and the cost of that was outrageous. Besides, it was only a quarter mile from the hotel to the Hall, definitely walking distance for Sam.

They were staying at an older hotel, The Taft in midtown Manhattan. It had been built in 1937 and at one time had been a pretty swanky spot. It was still a nice hotel, but at this point, its best feature was its affordability. Sam had acquired a large suite for the ladies and had taken a separate but adjoining room for himself. The building had a hollow center with windows looking out to this center space. It allowed more light to enter the rooms.

The Bellboy had brought their luggage up. Sam indicated what luggage should go into the suite and which into the adjoining room. Katie entered the suite first. "All this space is for us? Gee, it even has a living room!"

Sam smiled, following his mother into the room. "I wouldn't exactly call it that, Katie. More of a sitting area but I figured this would give us all more of a home type feeling."

The Bellboy was efficient and Sam turned to tip him. Sam was amused at his sister's wide eyed wonder at the hotel suite. However, he also understood this was the first time she'd really been away from the farming community where she'd been born. Sam remembered the flooding that had taken place that day and how worried his father had been about getting to the hospital in Terre Haute. Both Tom and he had been born at the farmhouse, but by 1957, a midwife was not the usual birthing choice. He had only been four years old at the time and Tom was ten. They'd been left with the Smithson's while his father had taken his mother to the hospital. Tom had kept Sam busy helping him with his math homework, although looking back he was probably just working at keeping Sam calm since it was the first time he'd really been away from either one of his parents. They had both been happy to get the phone call later than evening that they had a baby sister.

During her tour of the room, Katie had noted the three other doors. Quickly checking them out, she found two bedrooms and a bath. "Hey Sam, there's only two bedrooms here. Where's Donna gonna sleep?"

Thelma Beckett looked at her daughter. "Katie, you and I will be sharing a room. Donna will have the other one."

Katie's face fell. "I thought I'd get my own room."

Thelma gave Katie a stern look. "You should be happy that Sam wanted you to be here and got us this room, young lady."

Katie looked sheepish. "I know, Mom. Sorry, Sam."

"That's okay, Sis. I really wanted all of you to be here. I just wish Dad could have come too." He turned to leave the room. "I'll be right back. I'm going to get my things put away. Let me know when you guys are ready and we can go eat lunch."

His Mother and Katie nodded, indicating they would be similarly unpacking. They would be in New York for four days and three nights. The concert would take place on the third evening, giving Sam an opportunity to practice and even a little time to play tourist in the Big Apple.

Katie went over to the pass through door that led to Sam's room. She unlocked her side of it but found another locked door without a handle. She knocked. "Hey, Sam. Open up." The door opened.

"Yeah?"

"You might as well leave that open. That way you can get to the sitting area too."

"Well, I'll leave it unlocked but I'd like to keep the door closed, Katie. I do need my privacy."

"Okay." She walked into his room. "It's a little small, isn't it?"

"I don't need much space. It will be fine." He continued putting his clothes away in the drawers of the dresser and hanging up other clothes in the closet. "Have you got everything put away?"

"Uh, Mom's doing it."

Sam looked at his sister with a frown. "Katie, you should help her."

"Okay, okay." She turned around and walked back through the pass through doors. Sam walked over and closed the one on his side but left it unlocked.

Five minutes later, he walked into the suite and sat down on the sofa, waiting for his mother and Katie to finish. They completed their unpacking quickly and they decided to go find some lunch. Leaving the elevator, Sam went to the concierge's desk to inquire about a good place to eat and the closest place to rent a tuxedo. Obtaining the pertinent information, he guided his mother and sister to the restaurant.

The Chinese restaurant that had been suggested turned out to be a really nice but affordable restaurant. Well, affordable by New York standards. They all agreed the food was fantastic through so they felt the price was fair. After their lunch, they tracked down the tuxedo shop. Sam explained what he needed and quickly was fitted for a white tie tuxedo with a simple black jacket which would be appropriate for a concert pianist to wear. The shop asked him to come back in the day of the concert for a final fitting to which he readily agreed.

They headed off down the street towards Carnegie Hall. Having lived on the farm, walking was not a problem. They figured this would be a good way to get a feel for the city as well.

As they crossed the street, Katie looked into the eyes of one of the men crossing from the other side of the street. Following her Indiana manners, she smiled and said hello. The man looked at her as if she was crazy and cussed a blue streak at her. Sam, being slightly in front turned to say something to the man but he was already heading off down the street in the fast paced walk that city dwellers used.

He looked over at his mother, a shocked expression on her face. "Uh, Katie? Maybe you shouldn't say anything to anyone." He'd been to Chicago and knew that making eye contact was not exactly considered to be city friendly.

Katie nodded. "Okay, Sam. But that guy didn't have to be so rude."

"I know, but that's they way some city folk are."

They continued walking and soon reached their destination. From the outside, Carnegie Hall wasn't really that impressive architecturally. Indeed, it was rather ugly. However, it was still a thrill to see it if only for its history. Walking into the interior, they found there were several halls to use for the various artistic activities that took place there. All of the halls were relatively large but still would allow one to experience the intimacy of a performance.

After all of the specifics and practice schedules had been worked out, Sam checked his watch. Donna's flight would be arriving in a little over an hour. He'd been told to allow plenty of time to get back to the airport since traffic could often come to a standstill. He called a taxi and had them drop his mother and Katie at the hotel. He then asked the driver to take him back to the airport. They arrived with only ten minutes to spare.

Sam walked to the gate and waited as the plane pulled up. He watched as the passengers got off, eventually seeing Donna. He smiled and walked up to her. "Hi, sweetheart. I've missed you."

She put her arms around him and they kissed. "I've missed you too. I'm glad we'll be here together."

He picked up her overnight case. "I take it you have more luggage?"

She smiled at him. "Yeah…well, it's hard to get 4 days worth of clothes into an overnight bag, silly."

He gave her his infamous lop-sided grin. "Yeah, I know. Let's go get it and then head out to the hotel."

They headed down to the luggage carousel, watching until Donna suitcases arrived on the belt. Sam picked those up and Donna took the overnight bag back. They went out and hailed a taxi, arriving back to the hotel about six in the evening.

Sam's mother and sister greeted Donna warmly. They gave her some time to get cleaned up after her journey and then headed out for dinner. Sam had decided to take the group to The Tavern on the Green for dinner. He'd made reservations over two months previously. It had recently been purchased and was undergoing some changes but it was still a very nice meal.

They arrived back in the room by eleven. Sam assured that all the ladies were safe back in the suite and then went to his own room. They were all tired from their travels and we glad to be able to get to sleep knowing that the next morning would mean another busy day.


	16. June 24, 1973

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 16

June 24, 1973

The next morning, Sam went over to Carnegie Hall to practice for a few hours. He'd checked with the Hall managers and found that he could come in at 8:30 a.m. He'd had an early breakfast and walked over, marveling at the city, absolutely awake and active. However, he also noted that as much as it was an exciting place to visit, it was definitely not on his list of places he would like to live. Way too much noise and too little nature outside of Central Park.

While Sam practiced, Donna went over to Columbia to visit the physics department. Columbia was one of the universities she'd been considering to continue her doctorate after she graduated with her bachelor's the following spring. With only a year to complete, she was starting to look into where she would go.

Meanwhile, his mother and Katie decided to go to the Statue of Liberty for a tour. They both enjoyed the ferry ride which took them to the small island where the monument stood. Katie was a little concerned by the small size of the steps as they climbed to the top. Both she and Mrs. Beckett were excited to see the city from the crown of the statue but were sad that due to the deterioration of the statue, they could not climb into the torch. Both noted that it was a good thing that Sam was not with them this venue would not be the best location considering his fear of heights.

The group had decided to meet back at the hotel at noon for lunch and further sightseeing in the afternoon. When Sam arrived back to the hotel about eleven thirty, the desk clerk called him over. A message had been left for him. He opened the letter and found it was from Dr. LoNigro. He was asking to take the group out to dinner that night and had asked for Sam to call him. Sam wondered how Dr. LoNigro would have known which hotel and went up to the room to call him.

Sam dialed the local number and was surprised when the phone was answered directly instead of from a hotel. "May I speak with Dr. LoNigro, please?"

"This is he."

"Um. This is Sam Beckett returning your call, sir."

Dr. LoNigro's voice took on a excited edge. "Sam! It's been awhile. Donna Elesee had told me you'd be in New York City to play at Carnegie Hall when I met her this past spring. I called your home and your father told me where you and your family were staying."

Sam smiled as he mentioned, "Donna is with us as well."

"That's great! I really do want to have a chance to see you before the concert tomorrow night."

"Do you have tickets?"

"Absolutely. So, can you join me tonight? I know a nice Italian place I frequent when I come to New York City. Some of the best food around."

"That would be nice. I'd be remiss though if I didn't ask what the ladies should wear. Being with three I know they'll all want to know."

Dr. LoNigro laughed. "Yes. I can understand. Either a dress or nice pants suit would be fine for them. If its okay, I'll pick everyone up tonight at seven."

"That would be fine, sir. Looking forward to seeing you then."

"Same here, Sam. Until later." The connection clicked off.

By the time they had hung up, Sam heard a knock on the pass through door. He opened it ,finding Katie on the other side. He figured Donna would be back soon as well.

"Hi, Katie. Where's Mom? How was the Statue of Liberty?"

Katie gushed. "She went into our room to call Dad. Oh Sam, it was so great! We got to ride a ferry and then walk up to the top of the statue. We got to look out through her crown. It was really cool!" She stopped for a minute and look over at him, her face becoming serious. "But you wouldn't have liked it. It was pretty high up."

Sam smiled. Ever since he was nine years old, when he and Tom had been playing Tarzan in the barn, he'd been afraid of heights. He knew Katie was probably right about how much he would have enjoyed that particular sight. "Did you get to go into the torch?"

Katie's face fell. "No. I guess the statue is not in the best of shape. They don't allow anyone in the torch now."

"That's too bad. They ought to fix the statue. It's pretty important historically."

"Yeah."

His mother came out of the bedroom. "Hi Sam."

"Hi, Mom. How's Dad?"

"He's doing fine. He says one of the cows is sick. The vet should be out later today."

Sam looked thoughtful. "It's good he can get him today." They all turned to the door as the sound of the unlocking mechanism being accessed. Donna stepped in a second later.

Sam smiled. "Donna. You look happy."

"Hi Sam, Mrs. Beckett, Katie. Columbia was great. They have a great physics department."

Sam suddenly perked up even more. "Oh. Speaking of physics, Dr. LoNigro called. He's taking us all out to dinner tonight."

Thelma Beckett spoke up, "That's very nice of him."

Sam nodded. "I thought so, too. It will be wonderful to see him again."

They all took a few more minutes to freshen up before heading out for lunch. His mother had voiced an interest in seeing the NBC studios and Radio City Music Hall. Donna had said she like to see Rockefeller Center and the Empire State Building. Katie wanted to see where Greenwich Village was since so many of the bands she liked had started there. They opted for sandwiches at a local deli suggested by the concierge and went off on their discovery tour of the city.

The day went well, with everyone getting to see what they wanted in the city. Katie really liked seeing the little stop animation characters from Rudolf the Red Nose Reindeer special that aired every Christmas. The other sites were enjoyed as well.

They had held off the Empire State Building for last. Sam was going to remain at the bottom but Donna convinced him that if he stayed close to the elevators, he wouldn't even know he was that high up. They had to take two elevators; the first only got them half way up. As it was, it took quite some time to get to the top. When they reached the top, Sam didn't at first feel so bad. Donna was right that from the elevators, he didn't experience the numbing fear that gripped him when he was significantly above the ground. She asked if he could step to the beginning of the observation deck, not actually stepping to the edge but enough to have view of the city in the picture. Sam figured a couple of seconds wouldn't hurt too badly. He was wrong. The fear gripped him almost immediately and he was hard pressed to plant a smile on his face as the picture was taken. He quickly went back to the elevators and promised to meet the ladies down stairs.

They got back to the hotel about 5:30 p.m. and all spent some time getting ready for the evening. By seven'o'clock, Thelma had dressed in a nice green shirtwaist dress, Donna was in a red miniskirt and lightweight, black summer sweater, and Katie had changed into a tailored, blue and white checked hot pants outfit with large bell cuffs and a scooped neck. Sam noticed that the shorts weren't too short though, knowing his mother would never approve of Katie wearing anything too revealing. Sam himself was wearing a pair of beige slacks with white button down shirt and navy blue sports jacket. They headed down to the lobby.

Coming out of the elevator, Sam spotted Dr. LoNigro in the lobby. He steered the ladies towards him. Putting out his hand, Sam said, "Hello, Dr. LoNigro. Nice to see you again."

Dr. LoNigro took Sam's hand and shook it. "And you as well." He turned to Sam's Mother and sister. "Mrs. Beckett, it's been awhile. This can't be Katie?"

Thelma smiled. "Yes. She's grown quite a bit the last few years."

"I can see. Nice to see you, Katie." He turned to Donna. "Ah, Donna Elesee. A pleasure seeing you again as well."

"And you too, sir. I was glad you were at the physics conference earlier this year. I enjoyed speaking with you about your work at MIT."

"That was fun. I hope we can revisit that again tonight, but for now, we need to get to Luigi's. I have a taxi waiting."

They all headed outside. Katie sat up front with Sam, and Dr. LoNigro settled into the back with Donna and Mrs. Beckett. When they reached the restaurant, though, a shocking sight met their eyes.

Several police cruisers were outside the restaurant and there was police tape around the sidewalk. An ambulance was also in view. A young lady of about 30 years old was being lead in handcuffs out to one of the cruisers. Dr. LoNigro noticed the proprietor of the restaurant standing just outside the police tape and stepped out of the Taxi to see what was going on. He came back to the car a few minutes later, a bit shaken.

"What's happened?"

"Well, it seems that a local gangster was shot. Vincent Loggia. The woman being put into the police car was apparently the person who killed him." He turned to the cabdriver. "My friend suggested that since we're so close and it's getting a bit late to look around for a restaurant that the Italian place at Blake's Plaza is good and shouldn't need reservations. You know where that is?"

The cabby nodded. "Everyone knows about Blake's Plaza. It was built back in 1962. Pretty nice place but not like one of these neighborhood places."

"Well since Luigi's is out of the question now that will have to do."

They drove to the new location and stepped out. As suggested, getting a table was not too difficult. They'd been seated and Katie excused herself to go to the ladies room. It took her a few minutes to come out. When she did a tall blonde woman also left the restroom. Sam noticed that Katie kept looking over toward the woman as she walked back to her table.

"Who was that, Katie?"

"Oh, it was a modeling agent. She said I should call her, that I had a great 'look'"

Donna spoke up. "Those agents aren't to be trusted, Katie. There was one that came by Lawrence and had the same pitch. I hear it didn't work out too well for some of the girls who decided to leave school and model."

Katie wasn't so sure. "Well, it wouldn't hurt to call."

Thelma shook her head. "You'll do no such thing, young lady. You haven't even finished high school." She said it such that there would be no room for argument. Katie looked frustrated but knew that when her mother said something in that tone of voice, there was no arguing. The evening progressed on. The conversation covered the upcoming concert, the sightseeing, and overall general topics. They were finishing the main part of their meal when Donna brought up her Columbia visit.

"You liked the physics department there? While it's quite a good department, you should really come out to MIT and visit us as well."

Donna grinned. "I'd love to. Are you asking?"

"Yes. I was very impressed by you work at the conference. You have a great head for physics. Not quite as good as Sam's, but then I doubt anyone on this earth today has his potential."

Donna was shocked. She knew that Sam had a natural affinity for the subject, but to hear such a leading scientist state this about Sam was incredible. "He has that much potential?"

"Yes. The type of mind he has comes around once in a lifetime. Maybe once in several lifetimes. I'd figure his potential in the subject is right up there with Newton or Einstein."

Sam blushed. "I don't think it's that high, Dr. LoNigro."

Dr. LoNigro looked directly at the only male Beckett at the table, an intensity in his eyes. "Sam, I've known a lot of great physicists, taught a lot of great students. My graduate students are some of the brightest anywhere. You do have that potential. You know you could still pursue it. I've talked with some of your professors at Purdue. They concur."

Sam's eyebrows went up in surprise and wonder. "My agriculture profs? What would they know about physics?"

"No. I know you're taking some physics classes as well."

"I had a little extra time. And as electives, they were interesting."

"Sam. This is your calling. I still remember that time concept you spoke about back when your brother was alive. He wanted you to go to MIT."

Sam bristled. "Tom's gone. I have other things to take care of now. "

The ladies at the table had been watching this verbal banter going on. Finally Thelma spoke up. "Sam, your father and I have always said you should do what makes you happy."

Sam looked towards his mother. "Farming does make me happy, Mom. I love the farm, the cornfields, hunting pheasant in the fall. I love the smell of the newly turned ground, I even love the mooing of the cows. That is what makes me happy. Being home with my family."

Katie had been more interested in the dessert menu than the conversation at hand. "Hey, I've always heard about New York Cheesecake. Now we can get some and find out if it's as good as they say."

Sam latched onto Katie's change in direction. "Yeah, that does sound good. What do you think, Donna?"

Donna was looking at Sam with a strange look on her face. "Uh, yeah. That sounds nice." She turned back to Dr. LoNigro. "So Sam's throwing away a gift in physics?"

Dr. LoNigro answered her honestly. "I believe so, yes. But ultimately it is Sam's decision. Although I was hoping I might be able to get him to see it differently after taking the courses he has. I guess it's not going to happen."

"No sir, it won't. I will be going back to work on the family farm after graduation."

Dr. LoNigro nodded. "Well, you can't blame me for trying one last time, Sam. You really do have a gift." He turned to Donna. "I would really like for you to come up to MIT, Donna. As I say, I was very impressed by your work as well."

Donna smiled. "I would like that. We can discuss it later though."

For the rest of the meal the conversation turned back to mundane things. They got back to the hotel at eleven. Dr. LoNigro indicated to Donna that he was staying with a colleague from Columbia and he would give her a call the next morning.


	17. June 25, 1973

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 17

June 25, 1973

The next morning Sam was up again early. He headed down to the restaurant for breakfast and on a whim, purchased a New York Times. The front page story was regarding the murder whose aftermath they had witnessed the night before.

Sam read through the article. Apparently there had been some history between the alleged killer, Miss Jennifer Elizabeth Farrington, a writer, and the victim, Vincent Loggia, better known as Vinny the Viper. According the sources used by the Times, Mr. Loggia had been married to the killer's sister about 20 years before. The alleged killer claimed that her sister had been murdered by Mr. Loggia two years after they married and that furthermore, the gangster had murdered her sister's ex-husband, Phillip Dumont, the day that Mr. Loggia had married her sister, Catherine. The Times indicated that the cause of Mr. Dumont's death had been ruled a suicide. Mr. Dumont had apparently jumped off the deck of the Queen Mary to his death during a transatlantic cruise from New York City to London, devastated that his ex-wife was remarrying. The story went on to say how Mr. Loggia had purchased his wife's family company, Farrington Nautical after the wedding. Finally, the Times reported that while the gangster had never been convicted of murder, he had been convicted of a number of felonies, at least three of which preceded his marriage to Catherine Farrington. Apparently, the murder of Vincent Loggia was precipitated by the marriage of the victim's daughter, who was the niece of Miss Farrington to another underworld kingpin.

As Sam finished the article, he shook his head, wondering if there could have been anyway to prevent such a tragedy in the first place. So many lives ruined. He finished his meal and headed out to practice.

When he arrived, he found another pianist practicing the piano. This man would be playing a few days after Sam's concert. He noted that the aria was close to being finished and decided to sit and listen to this man play. He noted there was a German Shepard on the stage with the pianist and that the man wore dark glasses and had no music in front of him. He apparently played totally by ear. When the aria was completed, flawlessly from what Sam could hear, he clapped loudly. The man on stage took the dog's harness in hand and headed toward the sound of Sam's clapping.

"Thank you. I didn't realize I had an audience."

"I'm just here to practice myself. I'm playing tonight, a guest pianist."

"Ah. You must be Samuel Beckett then."

"Yes. I'm surprised you've heard of me. You have me at a disadvantage."

"I'm Andrew Ross. I'm one of the artists who started the Michelle Steven's Guest Player's program," stated the man of medium height with silver beginning to pepper his dark brown hair.

"Then perhaps you can tell me a little about Michelle Stevens."

The man's countenance turned thoughtful as his memory went back. "Yes. She was a beautiful woman and my assistant for a time about eight years ago. She was a nursing student who loved the musical arts. She was strangled in Central Park. Her mother blamed me for her death saying if she hadn't been my assistant, she never would have died. I convinced the Carnegie Foundation to start the guest program in her honor. It certainly wasn't enough, but at least she is remembered."

Sam's voice indicated his sadness at hearing of her brutal death. "I'm honored to have been chosen to play."

"I heard the tape your professor provided. Would you mind if I listened to your practice? I will be here again tonight as well."

Sam smiled. "Not at all. In fact I'd be greatly appreciative if you'd let me know if there's anything I need to change."

Andrew nodded. He sat a few rows back as Sam took the stage. He pulled out his music, a few selections from Beethoven, including Fur Elise and played. When he was finished, he heard the applause from Andrew Ross and a few barks from his dog. He went to speak once more with the maestro.

"Wonderful, Sam. You could definitely become a concert pianist for a living. Your technique is flawless."

"I had some great teachers."

Taking on a more critical look, the maestro continued. "It shows. But your underlying talent is evident as well. There are some things you can never learn from others. You have to have it in yourself. I hear it in your music."

"Thank you."

"Well, I do need to be getting going. I'll see you again tonight." He took the harness to the dog again. "Come, Mozart."

"Have a great day, Mr. Ross."

Sam headed out of Carnegie Hall, a bit of a spring in his step. It wasn't everyday that his music was critiqued by such a fantastic artist. He headed down to the formal wear store for the final fitting of his tuxedo. They indicated they would deliver the suit to Carnegie Hall two hours before the performance time. Sam agreed that would be acceptable.

When he arrived back to the hotel, the three ladies had gone out so he decided to take a nap before the performance that night. It was about four o'clock when he heard a knock on the pass through door. His mother and Donna had arrived back at the room. Katie had indicated that she wanted to visit the gift shop to find some postcards. About ten minutes after Donna and his Mother had arrived back; the sound of Katie entering the room was evident. When she walked in her face was deathly white.

"What's the matter, Katie?" Concern was evident in both the body language and voice of Thelma Beckett.

Katie was just about in tears. "Oh, Mom. I'm sorry. I was calling that lady, Helen La Baron. The modeling agent? The one you told me not to call?"

Thelma was still confused. "What happened, Katie? A phone call couldn't have scared you like this."

Katie sat down on the couch, her head bent, her voice rather subdued, "Well, I was in one of the phone booths down in the lobby area. You know that long line? I was talking on one of the phones when this guy in the booth next to me smiled at me. I smiled back at him and I broke eye contact and my head went down. Mom…he was, um, he was…" Katie was fidgeting.

Thelma took her daughter's hand. "What, Katie? You can tell us."

Katie looked up at her brother, and he saw she was blushing. "Um…Sam, can you leave please? I don't want to say this in front of you."

Sam shook his head. "I'm not leaving, Katie. Whatever it is, I'm here for you. Just tell us what happened?"

Katie started wringing her hands in earnest. "Well, he was…" Finally she just blurted it out as if saying it quickly would take away some of the sting. "He was playing with himself. It was awful! I just hung up the phone and walked fast to the elevators. I got on one and pushed all the buttons. Do you think he'd follow me?" Katie was crying. He mother reached over and hugged her daughter.

"Oh, honey. I'm sorry you had to see something like that. You did the right thing with the elevators. I doubt if he could know where you went." Thelma pulled away and she held both of Katie's shoulders in her hands and looked her right in the eyes. "But we are not going to leave you alone anymore on this trip. You have my solemn word on that."

Sam had started pacing. "That's unacceptable! My little sister shouldn't have had to experience that! What kind of place is this? I thought it was a nice hotel!"

Donna, having lived all of her life in San Francisco took a slightly different take on what happens in big cities. "Sam, I'm sure it is a nice place. Perverts like that can be found anywhere. They might even choose to come into nicer places just so they can victimize people that otherwise they couldn't get to. It happens."

Sam's face held a hardness, his lips pursed and eyes blazing. "It shouldn't"

Donna agreed. "No, it shouldn't. But it does."

Sam was still angry but understood what Donna was saying. "I'm going to report it though."

Donna nodded and watched as Sam walked out to let the proprietors know of the situation. When he returned, Katie was calmer and had gone into her room to rest.

Sam left earlier than the ladies to get changed at Carnegie Hall. It had been an interesting day with both ups and downs. Now he was preparing to live out a dream that many artists had of playing Carnegie Hall. He mentally prepared himself for his performance. When the time came, he entered the stage and sat at the Steinway Grand Piano center stage. He noted that with the lights he really couldn't see well into the crowd but could tell the place was packed. He realized he knew at least five of the people in the audience. He decided to fight stage fright at playing before a full house that he'd pretend to be playing for only those five. It worked well. When he hit his last notes, the audience erupted into waves of applause. He stood and bowed, walking off stage, hearing the request for an encore. He walked back onto the stage and played one more piece by Mozart before giving his final bow and heading back stage.

In the aftermath of the experience, Sam realized he was totally drained. On the one side, he felt absolute exhilaration. On the other side, he felt like he'd just run a marathon. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he opened his eyes again it was to see Donna and his family walking over to him.

Sam's mother was beaming. "Sam, that was incredible! I'm so proud of you!"

"Thanks. It feels good." Suddenly as if it had just hit him, he reached over and gave his loved ones a hug. "I just played Carnegie Hall just like Tom said I would!" He looked up and said softly, "Thanks Tom. I hope you got to see as well."


	18. June 26, 1973

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 18

June 26, 1973

The morning after the concert, Sam was still feeling rather surreal. He felt good that everything had gone well. During the short reception after the show, he'd received several compliments for his work. Although Sam was not really the type to seek out such recognition, it did feel good to receive it.

He had again spoken with Andrew Ross. It was such an honor to have him in the audience. To hear such a respected musician praise his work was a high compliment indeed. Mr. Ross had suggested the concert to quite a number of artists and other patrons of the musical arts and they had provided their words of joy at hearing such a great performance. Dr. LoNigro had sought him out to give him his congratulations. "You're a greatly talented man, Sam Beckett. I wish you well."

They'd gone to the Russian Tea Room after the concert. While it was a late dinner, it was a continuation of the Carnegie experience. Sam was sure that for as long as he lived, this memory would stay with him.

Sam turned his mind back to the packing he needed to do. He'd be going home today and Donna would be heading back to San Francisco. Each time they were together, Sam felt it harder to separate from her. He knew she had her life and he his, but all he wanted was to spend the time together. Again, he promised himself that someday that would come true.

Check out time was noon. Both his family's and Donna's flights had been scheduled for around 3:00 p.m. Packing up didn't take long it so they found they had a few hours to kill. Sam asked Donna if she'd like a carriage ride in Central Park. Thelma and Katie decided to do a little shopping at Macy's. Both groups headed out in different directions and agreed to meet back at the hotel at 11:30 a.m.

As the carriage ride went through the park, Donna leaned back against Sam. As he put his arms around her, he sighed. If he could make this moment last forever, it would be the answer to a prayer. He voice full, he whispered, "Donna, I love you."

She looked up to him, her eyes soft. "I love you too, Sam."

The rest of the ride was spent in each other's arms, a romantic end to the four days they'd been there. A few hours later, they would be in their own separate worlds but for now they were together and they were happy.

XoXoXoXoXoXo

On the flight back to Indianapolis, the family had been split up due to booking issues. Katie wanted to spend some time with Sam and so Thelma had taken the single seat four rows in from of them. As soon as the plane took off, and Sam was not holding the arm rests in a death grip, Katie started telling him about Macys. "Sam, you wouldn't believe it! The whole place was huge! I think all the stores in Terre Haute could fit into it."

He looked at his sister's wide eyed look, skepticism plastered upon his face. "I doubt that, Katie."

She conceded. "Okay, probably not. But, they had an entire floor for only makeup and perfume. An entire _floor_, Sam!"

He shook his head, confused at why this would be so important. "Why would anyone need that much makeup or perfume?"

Katie rolled her eyes. "That's not the point. It's just the idea. I doubt if they have a store even in Indianapolis like that." She stopped for a moment and then another thought came to her. "And when we went into the teen clothing section? They had tons of my size! Usually I can find one or two pairs of jeans that fit right in Terre Haute. Here they had like 15 styles and at least 30 pairs in every size!"

Sam looked at this sister straight in the eyes. "I think you're taking this a bit too serious. I mean, you only get a few pairs of jeans in any one year anyways and that's only because you're trying to be fashionable. New York is a big city. I guess they can afford that type of excess."

Katie closed her eyes, envisioning herself living there. "Well, I want to live in New York City, Sam."

"Why? It's _too_ big. And there aren't many trees, except in the parks. And it's just too expensive to boot."

Katie's face lit up. "But, Sam! It's so exciting!"

Sam laughed. "You're just a country girl taken with the big city. Trust me, you wouldn't like it."

Feeling he was trying to burst her bubble, her look was annoyed. "No. You wouldn't like it. I would."

Finally, Sam just stated the truth plainly. "Well, you better come back down from your cloud, Katie. You won't be able to live in New York City until after you finish school. You have another couple of years to go yet."

Her forehead creased as if she was trying to work out a problem. "I could always drop out and get a G.E.D., Sam."

His eyes were wide and incredulous. "You know Mom and Dad wouldn't allow that, Katie. You're smart. You get your education."

Katie looked down and shook her head. "You're smart and Tom was smart, Sam. I'm at best just average."

Sam, feeling that perhaps his skepticism had brought her down came up with a plan of his own. "I'll tell you what, Katie. You just keep working hard at school and I promise you, I'll give you a trip to New York City for your graduation present from me. In two years, it might not look like such a great place to live."

She looked up at him grinning. "You're on."

Katie pulled out a few of the fashion magazines that she'd picked up at the airport and started to look at them. Sam leaned his seat back and closed his eyes. He was still a bit drained from the previous few days. It wouldn't hurt to take a little nap.

Thirty minutes into the flight, he felt a light tap on his shoulder. The flight attendant was serving lunch and she wanted to know if he wanted his meal. While airline food wasn't his favorite, he knew they would have a long drive back to Elk Ridge from Indianapolis. He awoke and set the tray table in front of him.

Katie, on the other hand was excited about her second meal ever during a flight, the first being four days before. She thought the smaller silverware and dishes were cool and she didn't even complain about the dry, tasteless meat loaf with a tomato crust, carrot cubes, and mashed potatoes the consistency of pudding. She was having a great time.

A few hours later, the flight landed. Thelma went down to the carousel to pick up their luggage while Sam headed out to the long term parking to retrieve the car. He drove to the loading zone and saw his mother, glad that she'd spent the money to get a cart. He got out and loaded the bags into the trunk and they headed back home, Sam and his Mom eager to get back to their real lives and Katie dreaming of a future where she'd live life as far away from the farm and cows as possible.


	19. October 20, 1973

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 19

October 20, 1973

The fall semester was in full swing. Sam had started all of his classes and basketball practice was back in his life. He'd been glad that working the farm over the summer had helped to get his leg back into shape. He and Katie had played basketball every day but he was glad to have a little more competition now. The team's medical staff had been concerned that he'd need more physical therapy to get back in the game fully, but was glad when he was able to slide right back in.

Sam smiled as he recalled his summer. Carnegie Hall had been a treat. Katie had been awestruck by the big city lights and sounds and coming back to the farm was a let down for her. While Katie had never been as content as the boys were with the farm, after seeing the sights of New York, the cows definitely weren't her favorite companions. She was getting antsy about being the sole Beckett child at home when Sam was at school. Although she'd decided that going after a modeling career was a pretty silly idea, she still wanted to be somewhere, anywhere else than rural Indiana. Sam felt certain she'd snap out of it soon though. After all, the farm was home. Then again, he figured that it was a good idea that he'd promised her that trip to New York when she graduated high school. It would give her something to set her sights on.

Continuing to think back to the New York trip, he took the framed photo of Donna and himself at the top of the Empire State Building off his desk. Sam couldn't believe she'd actually talked him into going to the top. The things you'd do for someone you love and he certainly felt that way about Donna. When they'd gotten off the elevator, a trip that had taken two stages, Sam had felt okay. He'd still felt like he was inside the building and really couldn't see much outside. When he'd stepped out with Donna onto the observation platform, however, he'd frozen. His mind all but shut down as the irrational fear of heights took its toll. All around him he could only see the tops of buildings. He found he couldn't look around anywhere without feeling dizzy and nauseated. Donna had asked his mother to take a quick photo of the two of them and then had suggested that Sam go back down to the ground floor and wait for them. She hadn't had to suggest it twice and he'd agreed readily. It rather embarrassed him that she'd needed to lead him to the elevator. Reaching the ground floor of the building had given him a great feeling of relief. Now, looking into the photo, he could see Donna's radiantly smiling face next to the forced smile and terrified eyes of his own visage. He didn't have any intention of taking another picture to remedy that. At least Donna looked great!

Sam had continued to take a variety of classes in addition to his required coursework. Most of the nuts and bolts of the Agricultural coursework were pretty straightforward to him. He was fascinated, though, by the myriad biology classes he had to take finding the world of flora and fauna incredibly diverse. He'd learned about the life cycle of various insect pests which was important to know in farming since one needed to know when to apply pesticides to end specific infestations. He figured that since he planned to continue following organic methods that would mean he wouldn't be applying that knowledge directly unless there was a natural material that could be used. Still learning how most farmers handled the work might provide some insight as to potential organic useful tools.

Sam was glad that this would be the second year to room with Ryan. During the previous year Sam had found another soul that loved to discuss new ideas and concepts. Ryan had been intrigued when Sam had brought up some interesting ideas, which would entail merging biological brain and nerve cells within a computer chip matrix. Ryan stated that with Sam's imagination he should write science fiction. Sam laughed and said he'd leave that to the real masters like Heinlein, Asimov, Clarke, and Ellison. It had been fun to read through Ryan's textbooks and see what computer science had to offer. Some of the on the edge innovators in the field were even talking about networks of individual computers rather than the mainframes that were the staple of the computing work. It was a fascinating field.

Sam checked his watch, finding that it was about time to meet Ryan. They were attending a lecture on a computer programming language that had been developed in recent years called C. This newer program language had many attributes that make it attractive for writing system software. Ryan had convinced Sam to join him for the lecture tonight. He headed over to the lecture hall to hear the visiting speaker. Ryan had saved him a seat and they listened, engrossed in the presentation. Afterwards, Ryan discussed some ideas he had for using the new language to program for use in systems utilizing parallel/associative processing. Sam was intrigued by Ryan's concepts.

They headed out to a coffee shop not far from campus. Walking in, they found a booth and both ordered cheeseburgers and cokes. While they were waiting for their food, Ryan took some of the napkins and was drawing his concept. Sam pointed out some innovations that he thought might be helpful.

Ryan stopped and looked over at Sam, amazed. "How do you do that?"

Sam was surprised. "Do what?"

"You read a few of my textbooks, go to some lectures, and suddenly, you show an understanding of this field that most of the students in the department don't get."

With a slightly sarcastic smile, Sam answered, "I doubt that."

Ryan shook his head. His voice held absolute sincerity as he continued, "No, Sam. You really do. I could see you going into this field. You have a natural affinity for it. Why are you going into agriculture again?"

"I'm the only one in the family that will be able to keep the family farm going. My brother is dead and my sister's not real keen on the concept of farming. The farm is my Dad's life. I need to be there to help him. Besides, the farm has been in the family since my great-grandparents settled in Elk Ridge. I'll be the fourth generation to farm the same land and hopefully pass it down to my children someday."

"Yeah. I guess that makes sense. Family seems to be pretty important to you."

"It is."

"It just seems like there are so many things that you're good at besides farming. Since we became roommates, I've seen you take advanced physics and mathematics, play piano at the level of a concert pianist, and you're one of the best players on our basketball team. You know more about astronomy and archeology than anyone else I know and you have a pretty extensive grasp of medical concepts. And now I can see you could set computer science on its ear as well. And those are just a few of the things you do well. It just seems that farming wouldn't be your first choice of career. I mean, is there anything you can't do?"

Sam rolled his eyes. "Oh come on, Ryan, I'm not that good. Yeah, I have a lot of interests and I try to learn as much about things that interest me as I can. So does everyone else."

"I don't think so. Okay, so people have hobbies and interests and they do them because they like to. You're at a level with most of the things that interest you that you could easily become an expert in those fields. Hell, you should be teaching some of the professors around here."

"You're exaggerating, Ryan."

"I'm just afraid, Beckett, that one day you're going to wake up and wonder where the time has gone and what you could have done. I know that your family is important but it's your life."

"You're right. It's my life and I've decided what I want to do with it. For over 100 years, the Becketts have been in Elk Ridge. That seems like a pretty good legacy to continue."

Putting his hands up, Ryan acquiesced. "Okay, I'll leave you be. If there's one thing I've learned, once you've made up your mind about something it's nearly impossible to steer you in another direction. I guess it's that tenacity that makes you so go at so many things."

With a lop sided grin, Sam responded, "I suppose it's a Beckett trait. My mother has always said that my father could out stubborn a mule. I guess in that, I take after my Dad."

Ryan agreed. Their food had arrived and they both were hungry. It didn't take long to finish their meal.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXo

Sam and Ryan returned to their room. They had both gotten into their studies when the phone rang. Sam picked it up.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Sam."

"Hi, Donna."

"I wanted to find out what you're planning for Thanksgiving."

"Just planning on going home. You want to join me again this year? I know the family would love to have you again."

"Actually, Sam, I was wondering if you'd like to come out to San Francisco. I'd like you to meet Mom."

"Sure, Donna. That sounds great.

"Okay. We can get into the specifics later. I just wanted to find out if you could come. I've got to go."

"No problem." He stopped for a moment and his voice got quieter. "I love you and I miss you."

"I love you, too. Thanksgiving's only about a month away. That's not too long to wait to see you again."

"That's true. Doesn't mean I don't want to be with you now."

"I know. I feel that way to. Anyways, I'd better go. Mom will kill me if I rack up too many long distance calls this month."

Sam laughed and said goodbye. As he hung up the phone, he realized he made up his mind and Thanksgiving would be the perfect time to do something about it.


	20. November 22 to 25, 1973

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 20

November 22, 1973

Patricia Elesee, Donna's mother, lived in a cozy little Cape Cod house in San Rafael, about ten miles north of San Francisco. Filled with antiques, the house exuded an air of elegance and sophistication. Patricia worked as an auditor for a Worker's Compensation and General Liability insurance company. She traveled quite a bit but she commanded a salary that most women in the workforce, the numbers of which were growing, only wished they could obtain. It had allowed Donna to go to Lawrence College, a private Catholic school to study physics. It would allow her to continue her education at MIT.

Donna was quite happy that she'd met Dr. Sebastian LoNigro again earlier in the summer when Sam had played at Carnegie Hall. She knew that Sam had an incredible and seemingly natural grasp of physics, including that strange and weird area of quantum mechanics. But she was floored to hear Dr. LoNigro claim that Sam's mind was potentially on par with Newton's or Einstein's. She knew that Sam had been offered a scholarship at MIT that he had refused to accept. She couldn't understand why Sam wouldn't take the offer, with this potential.

Sam, though, was hell-bent on finishing his agricultural degree and heading back to the farm in Elk Ridge to pursue a farmer's life. Not that she denigrated farmers. How would people eat if someone weren't raising the crops and livestock? But, to have the ability to understand some of the fundamental properties of the universe, how could farming compare to that? But Sam could out-stubborn a mule. His mother had said that was a common Beckett trait, one she had learned to live with having been married to Sam's father for 27 years. In any case, the meeting had led to Dr. LoNigro's recommendation that Donna, herself, be offered a scholarship. She'd originally set her sites on Cal Tech or Columbia, but MIT would be a better place for her graduate studies. She certainly felt that having Dr. LoNigro as her faculty advisor would be fruitful.

She had invited Sam to her mother's for Thanksgiving, since the previous year she had visited the Beckett farm. She was sure it would be a new experience for him. While the Becketts tended to go all out--shined silver, crystal wine glasses, good china for a special meal--the Elesees' were more low-key. Her mother would set a nice table, of course, but dressing for dinner was casual and her mother didn't see the need to fuss with the "fancy trappings." Patricia had her fill of those "stuffy dinners" when she was married to Donna's father, a then up and coming Lieutenant in the Army. After he left things had changed.

Being an only child in a single-parent family, this simplification seemed reasonable. Indeed, most of the time, they would be invited to other homes for Thanksgiving. Donna could only remember three other Thanksgiving's after her father had left that her mother and she had hosted a Thanksgiving dinner at their home. Today it would be just Sam, her mother, and herself.

She heard the doorbell ring and went to answer it. It was Sam. He was wearing a jacket and slacks even though she'd told him dress was casual. He had flowers in his hand and was holding a box tied with string in the other. Donna looked at it curiously.

Sam caught the question in her eyes and stated, "Mom said that since you liked the pumpkin pie last year, she'd send one with me for dessert."

Donna thought back to the previous Thanksgiving, the one she attended at Sam's home in Elk Ridge. Sam's family was a delight. Donna really liked his parents. They were so down to earth, and although she appreciated them, she questioned whether she could live that kind of life. She loved Sam, though, and she knew he planned to live on the farm.

Donna also liked his sister, Katie. She was a sweet girl and she certainly looked up to her big brother. Donna knew that there had been an even older brother in the family. Sam had told her about Tom, who had died in 1970 in Vietnam. For Sam, that had been traumatic. Donna's father had also been in Vietnam and had been killed. But since she hadn't even seen him since she was 10, she didn't feel the impact of the loss immediately. All that she felt was the fact that he had abandoned her as a child and his death was simply the final stage of that abandonment.

"I'll be sure to send a thank-you to her. She really makes a wonderful pie."

Sam grinned. "You know, she's won a blue ribbon for her pumpkin pie each year since 1958."

Donna was impressed. "Wow, a 15 year streak! That is some record."

Donna's mother walked into the room. She was wearing a warm fuzzy sweater and blue jeans. "You must be Sam," she said offering her hand.

"Yes Ma'am. Glad to meet you." He handed the pie box to Donna and took her mother's hand to shake it. He then offered the flowers. "These are for you, Ms. Elesee." He wasn't absolutely sure how to address her but the new prefix "Ms" was coming into vogue and she was a professional woman so he figured that would work.

Taking the flowers, she said "Thank you. These will look lovely in a vase. And call me Patricia, Sam. We're not very formal around here." She looked at him, noticing his dress. She turned to Donna. "Didn't you tell him to dress casual?"

"I did, Mom. From Sam's point of view, this is casual for Thanksgiving."

He mother laughed. "Okay. Different strokes."

"Sam's mother sent one of her pumpkin pies for dessert, Mom." Donna indicated the box in her hand.

"Okay, so no Mrs. Smith's tonight then."

Sam quickly backtracked, "If someone else has baked a pie, don't feel you have to serve my mother's."

Patricia's mouth dropped. "You don't know Mrs. Smith's?"

"Mom, I don't think Sam's ever had a store-bought frozen pie."

Sam realized his mistake and laughed. "Oh, no. Mom's pies and cobblers sort of spoiled me for that."

"Well, I'm sure this will be much better. And the Cool Whip will go on it just fine."

Sam sighed. He felt it would be rude to say anything about the Cool Whip even though, having been raised on real whipped cream, he couldn't stomach the stuff. He'd just leave it off of his piece of pie.

Patricia went to the kitchen to put the flowers in water. She came out a few minutes later and placed the flowers on the credenza next to the table, which was already set for dinner. Sam noticed that instead of fine china, the place settings and wine glasses were hand thrown pottery with a beautiful speckled design. The table setting was simple but beautiful.

Sam saw that the ­­­­­­Redskins/Lions football game was on. Sam certainly followed basketball a bit closer, but he also liked football, although he really didn't care about either of these teams. Patricia had been born in Michigan, though, and she had been a Lions fan all her life. They all sat down to watch the game. About 15 minutes after the final score had been announced, the Redskins trouncing the Lions 20 - 0, the buzzer on the oven went off. Patricia went into the kitchen. Sam followed her and asked if he could help out. She was taking a large turkey breast out of the oven.

"Well, if you'd like to mash those potatoes over there that would be a help."

"Okay. Where's the butter?"

"Oh. We don't use butter. The margarine is in the fridge."

_Margarine?!_ Well, as Patricia said earlier, different strokes. He took the Blue Bonnet stick out of the wrapper and plopped it into the potatoes, watching it melt. It really didn't melt the same way butter did. He quickly mashed the potatoes, adding the skim milk that he also found in the fridge thinking, _"Not exactly how Mom would make it."_

"Donna, there's a nice Chardonnay in the fridge. Would you please open it?"

"Okay, Mom." Donna went over to the cherry cabinet and pulled out a wine opener. She quickly opened the bottle and put it into a wine cooler on the table.

A few minutes later, the meal was ready. In addition to the turkey breast and mashed potatoes, there were green beans, Stove-Top stuffing, and jellied cranberry sauce. Sam reminded himself that the type of food really didn't matter. It was the idea of being thankful that counted.

As if hearing his thoughts, Patricia asked, "Sam, would you say the blessing please?"

"Uh….Okay." He cleared his throat. "Lord, we thank you for this meal shared with love. We ask that you put this food to our use, and us to thy service. Amen."

"Amen," said Donna and her mother simultaneously.

They ate the dinner, talking about the plans that Donna had for going to MIT. Sam felt a slight tug of jealousy but also was happy for her. "Have you and Dr. LoNigro talked about graduate projects?"

"I think we're going to work on addressing the disconnect between quantum mechanics and general relativity. Dr. LoNigro has some ideas on how they might be reconciled."

Patricia looked at Donna. "I don't know what that means, Donna, but it does sound like a fascinating area of study."

Sam turned to Patricia and said, "I think Donna will be able to make great contributions to that study. She has an incredible grasp of theoretical physics."

Donna blushed. "Sam definitely has talent there as well." She looked over at him, eyes wistful, "I wish that you'd reconsider changing your major and going to MIT with me."

Sam looked down at his plate. "Donna, I don't wish to discuss that right now, if you don't mind."

Donna wanted to say more but figure that she could wait until after dinner. "All right, Sam." Turning to her mother, Donna asked, "So Mom, how have the pottery classes been?" Her mother's hobby was pottery and she was very good at it.

"Wonderful, Donna. We're working in some new slips and glazes." They continued to talk about the various types of pottery projects and the innovations being made in the arena.

The rest of the dinner conversation touched on a variety of subjects including Sam's upcoming basketball season, Patricia and Donna's plans to go to Spain over the Christmas break, and Sam's plans to again spend the Christmas holidays at the farm.

When the pie was finally served, Patricia raved at how much better than the Mrs. Smith this pie was. Sam smiled. There was a reason his mother's pie continued to win at the state fair year after year.

"What brand of pie crusts does your mother use, Sam?" Patricia asked taking another bite of the pie.

"She makes it herself. That's what gives it the flaky crust."

"Well, the pie is absolutely wonderful."

After dinner, Sam again asked if he could help out. Patricia assured him that the dishes could be put into the dishwasher and there was little to do. She suggested that Sam and Donna retire to the living room while she finished up.

They sat by the fireplace in the living room. Donna decided she really needed to have Sam consider MIT again by reminding him of his dream. "Sam, you know how you told me about that idea you had about how a person's birth and death are like the ends of a string? How if you tie them together, you could connect them?"

"Yeah…" Sam's voice held a slight hesitancy in it.

"Well…would you mind if I pursued that line of thought? I told Dr. LoNigro about what you had said and he's really interested in the concept."

"That would be fine, Donna. It's not like I'll be able to pursue it working on the farm."

"Well, I've wanted to discuss that with you. Sam, Dr. LoNigro said that you have one of the finest minds for quantum mechanics he's ever known. He said he'd really like to have you reconsider your decisions."

Sam sighed deeply. When he looked up, there was a bit of annoyance playing about his eyes. "Donna, we've been over this before. I _have_ to help my father with the farm. Even with Ezra helping him out, there's too much for Dad to do."

"I _know_ that your family is important to you, Sam. It's one of the things I love about you. You're always there for them." Donna smiled at Sam but then her demeanor turned serious. "But, Sam, you have such a gift. You're wasting it on this agriculture degree. You _need _to be in a physics lab somewhere."

"Donna. I am not wasting anything. I'm going to help Dad with the farm. That's good enough for me." He stopped for a moment and considered his next words, finally speaking. "I'll be honest. I'd like to follow physics and other things too. But I need to do this."

"You're just too stubborn for words, Sam Beckett!" Donna's eyes were blazing.

"Well, once I've decided on something, I'll stick with it and I've decided to forego the graduate work. I need to get back to Dad."

Donna was about to say something else when her mother walked into the room. Noticing the tension, she asked if there was anything wrong.

"Nothing, Patricia."

"Everything, Mom."

Patricia sighed. "Sounds like you're not having a meeting of the minds."

Sam looked down. "Donna doesn't approve of my future plans."

"Because they won't make you happy, Sam."

"How do you know?"

"I've been to Elk Ridge with you. With your mind, Sam, you won't find the mental stimulation you need in that little town. Farming was fine for your father, but you need more."

"My father isn't a stupid man."

"I never said he was. But, Sam, even you have to recognize you're not like your father. You're not like most of the people in that town or in the world at large. Your abilities and knowledge beg to be challenged and you can only do that someplace like MIT."

"I can read. There is a library in Elk Ridge."

"That's not enough and you know it, Sam!"

Sam was getting a bit angered over the conversation. He needed to stop this now. "Donna, I'm feeling a bit tired. Patricia, it was a lovely night but I fear I'm not going to be very good company for the rest of it. Would the two of you mind if I turned in?"

Patricia was mortified. She saw her daughter fuming. She'd never believed Donna would put Sam in such a difficult position. Patricia's face took on a worried expression but she answered. "Oh, of course not Sam. I hope you sleep well."

Sam nodded. He looked over to Donna, arms hugging her upper body, lips pursed. He knew she was mad, but _Damn it…this is my life! _He simply said softly, "Goodnight, Donna."

Without looking up at him she answered with a coolness in her voice, "Goodnight, Sam. See you tomorrow."

Sam turned and walked up the stairs to the room that Donna had showed him earlier when he had arrived. He'd heard Donna and her mother start a heated discussion as soon as they thought he'd be out of effective earshot. He shook his head as he stepped into the room. Walking over to the carry-on he'd kept close to him on the plane, he unzipped a small compartment and took out the small velvet box he'd brought with him. Maybe this weekend wouldn't be the right time to ask.

XoXoXoXoXoXoX

November 23, 1973,

Sam awoke early. He was used to getting up at six in the morning at Purdue. Now that he was on Pacific time, he found it was still dark outside. He put on his robe and padded down the stairs, not wanting to awaken the other inhabitants in the house. He made his way to the kitchen and found a note by the coffee maker from Patricia. He picked it up and read it.

'_Sam…if you're up before Donna and me, feel free to make the coffee. You only need to hit the start button.'_

Sam smiled and followed the instructions. As the coffee brewed, he thought how nice it was that Patricia had taken the time to prepare this. She was an absolute gem. The thought of a gem turned his mind back to the plans he'd made prior to coming to visit.

'_Oh, Donna. I love you so much. Why can't you see I need help my family? That it's what I have to do. That MIT was never really in my future, not after Tom died.' _His heart was saddened that she'd been so upset the night before.

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! The sound of the coffee maker finishing its brew cycle bleated at him pulling him from his thoughts. He could smell the rich, dark roast coffee and poured himself a cup. He went out on the deck, which looked out over San Pablo Bay. He sat in one of the redwood chairs on the desk, sipping his coffee and continuing to think about what he could do.

He'd asked Donna if she had any plans for them over the weekend. She'd mentioned wanting head up to Calistoga in the Napa Valley and stay Friday night at the Golden Haven Hot Springs, returning home Saturday evening. Sunday, she'd planned a hike in Muir Woods. She told him the Redwood trees were absolutely awesome and the ridge trail was one of her favorites.

Sam headed back to the kitchen, refilling his mug and returning to his solitary sentinel. As he continued to look out to the east, he began to notice hints of light. The sun would be up soon. He loved to watch the sky as it turned from a dark black to a deep purple and eventually started taking on deep rose shading as the earth slowly rotated towards the sun. Just as the hints of brilliant pinks and sherbet orange began to streak the sky, he heard the sound of the sliding glass door opening behind him. He looked behind him and saw Donna walking over to him.

Sam put his mug down on the table. "Good Morning."

"Good morning. Okay if I join you?"

"Of course. Come over here." He held his arms open to her, indicating that he wanted her to sit in his lap. She walked over and placed herself in his arms. She laid her head on his chest, hearing the steady beat of his heart, content as his arms wrapped around her. She looked up and saw him watching as the sky took on more color…bits of light now shining off of the bay. His face took on a noble look as he took in the awesomeness of the sunrise. He looked down at Donna, his eyes searching hers.

Donna looked into those green eyes. "Sam, I'm sorry for last night. This is your life. You have to lead it, even if I feel that you're making a mistake, it's yours to make."

He was moved by her apology. "I love you." His hand reached up and he softly ran his thumb along her jaw line.

"I love you too, Sam." She didn't want to fight. Didn't want to lose this moment. She felt loved and safe in his arms. She pulled in closer to him as his lips sought hers. As the sun rose in the east, they continued to kiss in an ever deepening passion.

Sam broke away. His voice was thick and his eyes held the flames of his desire but there was concern present as he asked, "Uh, Donna? Your Mom will probably be up soon. Maybe we shouldn't be out here doing this when she finds us."

Donna nodded, pulling herself away. "I know." She extracted herself from his arms. "Let me start breakfast."

He looked over to her as she started to walk away. "Do you still want to head up to that Hot Springs resort?"

She stopped and turned, smiling. "Yes, Sam. I do." She continued back into the house.

_It still might work after all. This weekend is still young._

XoXoXoXoXo

They had arrived at their lodging for the night. Donna had asked Sam to stay outside while she checked in. She said she had a surprise.

When she came back out, she indicated where to park the car and asked Sam to bring their overnight bags. He followed her to a room and she opened it with a key. He walked in and found a room with a queen bed. He put her bag on the luggage rack.

"Nice room. Is mine next door?"

"Sam, this is our room. I want to share it with you."

"Ummm…Donna…."

"I know, you don't think this is right but Sam, I don't care. I want to be with you. I want this night."

Sam was torn. He wanted the same thing but it wasn't something that he felt they should do. If there wasn't at least a commitment to a life to be shared together. Sam knew he loved Donna and was willing to wait until they were at least engaged before going further.

He made a decision and put his bag down as well. He walked over to her and took her hand. Leading her over to the little sitting area, he had her sit down beside him on the sofa. He reached into his pocket, pulling out the box he had held the night before. What a difference 15 hours made.

Sam cleared his throat. He was nervous as he turned to her. "Donna, this isn't exactly how I wanted to do this but somehow doing this now seems right."

Donna looked at him, a curious look on her face. "What?"

"Donna, will you marry me?" He opened the box, which held an old fashioned diamond ring.

She took a sharp breath in, gazing at the beautiful ring. "I didn't expect this. I don't know what to say."

"I love you, Donna. I want to be with you forever. Please say yes."

She looked into his eyes, finding an undying love there. She wanted that more than anything. She wanted that now. "Yes."

Sam took the ring out of the box and placed it on the ring finger of her left hand. He pulled her close to him, kissing her deeply and fully. She returned his passion, pulling him down to her. He kissed her lips, and then traced kisses down her neck. He pulled up, looking deep into the eyes of the woman he loved more than anything.

His voice was soft but urgent. "Donna, I want you." He question was a statement but there was questioning in it as well. He needed to know if he could continue.

She answered him, kissing the palm of his hand. "I want you too."

He unbuttoned her shirt, kissing her on her bare skin as the unfastening of each button revealed more of her She was wearing a front hook bra and he opened it allowing his fingers to play upon her breasts as he sought her lips again. She moaned into his throat as she undid the buttons of his shirt as well, stripping off his shirt and running her hands along his chest. He helped her out of her shirt and bra, leaving them both bare above the waist. Sam traced back down to her breasts again, kissing each one and lightly teasing each nipple with his tongue. Her back arched as she begged him with her body to continue pleasuring her, moaning his name.

As he kissed her, his hand sought the fastening of her skirt, unzipping it and pulling it down and removing it from her body. She was wearing white lace bikini panties and he ran his fingers along her flat, taut belly. She shivered. "I love you. I want you so much."

He picked her up and carried her to the bed, kissing her as they went. He laid her down softly, kissing her all over. He removed his trousers, revealing the passion he was feeling for her. Her hand reached down and touched him softly and he moaned.

"I love you, Donna. I think I have since the day I first saw you."

"Ummm," she moaned. She pulled at the elastic at his waistband, removing the fabric that separated them. He too removed the bit of lace that was the sole piece of clothing on her body.

"You're so beautiful." He flipped them, pulling Donna on top of him, feeling her body touching his. He ran his hands along her back, feeling her lean into him. His hands reached the swell of her bottom and he pulled her into him. He pulled himself to a sitting position and she wrapped her legs about him. Her hand reached down touching him as he pulled her closer to him, kissing her passionately. He flipped her again, so that now she was underneath him.

He positioned himself above her and then slowly as he kissed her allowing his tongue to intertwine with hers, he shared the joy of their union. They both moaned together. Softly, and slowly their hips moved together in that lover's dance that has existed since man and woman learned to love. Their hands traveled upon each other's bodies, as they continued to move together, luxuriating in the feeling that washed over them both.

As the rhythm of the dance increased its tempo and intensity, Sam looked into Donna's eyes. "Dulcinea. You are my Dulcinea and my love."

A deep moan issued from Donna as her body began to shiver uncontrollably. Sam answered her in kind, their souls wrapped up in the exquisite feeling that they were complete. "I love you, Duclcinea. I love you."

"I love you, Sam."

They lay back, still entwined. They stayed that way for quite sometime, basking in the afterglow of their love.

XoXoXoXoXoXo

November 23-24, 1973

The rest of their stay in the wine country area was similarly romantic. They had a lovely candlelit meal at one of the local restaurants. Sam was attentive and Donna realized that she was happy being with him. Arriving back to their room after dinner had lead to a repeat of their earlier activities that day and Donna had fallen asleep in the arms of the man she knew she loved.

The next morning, they had visited and relaxed in the hot springs and Donna had even convinced Sam to try the mud bath, although he said it reminded him too much of seeing the hogs wallowing. Donna realized that even if you could take the boy off the farm, you couldn't that the farm out of the boy.

The next afternoon, they headed back to the house, arriving home in the early evening. Patricia was happy to learn that Donna had accepted Sam's proposal. She liked this man. He was down to Earth and she knew that Donna needed someone like that. Patricia recalled that through her teen years, Donna would date a boy and then find something she couldn't reconcile with her own feelings. They would date for a time and then break up. At seventeen months, this was the longest time Donna had ever dated the same person. Patricia believed that Sam was exactly the right man for her daughter. She insisted on taking them out to dinner.

They decided that since Sam had not been to Fisherman's Wharf, they would head out for a nice dinner at Alioto's. The restaurant had been at the Wharf since 1925. The décor was elegant. Sam ordered a Dungeness Crab, having heard Donna speak of them in the past and indicated how wonderful it was. His two feminine companions had decided on other meals. While they enjoyed the famous crabs as well, having access to them locally, they went with meals that they otherwise wouldn't not have had.

After dinner, they walked along the Wharf, checking out the local activities. Sam enjoyed playing tourist, walking hand in hand with Donna. Patricia took a picture of them, the bay to the background. Their smiles indicated their great happiness in the moment.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXo

November 25, 1973

The next morning, Sam and Donna were up early for the hike in Muir woods. Sam's flight out wouldn't be until the late afternoon, so they had several hours to kill among the redwood trees. They pulled into the parking lot and got out, pulling their backpacks out of the backseat. They walked past the visitor area, with a cross cut of one of the trees. The Rangers had put arrows pointing to various rings which included a number of historical events. It was humbling to know that these trees lived in life spans that made a human lifespan seem insignificant in comparison.

They took the ridge trail. There was quite a bit of up and down on the trail but it was mostly pretty level. The trees above them were magnificent and the variety of plant life close to the ground was diverse. They eventually reached a point where they could see the water and they sat down and ate the lunch they had brought with them, laying out a blanket to protect them from the ground. After eating, they laid back, looking up at the canopy above them, Donna's head on Sam's shoulder.

Sam suddenly spoke, "What type of wedding do you want, Donna?"

Still simply enjoying the feeling of lying beside Sam as he softly touched her hand, she answered, "Hmmm?"

He clarified, "I mean, do you want a big church wedding or a smaller affair?"

"I guess I've always wanted to have a simple mass. Would you be willing to wear a morning suit?"

His forehead crinkled. "You mean with tails and an ascot? I suppose if that's what you want, I'd be okay with that."

"Well, when I've thought of marriage before, that's what I've always wanted."

"Then that is what you'll have. There's nothing I wouldn't do for you, Donna." The emotion in his voice was strong and loving.

She pulled herself up and looked down at the man whom she'd agreed to spend the rest of her life with. Looking into his soft green eyes, she saw the soul of a man committed to her. She had no doubt that she would be the only woman in his life. She brought her lips to his and kissed him. He responded by pulling her closer to him, the kiss deepening. As she kissed down his neck, she tasted the salt that had deposited there during their hike, she didn't mind.

They had noted that there weren't many cars parked in the visitors parking when they came in and they had certainly not seen anyone else hiking, so they knew they were likely to be alone for awhile. Still, they were on a public trail and under the thick canopy it was cool. It wouldn't be seemly to have someone come upon them in any major state of undress, so they simply necked, enjoying the feelings that washed over them as they kissed. As it turned out, it was a good choice, as they heard sounds of other people approaching. Catching their breath, they packed up their possessions and decided to head back and find another place that was would provide more privacy.

Arriving back at the parking lot, they found there were still few cars but that the ones that had been there earlier were no longer there. Except for one couple there didn't seem to be anyone else around, so they figured most of the people belonging to the cars were out hiking. The woman, petite with dark hair was standing next to a car with the hood up, a man bent under it, obviously looking at the engine.

Sam walked over and spoke up, "Anything I can help you with?"

The man came out from under the hood. "The engine isn't turning over. This is a rental and I don't know much about the model."

Sam handled his backpack to Donna to stow in the car. "Let me look at it. I'm pretty good with cars."

As the two men continued to figure out what was wrong with the vehicle, the woman walked over with Donna to her car. "Thank you for stopping to help us." She put her hand out while declaring, "I'm Beth Simon. My husband there is Dirk. We here in San Francisco for a boat race later today but figured we had some time to take in some sights first."

Donna smiled, taking the woman's hand. 'I'm Donna Elesee. I'm with my fiancé, Sam Beckett."

"Ah, young love. When are you getting married?"

"I'm not sure yet. We haven't really talked about it yet. We just got engaged a couple of days ago. Probably after I finish my doctorate work."

"Do you go to the same schools?"

"Oh, I'll be continuing at MIT in Massachusetts. Sam is going to go back to his family farm in Indiana next year after he graduates."

"My first husband went to MIT"

"Your first husband?"

"Yes. I was married to a pilot in the Navy. He was shot down in Vietnam back in 1967.

My father died in Vietnam as well. Sam lost a brother there. There are way to many people who have died in that war.

Al didn't die. I've just learned he's been repatriated." As she said this, pain was evident in her eyes. "I thought he was dead. I thought the term M.I.A. had come to mean that. I mean, if someone is a P.O.W. at least you have something to hang onto. If I'd only known he was alive…" She trailed off.

"I'm sorry." They started heading back to the men.

"No. I made my decision and I have to live with it."

"I hope you don't mind me being so forward, but it sounds as if you aren't happy with that decision."

"No. Based on what I knew at the time and the situation I was facing, I know why I choose to marry Dirk. It's just that, well, Al meant everything to me. Dirk is a fine man but he's not Al. We have a comfortable life. He likes to race his sloop." She started to change the subject and went back to asking about Donna and Sam, "So you'll be separated during your engagement?"

"Well, yes. But we've had a long distance relationship during most of our dating."

"Hmmm. My first husband and I hardly had any time together. And we never had children. I think that played a role in my willingness to believe he was really gone."

Beth stopped for a moment, amazed that she'd opened up this much to a total stranger. It wasn't like her to do that, but hearing that Al was alive had been a shock to her. She was unlikely to meet this woman ever again and that probably played a role in her opening up. It felt good to get it off her chest. Dirk would never have understood.

They walked back over to the car. Sam was now the one under the hood. "I think I can adjust the carburetor and get this car working. I just need a screwdriver."

Dirk pulled a Swiss Army knife out of his pocket. "Regular or Phillips head?"

"Regular"

Dirk put the right blade in place and handed it to Sam, who made a few adjustments. "Get in and try it out."

Dirk did so. As he turned the key, the engine roared to life. "Thanks! We appreciate your assistance."

Sam put the hood down. "No problem. Happy to help."

Dirk got back out of the car. "We've got a race later today on the bay, but after that, we'd love to take you both to dinner as a thank-you."

Sam shook his head, "That would be nice, but I'm leaving this afternoon. I have to get back to college. Classes start back up tomorrow."

"Well, again, thank you. I think if you hadn't come along, we would have been sure to miss the race."

They all continued to talk for a few minutes longer, Sam and Donna wishing the couple good luck in their race, Dirk and Beth indicating they hope the newly engaged couple had a wonderful life together. They said their goodbyes and headed out of the parking lot, forging forward as their lives continued around fate's wide wheel.


	21. January 1, 1974

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I'm sorry it's taken so long for me to get the next update. RL has taken its bite out of my time and now I'm finally being able to get things done again. I hope to be able to work on this more and have updates more frequently.

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 21

January 1, 1974

It was the beginning of the year and Sam was home with his family. He had quite a bit to look forward to this coming year. Donna would be graduating this year from Lawrence and he was finishing his junior year. They had decided to wait until Sam finished his bachelor's degree to marry so they would an engagement of a little over a year and a half. The tentative wedding plans were set for June 1975 when Donna would get her wish to be a June bride, orange blossoms and all.

At present, Donna was in Spain with her mother. Sam knew that the two Elesee women took trips far a field during the holidays. He had asked Donna about it and she'd told him that after her father left them, neither of them had wanted to be 'home for the holidays.' It had become a tradition for them. Sam wondered if Donna would be willing to change that tradition once they were married. He loved Christmas and being with family.

Katie had asked to spend the night out at Sarah's again. Thelma wasn't happy about the amount of time her daughter was spending away from home but Sam said it was just being a teenager; she'd grow out of it. Thelma had relented although she had complained that Katie spent the night away from home more times then she was comfortable.

Both Thelma and John had gone to bed early. Sam had asked them if they wanted to greet the New Year but both said they were tired so basically he had the house to himself. He watched an old movie on TV, having popped some popcorn and drinking a Diet Coke. It was a Marilyn Monroe movie, "Some Like It Hot." Sam had thought it was a little strange to show during the holiday season but reasoned that perhaps the person doing the scheduling just thought the idea of something 'hot' would be a good idea. He was glad, though. It was his favorite Monroe picture.

After the movie ended, he went out to the kitchen to wash out the bowl and saw that it was 2:00 a.m. He thought for a moment that it must be 8:00 a.m. in Barcelona. He smiled and hoped that Donna and Patricia were having a good time, then he headed up to bed.

The next morning, Sam awoke to the sound of knocking on his door. "Yeah?"

"Sam, Donna's on the phone. She wants to wish you a Happy New Year."

Sam rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. "I'll be there in just a second." He got up and pulled on his blue woolen plaid robe and headed down the stairs. Reaching the phone he found his father talking.

"…Pretty much the same, Donna. Dairy farming doesn't really change a whole lot from day to day…Oh, here's Sam." He handed the phone to his son.

"Hi Donna." He curled around a bit, seeking privacy. His parents looked at each other and headed towards the kitchen, giving the engaged couple a chance to talk. As they walked off, Sam heard his mother reminiscing with his father.

"I remember getting your letters, John. Having the postmarks from Italy…it felt like that part of the world wasn't so far away when I read your words."

Sam watched as his father smiled at his mother. It gave him a warm feeling that even after almost twenty-nine years; his parents were still so obviously in love. He hoped that he and Donna would be as happy.

"Hi Sam. Happy 1974! Donna's voice came through the line a bit crackly

"Happy New Year to you too! I'm not sure we have the best connection." He paused a moment and then asked, "So, are you and your mom having fun?"

"It's wonderful here, Sam. The Gaudi architecture is like nothing I've ever seen before. He was such a master!"

"Lot's of sights to see?"

"Oh yes. And the Tapas bars. The food is fantastic." Her voice started getting a little more excited. "And you'll never believe it but I met…" Suddenly the static on the line got so bad that Sam couldn't understand what Donna said.

"What did you say?

"I said the food is fantastic."

"No, I got that. Something about who you met."

"I said I'd met someone who's also working with Dr. LoNigro. His name is…" and the line went staticy again. "…it was really cool talking physics with him and he has such a brilliant mind." Knowing it must be costing Donna a fortune to call long distance, Sam figured he'd just ask her the guy's name when she got back.

"I'm really glad you're having such a great time." A little softer he added, "I miss you, my Dulcinea."

"I miss you too Sam. Mom and I will be home in three days. I'll call you again then."

"Okay. I love you, darling"

"I love you too, Sam. Well, I best be going."

"Yeah. Bye. Remember to call me as soon as you get home!"

"Okay." The phone went dead and the dial tone came back up. Sam placed the handpiece back into its cradle. For a moment, he almost felt jealous of Donna having someone there to discuss physics, which, despite his arguments that he preferred agriculture over physics, wasn't the truth. He sometimes found himself thinking of how things worked at the fundamental level of existence and missed being able to talk with Donna about such concepts. He shook his head and decided there was really nothing to be jealous about. After all, this was just a passion that Donna had as well. The idea that she'd met someone on her trip that she would be working with when she joined Dr. LoNigro's research team had to be exciting to her.

His mother came around the corner, noting that Sam was off the phone. "How is Donna?"

"She fine, Mom. She said she and her mother will be back in three days. I'm sure I'll hear about more about the trip then."

"Well, I have some breakfast casserole in the kitchen. It's the kind you like with the crumbled sausage and cheese."

Sam smiled. "I sure miss your cooking, Mom. The cafeteria at school just doesn't cut it sometimes."

Thelma smiled. "You know I love to cook, Sam. Having my family happy is the best reward of all."

Sam nodded and followed his mother back to the kitchen. His Dad was already at the table and was reading the newspaper. "Morning Dad."

"Morning, Sam. Says here that the organic movement is really taking hold. That was a good idea you had, Son. Elk Ridge was right at the beginning of this because of you."

"I'm glad so many have been able to take advantage of it."

"Yes, but there are still too many of our friends losing their farms. I tell you, Sam, before you know it we'll be surrounded by houses instead of farmland." John shook his head sadly.

"It doesn't seem right, Dad. Some of these farms have been in people's families for generations. To lose them to the bank just doesn't seem right."

"It isn't, Sam. The bank just keeps getting so many into the cycle of buying new equipment which can't be paid for with the small margins of profit that it's almost impossible for a farm to keep in business.

Thelma put a plate of breakfast casserole in front of Sam. "This smells really good, Mom!"

Thelma smiled again. "Would you like coffee or juice, Sam?"

"Can I have some of both, please?"

"Of course." Thelma brought over a mug of coffee and then went back and poured a large glass of orange juice. "It's been nice having you home the last week, Sam."

"Well, I have another week before I have to get back to Purdue. Coach wants to start practice before school starts up again."

Thelma fixed her own plate and sat down at the table with the two men. After taking a sip of her coffee, she asked, "How is the team coming along?"

"I think we'll do fine this year, Mom. I hope you all will be able to come to a few more home games this year."

John spoke up, "Sam, you know we'll get to as many games as we can."

"I know, Dad. It's just that it means so much to me having you there."

A knock came to the back door. Thelma started up to open it but Sam said he'd get it. It was Ezra. "Good morning, Ezra," Sam greeted.

"Good morning, Sam. I think you may want to come out to the barn. One of the cows seems to have come down with what looks like hoof and mouth."

"Darn. That's not good. We'll get Dr. Tarkens on the phone and get him out here. In the mean time, we should move her to another holding pen and get her stall washed down with antiseptic."

"I've already started on that."

"Good work, Ezra." Sam turned to his parents. "I'm going out to help Ezra. Dad, can you please call Dr. Tarkens? Let him know we might have an outbreak of hoof and mouth. We might need to vaccinate the other animals."

"Sure, son. I'll get right on it." John smiled. Since Sam had insisted that he be allowed to follow an agricultural program, he seemed to be taking to it well. While Thelma sometimes voiced her concern that perhaps Sam wasn't really as happy with that choice, John pointed out it was his life and they needed to support what Sam wanted. John couldn't say it didn't make him happy that Sam was following the family business.

Sam left to take care of the animals. As he walked towards the barn, he figured that doing so would most likely be the most exciting thing he'd deal with in real life. He pursed his lips. Well, it wasn't like he didn't plan this for himself.


	22. March 29, 1974

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 22

March 29, 1974

Sam walked into the lobby of his dorm after receiving a phone call from Donna that she'd arrived. He'd packed a bag as Donna had suggested that since she had the hotel room, they might as well put it to use for their reunion. "You sure are a sight for sore eyes," were his first words as he arrived.

Donna smiled. She and Maggie had driven up to Purdue after they learned the team had won the National Invitation Tournament the previous Sunday. In the same week, George had been offered a job at a commercial construction firm as soon as he graduated that May. It was a great first job for George and would give him excellent hands on experience using his knowledge of mechanical engineering. Maggie had wanted to celebrate with him. Sam had been asking for Donna to visit again as well, and the two women figured the event warranted it.

"You're not looking so bad yourself, Sam." She went into his arms and he gave her a long passionate kiss. Donna was surprised as Sam tended to be rather circumspect with his shows of affection in public. When they broke, she looked up into his eyes. "Wow. You must be really glad to see me!"

Sam nodded his agreement. "You don't know how glad, Donna. Hell, it's been over four months."

She smiled remembering that Thanksgiving weekend when she had agreed to marry Sam during his weekend in San Francisco. Since then, they had talked on the phone more and writing had picked up as well. She'd spent Christmas break in Spain with her mother and both of them still had school responsibilities. Getting together physically had been extremely difficult. "I know, Sam. I've missed you too."

He gave her another kiss and she melted into it. When one of the other students walked by muttering, "Just get a room," Sam reluctantly ended his greeting, a bit embarrassed at the comment, and not a little concerned with how accurately that statement foretold their plans for the evening. Donna saw the look on his face and, deciding that leaving the building was a good idea, asked, "So, you want to get some dinner?"

"Yeah. That sounds good." His flushed visage returned to a more normal shade. Sam picked up his bag and started walking out of the building, Donna beside him. "How do hamburgers sound?"

"I was thinking Italian."

"Italian it is." They headed over to his pickup. Sam threw his bag in the back and opened the door for Donna. She jumped up into the passenger seat. Sam got in and started the truck. They headed out for a little restaurant that Sam had discovered a few months prior. "I think you'll like this place. The lasagna is terrific."

When they arrived, Sam helped Donna down and they walked into the little restaurant. The tables were covered with the stereotypical red and white checkered tablecloths. In the center of each table was a candle in a basket cover bottle that the wax had been allowed to drip onto. The waitress seated them at a table near the fireplace.

"This is quaint," noted Donna, as she looked around and took in the ambiance of the restaurant.

"Yeah. They stay to a tried and true theme but their food is really good." They checked out their menus and quickly decided on their orders. Sam ordered the lasagna and Donna got the ravioli with meatballs. As they waited for their meals, they talked.

"So, tell me about the latest you've heard from MIT." Sam rested his arms on the edge of the table and leaned forward eager to hear

"Well, you remember that grad student I told you I met in Spain?"

"Yeah, Paul Roth."

"Well, I saw him again at the Physics conference that was in Columbus last month. He's got some great ideas looking at the quantum effects in crystal formation. He said that I'd be a great addition to their research team."

Sam smiled. "You'd be an asset wherever you go, Donna."

"Thanks, Sam. I just wish…"

Sam looked at her sharply. "If you're going to say anything about my plans for the future, stop. I really don't want to get into that." He suddenly softened, his eyes begging her to just let the former drop. "I just want to spend a nice evening with you, Donna. It's been so long since we've been together."

"Okay, Sam. I want to spend time with you too. I have missed you so much."

He took her hand and looked deeply into her eyes. "And I've missed you. I was really hoping you'd come home with me at Christmas instead of going to Spain." He raised her hand to his lips and kissed it. "I love you, Donna."

She smiled, answering with a teasing sound, "I'm glad. Makes being engaged sort of special."

"Yeah. It tends to help, doesn't it?" He'd missed seeing her eyes when she was gently teasing him. Talking over the phone had kept them up to date with each others lives, but it wasn't the same as being in the same space together. They looked at each other for a moment more when they became aware of the waitress placing the tray on a folding holder to the side of the table. Sam released her hand and they watched as the woman skillfully manipulated the dishes with their entrees.

"Careful, the plates are hot," intoned the server, placing the meals in front of them. "Is there anything else I can get you?" the woman asked once they were served. Sam indicated he'd like some additional cheese. The woman nodded and headed off to get it.

Donna took a bite, surprised at how good the ravioli was. Sam commented that he thought the sauce was some of the best he'd ever eaten. The server returned with the cheese and Sam place a hefty amount on his lasagna. Over dinner, the engaged couple continued to talk about their plans.

"Sam, do you think we could have a small ceremony? I just don't want to have a big church wedding."

"Why not?" Sam was curious. He really hadn't thought deeply about this point, but based on his knowledge of weddings, they usually seemed to be rather sizable.

She looked down, an inscrutable expression on her face. "Well, I know my parents had a big one and look where that got them."

Sam reached over and took her hand again. He knew that Donna still hurt when she thought about her father who'd left when she was nine years old. His voice was soft as he answered, "You know, Donna, not everyone who gets married separates. My parents are going on their twenty-ninth year together.

She looked up into his eyes knowing he was truly saddened at her pain. "I know, Sam. That's what you grew up with. I grew up with an absent father." She paused, another wave of sadness crossing her face. "I don't even know what's happened to him. He never called or wrote. It was like he walked out of our life and simply disappeared.

"So you've said." He squeezed her hand and nodded. "Okay, Donna, small ceremony."

A grateful smile was his answer. As they continued, the talk turned to her upcoming graduation and the plans she was making. "I'm still working on my final seminar. I'm a little nervous to be presenting in front of the faculty."

"You'll do great, Donna. I know you have the material down. You've been studying enough." That was one of the reasons Donna hadn't been able to get away to come to even one of his games this season. He'd missed having her in the crowd, but he knew doing well on the seminar was very important to her.

"I know I have it. It's just I'm not sure how good my presentation skills are." She paused and added, "Although Paul did say he'd give me a critique next month."

"Next month? What's next month?"

She explained, "They're holding a Physics conference at M.I.T. in April, and I'm going. Dr. LoNigro thought it might be nice introduction to the type of research that's is being done at the school."

"Well, I hope you enjoy it." They finished their dinner and Donna said she was too full for dessert. Sam paid the bill and they left. Donna had asked Sam to spend the weekend with her since she and Maggie were going to stay two nights and since the basketball season was over, he had agreed. They arrived back at the hotel and spent the night reclaiming the bliss they had discovered the previous November. Sam and Donna finally fell asleep in each others arms.

When Sam awoke, he looked to the clock. It was seven a.m. and he was surprised at the late hour. He normally didn't sleep that late. Then again, normally he didn't have a beautiful woman in bed with him who he'd spent the night making passionate love to. As he gazed lovingly over at his still slumbering Donna, it crossed his mind how lucky he was to have met, wooed, and won her. She was everything he'd ever wanted in a woman. He gave her a light kiss on her shoulder and then quietly slipped out of bed to take a shower.

When he emerged from the steamy room, he had one towel wrapped around his waist and was using another one to dry his hair. Donna had awoken and he found her still in bed, a pensive look on her face.

"A penny for your thoughts?" She didn't answer. "Okay, I raise my offer to a nickel but that's as high as I'm going." His attempt to lighten her mood didn't seem to have an effect. "What's wrong, Donna."

Finally, she spoke. "Sam? What do you expect of me?"

"What?" Sam dropped the towel he just used to dry his hair on the bed and sat down next to Donna, a confused look on his face. He certainly didn't expect this after the previous night.

She repeated, "What do you expect of me? I mean, I know we've gone back and forth about this, but you really, really plan on going back to the farm, don't you?"

He nodded, not sure where she was going with this. He'd been honest with her from the first. He knew she wasn't fully thrilled with the idea but she'd gone along with it. "Yes. That's been my plan and I don't see any reason to change it."

She sighed, her shoulders sagging. "That's just it. I thought I could live with that as well. Now that I'm getting ready to go to graduate school, I'm not so sure. I don't think I want to live a rural life."

"Oh, that." Sam said smiling. He patted her on her leg before getting up and pulling his clean clothes out of the bag he'd brought. "You could probably get a job teaching at Indiana State or at the Community College after you get your doctorate, Donna. The farm isn't so far away as to prevent you from continuing in your field." His voice showed that he considered this to be a reasonable idea.

As she listened to him talk, her mouth turned downwards and she shook her head, stating firmly, "I don't want to teach. At least I don't want that to be my primary job. I want to be working on cutting edge research and I know that type of research isn't in Elk Ridge or anywhere close to it."

As his head poked out of the green cotton sweater he'd pulled on, he frowned. "What are you saying, Donna?" Sam was definitely sure he didn't like the direction the conversation was going.

She steeled herself before answering sure that Sam was not going to take her next words well. "I don't want to be a farmer's wife. I don't want to live my life on a farm. I'm a city girl, Sam. I want to live in the city at an institution doing cutting edge Physics research." She stopped herself for a moment, looking at Sam, looking into his eyes that spoke his feeling of betrayal. Trying to get him to understand she continued, "I want to do that with you, Sam. I love you, but I want us to live somewhere other than your home town."

Sam sat there, not saying a word at first, processing what she was telling him. Donna was again giving him a decision to make, one he thought she'd at least somewhat accepted before. Obviously, he was wrong. "Why now, Donna? You've known since we met what I have to do. My brother's gone and my sister's not too keen on staying around Elk Ridge. I'm all my family has left to keep the farm in the family."

She tried to reason with him, "Couldn't you just lease it out? Let someone else do the farming and you still keep the land?"

He shook his head which left no doubt that he thought her idea was unacceptable. "It doesn't work that way, Donna." He was getting a bit angry about the way she was expecting him to give up what he knew was his obligation, his responsibility.

"Well, I understand your sister's attitude. I mean, I've never really been to keen on farm life myself. I thought I could do it. I thought that my love for you would allow that. I guess I just want something more, you know?" Donna plaintively asked, her arms crossed defensively in front of her

Sam got up and started pacing, the magnitude of his upset plain in the speed he paced in the sizable hotel room. Three strides up, three strides back. "No. I don't know." He turned to his fiancée, an anguished look in his eyes. "Why are you doing this now?"

"Cause I have my whole life changing soon. I realized it this morning. I'm graduating. I'm going to graduate school. And I find I want more from life. I just don't want to live on a farm." She got up and walked over to him. He'd stopped pacing and was standing, looking at her. She wrapped her arms around him, placing her head on his chest. "Sam, you've told me your plans and I thought I could live with them. I find now that I can't but you can change your mind and live with mine. You know you would love the world of theoretical physics. You know more from dabbling in it them most people do from years of study." She felt him straighten, a tensing of his back muscles.

"No, Donna." He said it plainly, softly, but she knew then, it was probably a losing battle. Still, she had to try.

She let him go and looked up into his eyes seeing the stubborn decision sitting in them. "Sam, why do we have to follow your dream? Isn't mine important enough?"

He let out a sharp breath. "Of course your dreams are important. I love you and I want you to be happy, but we both have to compromise."

"You're not." The way she voiced it spoke volumes to Sam and he realized that she truly felt he was not giving her a choice.

He tilted his head, his lips pursed. "Yes, I am. I understand your need to continue with Physics. You just need to lower your sights a little. Teaching at Indiana State would be a good profession. Think of the students you could inspire."

She couldn't believe he didn't see her need to do more. Inspiring others wasn't the reason she'd followed the science, accepted the scholarship and research assistanceship. "It's not enough, Sam. It's not enough for me." She started taking her ring off. "Here," she said, anger clouding her voice. She shoved the ring at him.

Sam was equally upset and didn't take the ring. "What are you doing, Donna?"

"I'm giving you back your ring. Until you start thinking of my needs and desires, I know I don't want to continue this." She took his hand and placed the ring it, turning and walking away immediately afterwards.

He stood there, shocked. He looked into his hand seeing his grandmother's ring, small and delicate, in his palm. He looked up at her retreating back. "You're just angry right now. You don't mean this." His voice was painted with the pain he was feeling, the distress that her decision was bringing him.

She turned suddenly, her eyes blazing. "Yes, I'm angry. And I'm hurt that you persist with this misguided plan to hide out on a farm in Indiana instead of using your special talent. I can't believe you're willing to cast _it_, and _me_, aside just so that your precious _stupid_ farm can stay in the family!" There, she'd said it. Ever since she'd learned exactly how special a gift he had, she'd felt it almost criminal that he'd ignore it to milk cows and plant corn. Sam had a destiny before him, even if he didn't see it.

He felt he'd been shot in the heart. How could she say this to him? How could she turn so cold? "That's not fair, Donna. What about you? You want me to drop everything I know I need to do to follow your plan. Don't you think you're being selfish?"

She stood her ground. "I know that you have the potential to do so much more, Sam and you're going to throw that all away to stay a farmer in a hick town."

He disagreed. His home town might not be as fancy as San Francisco, but it was full of kind hearted souls who had known him and his family for years, although quite a few had had to move away in recent years as their farms failed. "Elk Ridge may be off the beaten path, but it's not a hick town. God, Donna, I can't believe you're saying this to me." He reached out to her once more. "I love you. That should be enough."

She shook her head. "I'm sorry, Sam. I'm really sorry but it isn't enough. I love you too, but I can't stay with you if you insist that's how I have to live my life. I just can't." She turned away from him, again.

Sam sighed, staring at her back. He'd never thought he'd be in this situation. He'd given his heart to the woman he loved and after she agreed to love him for who he was, she turned on that promise. He walked up to her and put his hands on her shoulder. "Okay, Donna. I think you're making a mistake. I do love you but I have to follow what I know is right for me."

She nodded but didn't say anything more. He let go of her shoulder and finished dressing and getting his things together. Through it all neither said a word although Sam would steal glances at Donna. She looked sad but determined. Finally, zipping up the bag, he turned to her figuring he'd provide a way back. He hoped she'd take it. "Donna. I'm still ready to talk this out. Let me know when you're ready to do that."

She shook her head. "No, Sam. You're not going to change your mind, and I'm not going to change mine either. It's better if we just end it here and now." A tear started falling but she brushed it away. "Goodbye, Sam."

He walked over to her and took her in his arms once more. She started to cry in earnest. He let her cry wondering all along what was he doing. Part of him didn't want to let her go, wanted to cave in and change his plans and follow that siren song of theoretical physics but another part told him he had responsibilities to family and that thought finally won out. Whispering into her hair, he breathed, "Goodbye, Donna. I wish you happiness." He gave her a final kiss on the head then turned and walked out the room and out of her life.


	23. April 8, 1974

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 23

April 8, 1973

The day was shining this year unlike the previous one. He'd decided to walk to the cemetery and the movement had been good for him, although it was melancholy. Sam recalled how cold and wet the day had been last year and realized that his mood would have better fit it than this year. The last nine days had been Hell for him, questioning himself, becoming distracted. He'd even flunked the first test in his life last week in the Agri-business class he was taking. He just couldn't seem to focus.

He'd taken this Monday off from school as well. He'd been home all weekend and had assured his parents that he was fine, even though he hadn't felt that way. They were concerned with his lack of appetite and his general listlessness. He told them he was hurt but he would get over it eventually. Time heals all wounds.

Sam had called Donna the previous Tuesday knowing she would be heading back to school. He'd left message after message but she refused to call him back. It was sinking in. Their relationship had come to an end and Sam's heart was heavy with pain.

A part of him felt, though, that perhaps this was for the best. After all, Donna had made it clear that she didn't want the same life he did, keeping the farm in his family for another generation. He tried to tell himself that he was lucky that she'd come to this decision before they made the mistake of actually going through the ceremony only to get a divorce later. He had just felt that their love was one that wouldn't follow that path.

As he approached the grave, he noticed how thick the grass had grown on the site. He noticed a few dandelions had started to push their leaves up and he felt the passage of time keenly.

"It's been four years now, Tom." He began as he knelt down to arrange the flowers his mother had requested he bring to his brother's grave. Having something to occupy his hands was helpful as it still hurt to think he'd never again see his brother. He closed his eyes tightly and pulled his lips together as he attempted to control the feeling that welled within him. "I still miss you so much. I wish you were here to talk with now."

Pulling a pocket knife out, he went to work on the dandelions, hoping to pull them out by their roots. The expended energy allowed him to keep his emotions in check. He figured in some ways it was a losing battle, but on the other hand, it gave him something to do while he held his one sided conversation.

"You know Donna? The woman I said I was interested in? We got engaged in November, but she broke it off last week." Until he'd said it, he'd been holding up pretty good. Now the tears started to fall, tickling his face with their travel. He brushed them away before continuing with a cracked voice. "She wasn't willing to share my life, Tom. She said she didn't want to be a farmer's wife."

He paused for awhile, thinking back on the time since they'd met. Again the pain came and he wondered if he should just give up and follow her, reclaiming his dream to study Quantum Physics. Looking at the gravestone, he decided that nothing had really changed. He had to help his folks keep the farm.

"You know, Tom? I'm hurting bad now, but I think things will work out okay eventually. I mean, I'm still just 20 years old. I have my entire life ahead of me. I could meet someone else. After all, Dad was 29 when he married Mom. They have a good marriage. I just need to be patient."

Sam finished up with the minor weeding at the gravesite. He decided to close his eyes and allow the day to shine down on him for awhile. He allowed himself to imagine that it was like when Tom was alive and they would be close but not really talking. If he tried hard enough, perhaps he'd feel his brother was there beside him.

_He opened his eyes and saw Tom walking towards him. A smile lit his face and he jumped up to run towards his brother. "Tom! Oh God! Tom! How are you alive? They made a mistake and it wasn't you? Right?"_

_Tom looked at him with sad eyes. "No, Sam. It wasn't a mistake. You're dreaming."_

"_Dreaming?" His heart fell harder. "Dreaming?" he repeated as tears sprung to his eyes. "I don't want to dream you. I want you here."_

"_I know, Sam. I wish I could be."_

"_Yeah, me too."_

_They looked at each other for a moment. Tom seemed ready to say something more._

"Sam? Are you okay?"

The sudden voice pulled him from his slumber and he opened his eyes to see his sister looking down at him. He figured with as little sleep as he'd had the past nine days, it wasn't surprising that he fell asleep.

"Katie? What are you doing here?" He scrubbed at his eyes to pull further into wakefulness.

"Mom sent me to look for you. It's been three hours, Sam." she said looking somewhat bothered that her Mother had sent her to find him.

Sam nodded. "Okay. I'm sorry. I guess I was just tired." He started to get up. "I had a dream about Tom."

"He's gone, Sam."

With annoyance in his voice, he snapped, "I know that, Katie." At the downturn of her mouth, he softened and smiled. "It was just nice to have the dream. It felt in the middle of it that he was still here. I miss him, Katie."

"I do too, Sam, but he's not coming back and dreams are just that. Dreams."

"I suppose," he said shrugging his shoulders. A residual feeling that perhaps this was more continued to linger in his mind. He wished that Katie hadn't awoken him when she did. He would have liked to hear what Tom would have said to him, even if it was a dream.

"Well, let's get back home. Mom's making peach cobbler with the rest of the frozen peaches from last summer. She said since you're going back to Purdue tomorrow, she wants to send you off with good memories."

"Okay. How did you get here?"

Katie narrowed her eyes. With the tone of exasperation that was common to teenagers she answered, "I drove, Sam. You know I _can _drive."

"Yeah. You're growing up," Sam replied, smiling at the fact that his little sister wasn't so little anymore. "Before you know it, you'll be heading off to college yourself."

Katie looked away suddenly. "Uh. Yeah. I guess." She paused and then turned back to him. "Come on, I'll race you to the truck and I'll beat you too."

He looked at the gravestone and then back at her. The sides of his mouth rose slightly clashing with the sadness in his eyes. "Give me a minute more, okay?"

She started to open her mouth but instead nodded as she looked into his eyes. She was silent as he finished his visit with their dead sibling.

With a quiet softness in his voice, Sam bid his farewell. "Hey, Tom, I've got to go now." He took a deep breath and then allowed himself to disconnect from the moment. With a grin he looked over to his sister adding, "I need to show our little sister a thing or two about racing. See you later." With that he started to run towards the truck.

Katie was startled but quickly caught up with him. They reached the vehicle at the same moment.

"Darn it!" Katie cried, panting, "I was sure I'd beat you."

"Hey, Sis, it's just after basketball season. What do you think I've been doing for the last few months?"

"I guess. Still…"

"Still nothing." Deciding to concede a bit of victory he added, "Besides, I did get that little bit a head start." She gave him a smile and he continued. "Now, get in the truck and let's get back home. If you say there's a peach cobbler with my name on it, I want to get there now." As he watched his sister turn the key and start the drive home, he suddenly realized that he was hungry.


	24. April 14, 1974

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 24

April 14, 1974

It was a Sunday and Sam had just finished at the library where he'd been studying for his re-test in Agri-business. The professor had been greatly surprised at Sam's nose dive a few weeks before and had called Sam into his office. He explained that while he normally didn't offer re-tests, he was going to do so for the class. When Sam had asked why, he said that it had surprised him that his star student had flunked the test. He'd asked if there was anything bothering him and Sam had told him that he'd recently suffered a breakup with his fiancée.

The professor, Dr. Dickerson, had smiled kindly rationalizing that that these things happened. He figured that it wouldn't hurt to give the other students another chance as well and predicted that the scores would go up for the class overall. Sam thanked him and then decided that he was going to make sure he showed the instructor he could do the work. He'd spent the last two hours studying.

He had just left the library and was walking across the campus towards his dorm when he saw Peter Fisk. The man looked a little shocked and decided to find out what was going on. He hailed the man, "Hey, Pete. What's going on?"

His friends eyes held sadness as he turned towards him. "Didn't you hear the news? King Thunder's Tonic, was killed today in Detroit!"

"Who's that?" Sam asked, not sure what his friend was talking about.

"You don't know King Thunder? Don't you remember, that's the band I really like. I play their music all the time." The look Peter gave him made him wonder if he'd grown another head. "You once commented on how you liked their lyrics. They just recently came out with a new album, _Five All Night._"

Suddenly the memory of the band hit him. Tonic was the lead singer of the band that sported wild makeup and spiky hair. "Oh yeah. Isn't that the album with the song 'Fate's Wide Wheel?' It was pretty good."

Wide eyed, his friend answered, "Good?! It was flipping brilliant!" Pete's shoulders suddenly sank and he shook his head sadly, "I can't believe this happened."

"What are they saying happened?" He genuinely wanted to know now that he had a context to put the knowledge into.

His friend sighed. "According to the news it was some crazed fan. He killed Tonic with a knife and then disappeared into the crowd. They have no idea of who it was."

Sam shook his head, his voice saddened. "Wow. That's messed up."

"Yeah. Tell me about it." For a moment his friend was silent, but then curiosity hit. "I wonder what the band is going to do now?"

Shrugging, Sam replied, "I guess they'll get another lead singer."

"I guess."

After a moment, Sam continued, "Well, I'm heading back to the dorm." He put a hand on his friends shoulder, his voice indicating concern. "You okay now?"

The answer came with a nod. "Yeah. It's just that you don't expect this type of thing to happen to a singer. See you later, Sam." His friend turned towards the fraternity house he lived at.

Sam headed back to the dorm thinking how sad it was for such a talented man to lose his life so suddenly. Sometimes, you just couldn't fathom the things that happened in the world.


	25. April 20, 1974

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 25

April 19-20, 1974

"Katie did _what_?" Sam was shocked. He knew his sister wasn't very happy being the only one left at home, especially since Dad's heart attack made him a semi-invalid. But eloping? "Who'd she marry?"

He and his mother were in the kitchen during his spring break. She'd asked Sam to help her peeling the vegetables while they caught up with the news. His mother had just dropped this bombshell.

Almost too calm, his mother gave him the facts. "His name is Charles Parnell but he goes by Chuck. They met in high school. He was going to night school but had to meet with Mr. Matthews, the counselor. Katie was working in the office and met Chuck when he came in.

"He's seventeen too?"

Thelma put down the paring knife she was using. She pushed out a short breath that Sam knew meant his mother was upset. "No, he was held back a couple of times. He graduated last year from night school. He was age twenty then. He'll be twenty one in a month." From her tone of voice, Sam was sure that his mother wasn't happy.

This shocked Sam even more. "Geez, Mom, he's my age!" At the look on her face, he knew she was well aware of that fact. "When did you meet him?"

She picked the knife back up and began working on another potato. "We met him about a year ago. Katie was only sixteen when she introduced him. We tried to keep her from seeing him, but that just seemed to make it worse. All those times she told us she was spending the night at Sarah's she was meeting him." The peel slices flew off the tuber. "They'll be over tomorrow night while you're home."

Now it was Sam's turn to stop his kitchen prep duties. "I'm not sure I like the way this sounds."

"You've got company Sam," his mother answered, with controlled anger. "Neither Dad or I are really happy about it either but what's done is done." Resignation poured from his mother. It was obvious that she saw no other option.

"But Mom…" Sam tried to argue.

His mother cut him off. "Sam, Katie made a decision. They are legally married. I may not like it, but they are married. Now, let's just change the subject for now, all right?

"All right," Sam acquiesced. They continued talking, the conversation turning towards other things. It was good to be home with his family, even if events seemed to have gone in an unexpected direction.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

When Katie and her new husband showed up for dinner on Saturday night, Chuck was on his best behavior. Sam gave the man a long look, trying to gauge the type of man his sister had married.

Sam was twenty going on twenty-one himself. He'd certainly been interested in marrying Donna but this was totally different. This guy had wed a girl still firmly in high school whereas he'd been planning on 'tying the knot' with a woman ready to leave college. That his little sister was now a Mrs. was just too strange.

After the initial introductions and general small talk, Sam cut to the chase. "So Katie, how are you going to handle being married and finishing high school?"

Katie looked at her husband and then down at her hands which she held neatly folded in front of her. She seemed uncomfortable with the question. With her head still down, she mumbled softly, "Uh, well…I'm not. I'm dropping out of school."

Sam's reaction was immediate. "You're _what_! Katie, education is important."

She looked up and looked into her brother's eyes, begging him for understanding. "I'm..I'm planning on getting my G.E.D." She quickly looked back at Chuck who seemed to be getting tense at the line of questioning. "At least, that might happen. Chuck wants me at home. He said that he'll take care of things. He's got a really good job fixing cars down at Fred's Garage."

"G.E.D.! Geez, Katie! You can do better than that!" He couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"Chuck wants me at home," she repeated in a tone that demonstrated her agreement with the concept.

"But, Katie…." Sam voice dripped with concern

With a stern voice, Katie's husband answered. "She's my wife. We'll decide what's best for us, if you don't mind." His tone indicated that he expected that this would be the end of that particular conversation.

"Yeah, well…" Sam started but then his mother spoke up.

"Sam, Katie and Chuck are married now. They need to work things out themselves." Her eyes begged him to stop his questioning.

He couldn't understand. This was his little sister's future they were discussing. Still, he didn't want to upset his mother. "Okay, Mom, I just…"

Her eyes softened. "I know, Sam. But let's give them a little more time. They've only been married a month now."

Sam nodded, holding his tongue. He noticed that his father had been silent through this entire exchange. As he glanced at his face, he saw his Dad struggling with the same issues. He obviously was not at all happy with how this son-in-law was treating his "little girl." He too held his tongue and Sam took his cue from him.

The rest of the evening was equally strained. By the time Katie and Chuck left, Sam was sure there was something odd about his new brother-in-law.

Although Katie was supposed to come over the next day, she called to beg off saying she was feeling under the weather. Sam left to go back to school on Sunday without seeing his sister again.


	26. June 6, 1974

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 26

June 6, 1974

When Sam arrived home for summer break, he walked into a very chilly scene. His sister had called the day before to request that no one contact her again. She was cutting off all ties to her family.

Thelma and John Beckett had not taken this news well. They'd tried to get Katie to tell them what was wrong, begging her to talk about it first. Katie had been adamant, hanging up on her mother. When they tried to call back, the phone was never picked up.

Now Thelma Beckett looked a wreck and John wasn't doing any better. Sam decided to take matters into his own hands. Finding out where Katie and Chuck lived, he decided to pay them a visit, cut ties or not.

When Sam pulled up to the house, he noticed that everything was exactly perfect on the outside of the home. The grass was neatly cut, the walk swept clean, even the flowers on the porch seemed more picture perfect than a simple burst of color on the stoop. He walked to the door and knocked. No answer. He walked around to the garage and peeked in the window. There was a single car parked there. Going back to the front door, he knocked again, a little louder. Same response. None.

Sam went back to his car. Perhaps they'd gone out with some friends. He started up the car and pulled away. He decided to stop at the hardware store and call his mother to find out who those 'friends' might be.

As he was dialing, he saw out the window the car that had been parked in the garage at his sister's home. Chuck Parnell was at the wheel, but Katie was absent. Sam hung up the receiver. He had a gut feeling that things were not right. Returning to his sister's house, Sam again tried the front door, knocking loudly. When there was no answer, he went over to the window and looked inside. What he saw shocked and sickened him to the core. His sister's lip had been cracked open and she was holding a washcloth to her eye. Sam ran to the door, pounding on it. When his sister didn't answer, he broke it down.

"Not the door!" cried Katie, looking at the door like it was another ball she would have to juggle. "How am I gonna get the door fixed before Chuck gets home?" she murmured to herself.

"Katie! What happened?" Sam was concerned for his sister and was angry that she had obviously been hit by someone. Considering the fact that his brother-in-law had just left, he was certain he knew who that someone was.

The look in Katie's eyes wasn't angry or even sad. It was as if this was an everyday occurrence and had no significant meaning attached to it. "Oh this? It's nothing. I fell down the stairs." The words came out as rote. She saw the look on her brother's face and clarified. "I'm just so clumsy."

Sam licked his lips trying to think how to approach this. His sister wasn't acting at all like he felt she should. He decided to just be direct. "That type of injury doesn't come from falling. Did your husband do this to you? Did Chuck hit you?" As he said the words, anger began to drip from him. He found he couldn't stand still.

Katie wrung her hands, becoming agitated. She kept her eyes down, not willing to bring them up to look into his. Hesitantly, she answered him, "Uh, well…" She swallowed the lump in her throat and too quickly answered. "It was my fault, it really was. Chuck only hit me because I'm not doing things right. He just likes things done a certain way and I'm too stupid to do it right." Katie obviously expected this to calm her brother, as if his anger just wasn't justified.

Sam stopped moving and looked at his sister, not believing it was his little sister that was saying those words. "Katie. You're not stupid."

She nodded her head sadly. "Yes I am, Sam. Chuck says I'm about the stupidest person he's ever met. He says he can't understand why he married me."

Hearing his sister denigrate herself in this way was as painful to Sam as seeing the physical abuse clearly evident on her face. He put both of his hands on her shoulders but when she wouldn't look at him, took one hand and gently positioned her face to look into his. "Katie, Chuck's been feeding you what he wants you to believe. He's brainwashing you to think this is your fault. It isn't. Did you _ever_ see Dad do this to Mom?

Katie shook her head slightly and sadly murmured, "No, but Mom does things right. She does them the way Dad wants them done." She sighed deeply. "I wish I could get it right like she does, but I'm just too stupid."

"Stop saying that, Katie! You're not stupid!" He looked into her eyes, using his gaze to keep her engaged in his voice. "Mom doesn't always do what Dad says. You know that. They've had squabbles before about different things. You've heard them, the same as I have. But they work things out and they _never_ hurt each other. They certainly don't put each other down or use physical violence."

Shaking his hands off of her, his sister walked away, folding her arms over her chest and keeping her back to her brother. "But Chuck loves me, Sam. He just wants me to be the perfect wife."

Sam shook his head adamantly and rawly voiced, "Not like this, Katie. _Never_ like this. You need to leave him. Get an annulment. This isn't right! Get your things and come with me now." The tone in his voice held a promise out to her that by doing so, he'd protect her.

Katie wanted to believe her big brother, believe she wasn't the cause of all the pain she'd experienced over the past four months. Chuck had been more or less gentle to her before they had eloped. Oh, occasionally he lit into her, but nothing physical. More telling her how incapable she was and how he would take care of her if she'd just marry him.

After they were married, things started to change. After the first time Chuck had met her brother, he'd insisted that she never see him again. He said that Sam wasn't a good influence on her, that he'd just try filling her head with stupid ideas like finishing high school. When she argued that Sam was really smart and that none of his ideas were stupid, Chuck had backhanded her, sending her into the wall and cracking the plaster.

"Look what you made me do!" he had bellowed at her, angrily getting into her face, spittle at the edges of his mouth. "Now I'll have to get the wall fixed! That's going to cost money we don't have!"

When she tried to point out that if he hadn't pushed her into the wall to begin with, the plaster wouldn't be cracked, he hit her again and again, telling her to shut up. He'd screamed at her that there was nothing he wanted to hear from her, nothing that would be worth hearing from such a stupid little slut.

Katie had pulled herself to the bedroom after he stopped hitting her and had left the house to go to the bar. He sneered that she'd gotten him upset and now he needed a drink to calm down. She'd rocked herself in the corner of the room, trying to figure out what she'd done to cause this to happen. Maybe if she could figure it out, she could prevent its reoccurrence. She continue to rock herself until he'd come home after the bar closed down. He'd told her to stop being stupid and come to bed. When she'd tried to snuggle up to him, he'd pushed her away saying he was too tired.

Over the next couple of months, she did everything she could to be the perfect wife that Chuck wanted her to be. She even called her parents at his insistence, telling them that she was cutting off all ties to the family. She knew it would hurt her Mother and Father, but as Chuck had said, they just didn't get how stupid she really was. Better to get away from them before they realized that their daughter had nothing but rocks in her head.

Then, today, Chuck had been getting ready for work when he looked out the window and saw her brother walking up the walkway. She'd wanted to open the door and tell Sam that everything was fine but she wouldn't be having anything to do with the Beckett side of the family now that she was a Parnell; that she'd moved on and would be following the Biblical imperative that she should cleave to her husband. She was sure that Sam would understand and leave. Then she could go back to learning how to be perfect for Chuck.

It hadn't worked that way, though. Chuck had pulled her roughly into the bedroom and held his hand over her mouth until her brother left. He'd cursed her brother as a meddling idiot. When Sam had finally driven off, Chuck had hit her across the face cracking her lip and then hit her again, blackening her eye. He'd screamed at her that now he'd be late for work and it was her fault if he got docked since she had such a difficult family.

Now Sam was telling her that Chuck had been wrong. But Chuck couldn't be wrong. He'd explained it all to her so carefully. She was the one causing all the problems. Something in her wanted to believe Sam, wanted to believe that it wasn't her fault. Sam had never led her astray before. She decided to believe him.

She nodded. "Okay, Sam. I'll leave with you. Help me get my things together."

As they pulled her meager belongings together and put them into a suitcase, Sam felt angry and saddened at the same time that his brother-in-law could do this to his sister and that his sister would buy into it. He carried the suitcase out to the car. He told her he would take her to the hospital and call the police. Katie stopped moving towards the car. "Sam, I can't do that. If you do, I'll just turn around and go back in. I don't want to get Chuck in trouble."

"But Katie," he pleaded, "look what he did to you."

"Sam, I'm at least as much to blame here. Those are my terms. Either we drop it or I go back inside the house."

Sam figured that getting Katie to leave was a big first step so he held his tongue. They could go into the other later. Yes, getting her away from the monster she'd married was definitely the only thing to do.

When they arrived home, both his mother and father had been livid, calling Chuck a brute. Katie had jumped to defend him and Sam had to defuse the situation by insisting that everyone just calm down. Decisions could be made later. Katie had gone up to her old room. Sam could hear her crying and he wanted to go comfort her. First, though, he had to help his parents understand that Katie wasn't the little girl they had known just a few short months before; that somehow Chuck had gotten her to believe that she was causing all the problems. They would have to step lightly for awhile.

Sam called the Terre Haute Domestic Violence hotline. They told him that in many cases, the victim would return again and again to the abuser before (if they ever did) leaving them. They agreed that not pushing too hard but calmly and firmly restating the truth would be the best way to help. They also indicated that counseling was available. Finally, they provided their most chilling statement. They said that when a victim left, they were at the greatest risk to their life.

He'd hung up the phone and went to Katie, telling her what he had learned, except for the last. He'd tell her that later. He encouraged her to seek help. She said she'd think about it.


	27. June 10, 1974

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 27

June 10, 1974

The past four days had been surreal. In many ways, they were the family they'd always been, but in others, the fabric was fraying badly.

They'd convinced Katie to talk with a counselor and had discussed taking out a restraining order although she was still unwilling to press charges. Her lip was healing and her eye had taken on the greenish tint of a healing wound.

Sam was feeling confident that things were progressing well. Katie seemed to be returning to the sister he remembered when he'd left for college. They'd spent much of the last four days sitting on the porch swing and just talking, Sam of school and Katie of her thoughts and feelings. For the first few days she wouldn't talk about the situation with her husband. Eventually, she began to open up and explain why she'd started dating Chuck

Sam found it hard to hear Katie tell him that she'd always figured that when Sam was born; all the brains that were left in the Beckett gene pool had gone to him. Tom got his share and then Sam took the rest. She said that by the time she came along, there was nothing left.

When Chuck entered her life, she was in her sophomore year in high school and was bringing home B's and C's with a sprinkling of D's. She'd even flunked Spanish. Mom and Dad had encouraged her do better, telling her that she was a smart girl but she didn't believe they were right. She really tried, but no matter how much studying she did, it just never seemed to make a difference. She knew that Mom and Dad must be comparing her progress to Tom's and Sam's and she just couldn't win that game.

Then Chuck had told her that he wasn't interested in her brain. He was interested in her. He told her he loved her bubbling personality, that he'd never seen a more beautiful woman, and that he loved her for who she was. He was older too, about Sam's age, so it pleased her that he'd been interested in such a mental slug.

Tears came to Sam's eyes as he heard her speak. Had he been that blind to his sister's pain? He'd always seen her as so upbeat, so together. He'd been in awe of her ability to make friends as soon as she met someone. Katie didn't have a shy bone in her body. He didn't get her put down of her academic ability either. While she didn't always do as well on tests and such, she was no slouch on the comprehension of material. She was like his first year roommate, Pete, in that way. She'd know the material cold going into a test, but then her own anxiety would make her second guess her answers. Sam had helped Pete by showing him how martial arts training could help him slow down his thought process and choose the best answers or compose an essay on the fly. Katie just needed that lesson too. This summer would be a good time to teach her those skills.

Sam reached over and hugged Katie tightly. "I'm sorry. I should have been a better big brother. I just didn't know."

"That's okay, Sam," she said hugging him back. "I love you being my brother."

"Well, now that you're on your way again, things will be better. Katie, you're a lot smarter than you think you are. Believe me, you weren't shortchanged on brains. Yours just works a little differently then mine and Tom's and that's okay." Sam looked into Katie's eyes. "I'll be here this summer. I can help you with techniques that will help you in school and when I go back to Purdue, you can call me at school if there's anything you need - even if it's just to talk. I'm here for you Sis. I'll always be here for you when you need me." He kissed her forehead and gave her another hug.

Katie returned this hug as well. She asked if he could bring his guitar out on the porch. She'd missed hearing him play. He retrieved it from his room and they sat out on the porch swing singing until they were called into dinner.

Both cleaned up and then headed to the dinner table. His mother had made all of Katie's favorites, ginger beef over rice and snow peas. Katie had once told him that that meal seemed so exotic.

Sam thought about that as he looked at the food on the table before bowing his head as his father said grace. He realized that all Katie had ever known was the area of Indiana that she'd grown up in. Her sole experience away was when she'd gone to New York to hear him play at Carnegie Hall. Sam made a decision. He had the summer off. He'd planned to work the farm but he figured that Katie was more important. She needed to be shown how special and wonderful she was. He decided to take her to the beach. He wasn't sure where yet, but he could plan that and surprise her in July. That would give them all a little time to get this horrible situation under control.

His head came up as the grace was finished.

"Ezra says that the corn's coming up nicely," said his father, picking up a the bowl of rice and dishing a serving on his plate.

"Yeah," said Sam taking a sip of milk. "I was out in the fields earlier today. If we get enough rain this summer, I'm sure it's going to be a real bumper crop. I'm going to help him with the weeding tomorrow."

John nodded. "That's good, son." He turned to Katie, smiling. "Your mother is planning to put up some strawberry jam tomorrow. I'd sure like to taste some that had my little girls name on it."

Katie stopped buttering her roll. "I'm not a little girl anymore, Dad. I'm a woman. A married woman."

John looked over to Thelma. "I know you've grown up Katie. That you're not really little anymore. I just meant that you'll always be my little girl."

His daughter sighed. "I know that daddy. It just that…"

Thelma chimed in. "Katie. I know you think you're totally grown up but you're still only seventeen. You have your whole life ahead of you. You've got to give it time."

Sam decided that maybe holding his idea as a surprise might not be the best plan. "Um. Yeah. You're probably just tired of seeing the same old stuff. How'd you like to go on a little vacation, Sis? Just you and me. I was thinking the beach but you can decide."

Katie's eyes lit up. "Could we go to the mountains? I love those songs that John Denver is always singing about Colorado. I think I'd like to see those 'cathedral mountains.'"

Sam nodded slowly. "Yeah. We could go to Colorado. It would certainly be cooler than the beach in July."

Thelma looked over to John smiling. "Looks like we may have the house to ourselves again for awhile."

Sam gave his mother a wry grin. "You saying you want to get rid of us?"

With a small laugh, she shook her head. "Not at all. It sounds like a lovely trip. I think it will do both of you a world of good."

They continued to talk about plans for the summer. By the time they went to bed, things in the house seemed more normal than they had for sometime.


	28. June 17, 1974

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 28

June 17, 1974

Katie was going stir-crazy. Although she was much happier being at home where she knew her family would provide their love and support and wouldn't hurt her mentally or physically, she had been out from under this particular roof for several months. While she wanted to leave her most recent life with Chuck, she didn't want to trade it for going back to being the sole Beckett child at the farm. Currently Sam was there, but that would change soon enough when he went back to school.

Sam had said he needed to go into town for a few things and offered to have Katie join him. She jumped at the chance. Besides, she needed to get a few things herself, especially if she was going to go on vacation with Sam early in July. Chuck had limited what Katie wore, throwing out most of her clothes when she had moved into the house with him. He said she didn't need anything her parents had provided for her. He'd be the only one to provide what she wore.

The house was owned by Chuck's grandparents. They had moved to Florida the previous year and allowed the house to be rented out by Chuck's parents, who resided in Indianapolis where Chuck's father was a state legislator. After Chuck and Katie had eloped, the Parnell's had let them live in the home rent free as long as Chuck covered any other bills associated with setting up house. He'd indicated to her the need to keep things perfect. He wasn't going to have his grandparent's house trashed. He expected her to keep it spotless and in good repair. Once, when he noticed a scuff mark on the wall – Katie was sure it was there when they moved in – he'd smacked her hard enough to bloody her nose. She'd been afraid it had been broken but it healed okay.

Sam headed off to the music store where his recent order of some sheet music had arrived. He'd decided to delve into other formats of music after his concert at Carnegie Hall the previous year. Andrew Ross had pointed him in some directions that challenged his considerable skills.

Katie entered the Ladybug Shop, the little clothing store that had graced the small downtown of Elk Ridge for many years, when she heard a voice calling her.

"Katie Beckett! No it's Parnell now, isn't it? Where have you been? I've been trying to reach you for months. Nobody ever answered at the number you gave me." It was Elaine, one of Katie's best friends before Chuck had told her she needed to "lose those losers." He felt she needed no one but him.

"Oh, we had some problems with our phone," Katie lied. At that moment, she realized that she had changed. Being with Chuck had done that to her. Maybe she didn't have the brains Sam said she had after all. "I'll let you know when I have a working number again." She couldn't let Elaine know that not only had she failed at school but also as a wife and that she'd run home to Mommy and Daddy.

"Want some help picking things out, like we used to do?" Elaine asked hopefully.

"Uh, no, that's okay. I just wanted to see if anything new had come in." She glanced around quickly. "Guess not. Well, I really need to get back. I'll give you a call sometime."

Elaine was absolutely stunned at how Katie was acting. They were best friends, or had been before Katie had met Chuck. Then, slowly at first, Katie had pulled away from her. They just didn't talk anymore. She hadn't seen or heard from Katie since a month before her elopement. She was still miffed that she'd had to learn about that through other friends.

Thus Elaine has some heat in her voice when she finally spoke. "Katie, you obviously don't want to talk or get together. Just forget it." Katie cringed as her previous best friend turned and walked out the door.

Katie's face turned red. Why couldn't she have just started to mend the fences instead of pushing Elaine away? She felt even lower. Maybe she deserved what she'd been experiencing after all. Maybe she was just as stupid as Chuck said she was.

She looked around the shop again but any joy in finding new clothes had been effectively dampened. She decided to find Sam and see about going back to the farm. Right after passing the tavern on the way to the music store, she felt her arm pulled suddenly and roughly. She turned around to face Chuck. On the surface, he had a charming smile and a quiet voice. But the pressure on her arm was hurting. He'd obviously seen her leaving the small clothing store.

"Well, well. My wife is out shopping today. Find anything, darling?"

"Chuck, let me go. You're hurting me," Katie whined, trying to get out of his hold.

He shook his head. "Not a chance, honey bun. Why don't you come on into the Tavern with me? I've almost finished my beer. Then we can head on home. You know that's where you belong, Katie. A wife should be with her husband."

Noticing that there was no one around to hear, Katie made her plea. "Chuck, I want to come with you but I don't want to be hurt anymore."

With a smile befitting a great white, her husband answered, "Oh, baby. I won't. I promise I won't ever hurt you again. You know I was just under some stress. It'll be okay now. Just come home with me. You'll see."

Katie started faltering, moving closer to him. He lessened the grip he had on her. "You promise, Chuck? It will be like it was at first?"

Chuck continued to grin. "Of course, honey. Didn't I always say I'd take care of you?"

Suddenly, a hand reached up and caused Chuck to lose his grip on her arm entirely. "Get away from her," came the command.

"Oh joy, it's your brother." Chuck voice was sarcastic and the look in his eyes showed pure hatred. He turned to Sam, narrowing his eyes. "Why don't you mind your own business?"

"My sister is my business." Sam was pulling Katie around so that he would provide a shield for her.

Katie tried to come to the front, but Sam was blocking her. "Sam, it's all right. Chuck was just apologizing."

Sam turned and looked at Katie, pain in his eyes. "Don't you remember what the counselors said, Sis? They said he'd try that. I don't want you to be hurt anymore."

She pulled herself up, the top of her head just above his chest. "I can take care of myself, Sam."

"Yeah, Sam." Chuck said his voice with a sneer. "You shouldn't meddle in married people's lives."

Several of the town's people had stopped to see what was going on as they noticed the three people outside the tavern. Chuck reached back suddenly, obviously planning to slug Sam. As his fist flew towards Sam's face, it was blocked and Sam grabbed his arm and pulled it around his back. "Katie, go to the car."

"But Sam…"

"You heard me. Go to the car."

Chuck was livid. He struggled to get free but grimaced as he realized that in that position, he wouldn't be able to. Sam had too strong a grip on him. "Let me go you jerk. You can't keep me from my wife."

"She won't be your wife for much longer," Sam barked back.

Chuck snarled, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means that an annulment is in the works, you bastard." Sam tightened the arm against the man's back, causing Chuck to grimace.

"I'll never agree to an annulment. She's my wife and I'll see that she's returned to me."

Sam said clearly but with heat in his voice. "You're not coming near her again, you hear me?! I'll make sure of that! You try coming within an inch of my sister and you'll pay dearly."

Sam looked over to the car and noticed that Katie was in the passenger side looking very uncomfortable, almost in tears. He released his hold on Chuck, backing away from him with his hands splayed as the man glared at him. He noticed that people were staring at the two of them.

"You'll regret this, Beckett. I guarantee this isn't over!"

Sam didn't say a word in response. He slipped into the driver's side and turned over the engine. He pulled the car away from the curb and headed out of town.

Katie looked over to him. "Why did you do that, Sam? He was apologizing. He promised he wouldn't hurt me anymore. I'm his wife."

Sam looked at Katie, sorrow streaming from his eyes. "Katie, you can't go back to him. He's still drinking and he'll say anything to have you return. Don't you remember how miserable you were? Haven't the counselors told you what happens with these abusive types? If you go back, you'll regret it."

Katie nodded her head down. "But Sam, who else would ever want me? I'm such a loser."

Sam realized that his sister still had a long way to go before recovering from her time with Chuck. "You're not a loser, Katie. There is so much to love inside of you. You'll find someone, I promise. Someone who will treat you like the beautiful, sensitive woman you are!" Sam couldn't believe that the little sister he'd always known could be brought down this far by the man whose lies she'd chosen to believe.

They reached the Beckett home quickly and Katie left to go into the house. She barely said hello to her parents but, rather, rushed up to her room.

Sam walked in, noticing the looks of confusion on his parent's faces. "Chuck was in town."

His mother and father looked to each other and back to Sam. "What happened?" asked John.

"Um, we got into a little verbal altercation and I pulled his hand off Katie and put it behind his back. The people in town sort of noticed something going on." Sam's voice began to rise just a bit as anger tinted his words. "I can't believe how much he's brainwashed Katie. She thinks she's a loser and has nothing to offer anyone!"

"That's crazy, Sam!" His mother was shocked at this epiphany. "Katie's a wonderful girl."

"I know that, Mom and you know that. But Katie doesn't believe it." Sam went over to the phone book and started looking for a number.

"What are you doing, Sam?" his father asked.

"I'm calling the police. We need to get a retraining order. Keep Chuck away from her."

The three of them looked at each other and nodded as Sam dialed the number.


	29. June 18, 1974

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 29

June 18, 1974

The next morning, Katie and Sam went to the courthouse to obtain a retraining order. The resulting document indicated that Chuck Parnell was to have no contact with Katie Beckett Parnell and she could only be contacted through a neutral third party source. Sam now felt that things were looking up. If Chuck would stay away from her, they could get her the help she needed to regain her self-esteem.

Katie was silent as they drove back to the farmhouse. Sam tried to ask her what she was thinking of but she said she didn't want to talk. When they got home, she again made a bee-line to her room. Sam decided to work his nervous energy off doing chores.

He'd been out in the field when his mother called him in. "Phone call, Sam."

"Who is it, Mom?"

"It's Donna."

Sam wasn't sure if this was a good sign or not. When Donna had broken off the engagement, he'd been devastated. He'd so wanted to spend his life with her. He understood, however, that her dream was to go into quantum physics research and that a farm in rural Indiana didn't fit her requirements. He came in and took the phone from his mother. "Hello?"

"Hi, Sam." Her voice was flat, as if she were trying not to show any emotion whatsoever.

"What do you want, Donna?" Sam felt if he cut to the chase, the agony of the phone call would be over quicker.

Donnas seemed to sense Sam's feelings and met his desire to finish the call as quickly as possible "Well, when I was packing my things to leave Lawrence, I came across your copy of Brigadoon. I thought you might like it back."

Sam thought about it. He'd received it as a gift for his eighth birthday. "Yeah, thanks Donna. I would. My Grandmother gave that to me."

"Okay. I thought it might be special to you. I'll pack it up and send it to you."

"Thanks."

Concern entered Donna's voice as she asked, "Are you doing all right?"

Sam's emotions answered the concern that Donna had voiced. "Yeah. Well, as well as can be expected." He decided he needed to let her know how he felt. "I still love you, Donna."

"I know. I love you too." Donna's next words dashed any hopes he might have still harbored. "It just wouldn't work between us, Sam. We want different things. This is for the best."

Sam sighed, resigned to the reality. "I suppose so. I do wish you happiness, Donna, in whatever you do."

"You too, Sam. Bye. Have a good life."

"Bye, Donna." Sam's eyes were tearing as he hung up the phone. His mother came around the corner.

Thelma took in the vision of her son, his body language indicating great pain. "Everything okay, Sam?"

Sam's eyes told the story. "Ah, Mom. I still love her. It really hurts to know I won't be with her ever again."

Thelma took her son into her arms. "I know, Sam. Time will heal this wound." She hugged him tighter as she felt his tears swallowed by the cloth on her shoulder.

After a few moments he pulled away. "I'm going for a walk, Mom. I don't know if I'll be back by supper."

"Okay, Sam." Thelma knew that Sam would head out to the cornfields and find a place to be alone. He'd always gone there whenever he was troubled. She remembered the first time Sam had done so. He was six and had come in from school at the end of the first week, a black eye just beginning to show its colors.

_She quickly rushed to her son, taking a close look at the injury. "What happened, Sam?" she asked with great concern._

_Sam shrugged. "Nothing, Mom."_

_Thelma went over to the freezer and pulled out some ice, wrapping it in a towel and putting it up against Sam's face. "That eye is telling me more than nothing. Did you get into a fight?"_

"_No," Sam shook his head._

"_Don't lie to me, Sam," she stated with a little warning in her voice._

_Sam looked up at her, begging her to believe him. "I'm not, Mom. 'I' didn't fight."_

"_What?" She looked into his eyes and saw the sincerity there._

_He looked down and with barely a whisper answered, "They held me down and hit me."_

"_They did WHAT!" Seeing Sam jump just a little she asked, "Why would they do that?"_

_Her little boy sighed before explaining, "The teacher told me I had to go to sixth grade math class. She said I couldn't stay with the other kids. The sixth graders said they didn't want a baby in their class. When the teacher said that I was the only one to get an A on the pre-test she gave us today, some of the boys said they'd get me for showing them up."_

_Thelma tilted her head, "Didn't you tell anyone?"_

"_No," was his simple answer._

_Thelma couldn't believe what she was hearing. "Why not?"_

"_Cause when I said something earlier this week, they did this." Sam pulled up his shirt and Thelma was shocked to see the bruises that had formed around his stomach._

_She went over to the phone, ready to call the school. Sam had pleaded with her not to, saying it would make it worse. Thelma decided to wait until she could talk to John about what to do. Sam had just told her he was going outside for awhile._

_Later, when John came back from town where he'd gone to get udder balm for the cows, she told him what had happened. Tom came home from Junior High School and heard his parents talking. John was angrier than anyone in the Beckett house had ever seen him. He told Tom to go and find his brother._

_Tom looked for Sam everywhere he could think of, but couldn't find him. His parents joined the search for his little brother. It was near twilight and they were getting worried that something even worse had happened to him and decided if they didn't find him within the next ten minutes, they would call the police. They finally found him sitting in the cornfield at the back edge of the farm. They asked him what he was doing and he told them he was "just thinking." _

_They brought him back to the house. John told Sam he didn't have to take this abuse from the other children. It was wrong. He told Sam he was going to contact the principal and get to the bottom of it. The next day, the boys who had beat Sam up were called into the office finding their parents there as well. The boys were told that if Sam Beckett was beat up again, they would be expelled from school. _

_Later Thelma had heard that Tom had also paid the boys a visit before the office call and told each of them that if they touched his brother again, he'd make sure that any damage they did to him would be doubled on them. That it was a promise and not a threat._

Whichever message had gotten to the boys, Sam had never been beat up again. But whenever he was troubled, she knew they could find him out in those cornfields. Tonight was no different. When Sam walked in a little after dark, she could smell the scent of the new corn on him.


	30. June 20, 1974

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 30

June 20, 1974

Sam found his sister sitting on the porch swing. He sat down beside her, concerned about the look on her face that showed she was in some distress. With all the things that had been happening lately, he wanted to know the cause of it. "A penny for your thoughts, Sis."

Katie looked up at him, her forehead creased. "I left it at the house, Sam," she answered cryptically.

Sam tilted his head, confused. "You left what at what house?"

Katie sighed. "Grandma Nettie's china tea cup." The look on her face showed how upset she was that she no longer had the prized possession in her care.

"The one with the flowers on it?" Sam knew that Katie only remembered their grandmother through the stories that others had told through the years. She'd simply been too young when the woman who had been so close to he and Tom had passed on. The tea cup had always been the connection to her for his sister.

Katie nodded, a sadness crossing her face. "Yeah. When we packed up the day I left the house, I forgot I had it on the top of the armoire in the bedroom. I hid it there because Chuck didn't want me to keep it." Her voice grew softer, almost a whisper, as if telling a great secret that no one should know. "I told him I'd thrown it away, but I hadn't."

Sam he knew this was something he couldn't just let go. Grandma Nettie had left the cup and saucer to Katie when she had passed on. It was a delicate antique and Katie had loved it. "We can still get it, Katie. We can go in when he's not there."

She looked unsure, but hopeful. "You think we can? You'll go with me?" A spark of the sister Sam remembered lit up her eyes.

He nodded. "That's the only way I'll let you go back in that house," he said with a slight grin. He reached into his pocket to retrieve his keys. "We can go now if you want."

Katie nodded. "Yeah. He's probably having lunch right now, but he'll be going back to work soon."

They headed out, parking not far from the house, in an alleyway that had a view of the house. They waited until they saw Chuck pass by in his car and then pulled into the driveway of Katie's former home. Sam noticed that the yard wasn't quite as nice as the first day he'd seen the house. The walk wasn't swept and the flowers didn't look as if they'd been cared for.

Katie put the key in the lock of the hastily repaired door. She could imagine how upset Chuck had been when he'd returned home to find the door broken. A chill went down her spine as she realized how he would have beaten her for allowing it to happen. Turning the key, she felt relief that it still worked and she and Sam stepped into the room that no longer was in immaculate order. Knowing how particular Chuck was about her housekeeping, she was surprised.

"I'll just be a moment, Sam." she said, pulling a chair from the dinette set and taking it with her into the bedroom. Setting it close to the rear of the armoire, she stood on it, reaching across the back of the tall piece of furniture, and smiled as her hand touched the treasured object. The cup was still there.

Carefully removing the cup and saucer from its hidden position, she held it close to her. "I've got it, Sam." She handled the heirloom to him as she climbed down, retrieving it from him once she was on the floor again.

He smiled at her as he returned it to her, glad to see her smile as she looked at the cup, brushing the dust from it. "Is there anything else you left, Katie?" He didn't want to have to make this trip again. Standing in the location that had held so much pain for his sister upset him.

As she walked out into the living room, holding the cup and saucer in her hands carefully she answered, "No, there's nothing in the house that I want anymore." She started heading towards the front door when she stopped suddenly, her eyes widening with fear.

"What is it, Katie," asked Sam, confused and concerned with her change in demeanor.

He body began to shake to match the fear in her eyes. With a whisper she answered, "Chuck just pulled up."

Immediately, Sam tensed. "How do you know it's him? He shouldn't be back for hours."

She nodded towards the door. "His car has a particular sound. You hear that knocking sound?" She looked around as if seeking a place to hide. "Oh, God, Sam. What am I going to do?"

Sam took her shoulders and looked her in the eyes, calming her. "You're going to do nothing. You're just picking up your property from what was your house. He's the one with a restraining order against him." He realized that it probably didn't cover her now as they had entered Chuck's house, but Katie didn't need to know that.

A moment later the door opened and Chuck Parnell swaggered in. A cruel smile curled on his face. "Well lookie here. My wife has come to her senses and come back home."

Katie started to shake and her voice was unsteady as she answered, "No Chuck. I just came back to get my grandmother's teacup."

A derisive laugh left him and he pointed to the pieces of porcelain in her hands. "That piece of junk? I thought you'd thrown it away."

Katie's voice tinged with anger. "It's not junk, Chuck. It's all I have left from Grandmother Nettie."

Chuck shook his head. "I told you that you need to forget about the Beckett side of your family." He looked into her eyes, "They aren't necessary."

Sam spoke up then, "The Becketts take care of their own, Chuck." He reached over and took Katie's upper arm gently; ready to guide her out of the house. "Now, if you'll excuse us, we'll be leaving now." He started to take a step towards the front door when he stopped in his tracks as Chuck pulled out a .40 caliber Smith and Wesson that he'd been carrying concealed under his denim jacket. He aimed it at Sam's chest.

Chuck's voice held deep malice towards Sam, his words backed up in his mind with the firepower in his hand. "You talk big but I wonder how big you are now."

Katie's face went white as the blood drained from her face. Surely Chuck wouldn't hurt Sam. He must be bluffing. Her voice was shaking as she whimpered, "Chuck, put down the gun."

Chuck turned to her, the gun still raised but his focus on her. "Your brother needs to stay out of our business, Katie. Your whole family is out to convince you to leave me." His voice suddenly got soft and his words honeyed. "Come on, Katie. You know you're my girl. I want you to stay here in our home with me. I know I hurt you and I promise, I'll change. I promise I'll never hurt you again if you just come home."

Katie again started to falter. Chuck's actions said one thing but his words were what she wanted to hear. Maybe he was just doing this to get her to listen, using extreme measures to do so. "Could it really be like that, Chuck?" She asked, hope in her voice.

Sam watched this interchange in disbelief. It was as if his sister had been mesmerized by his words. "Katie! You can't believe him! Don't you…"

Before Sam could finish his sentence, Chuck turned sharply towards him. "Stop your meddling or I'm going to stop it for you." He again raised the gun at Sam's chest.

"No, Chuck!" Katie screamed at him but Chuck didn't care. This meddling brother was going to be stopped, even if he had to do it. He'd put half-jacket hollow point rounds his cousin had obtained for him into the gun. They were just waiting for him to use them.

Katie rushed between Chuck and Sam figuring that Chuck wouldn't harm her, at least not with a gun. He might hit her, but that was different. She was sure of it.

Chuck, though, had already started to pull the trigger. In less than a blink of an eye, the round left the barrel and instead of blowing apart in the chest of the meddling brother, it contacted with his wife's head. For an instant, her eyes flew wide then they simply ceased to exist. The legacy from her grandmother left her hands, hitting the floor and shattering into a thousand shards, forming the nest into which her body slid

Sam felt something warm and moist fly into him seconds before Katie's body dropped to the floor. He registered the soft red, hard white and chunky gray mix that had landed on his face and chest. As he realized what was covering him, he lost all conscious thought red haze becoming his entire world. All he could feel was rage, his body moving forward, his hands and feet moving automatically and mechanically. His martial arts training came to the fore, but without the discipline that normally accompanied the moves.

When Sam came to his senses again, Chuck was on the floor, bloodied and grabbing at his throat. A part of Sam's mind registered that he'd probably crushed his windpipe. Chuck's face was turning blue as he struggled for the air his lungs needed for life. Sam didn't care. The man had just violently killed his little sister and he simply didn't care what happened to him.

Sam turned to Katie's body. What was left of her head held nothing that looked like his sister. The white of bone peeked out from a bloody mass. There was so much blood. Sam dropped to the floor and took her in his arms gently rocking her; rhythmically moving back and forth; crying and telling her how sorry he was that he'd let this happen. He wasn't sure how long he stayed like that cradling the body of his sister but the next thing he vaguely remembered was seeing two deputies from the county Sheriff's office breaking into the room.

The scene they found was a carnage seldom seen in Elk Ridge, Indiana. Of the three people in the room, one was certainly dead, the second was likely so, and the third was incoherent and covered with blood.

"Jesus Christ! What the hell happened here?" one of the deputies yelled.

They checked the male victim, knowing the female was already dead. One couldn't sustain a head wound of that magnitude and live. Checking the male's pulse, they found none and realized that he indeed was dead. While the coroner would be required to fully determine the cause of death, it was obvious that the man had been brutally beaten.

One of the deputies approached Sam, still holding his sister and covered in her blood and other evidence of her violent end. The Deputy pried her from the arms of the sobbing young man. Roughly, he pulled Sam to a standing position and pushed him against the wall. As he patted him down, he recited his Miranda rights, a rote soliloquy. "You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be provided for. Do you understand these rights as I have explained them to you?"

Sam's head bobbed, not in understanding but in shocked answer to the question. He felt the handcuffs tightly applied to his wrists behind his back. _A nightmare! This can only be a nightmare! I lost Tom to Vietnam and if this isn't a nightmare, I've just lost Katie to that bastard husband of hers! It just can't be true! Why can't I wake up! _

He looked down at his chest seeing the mix of blood, bone, and brains that had once been his sister's head attached to the fabric of his shirt and drying into a sickening layer. This was real. He suddenly pitched forward and retched. The police officer that held his arms grimaced at the sight.

Sam tasted the sour bile that lingered in his mouth. _Oh God! This isn't a nightmare I'll ever wake up from! This is a nightmare that will haunt me the rest of my life."_

He barely felt himself being lead out the door and down to the waiting patrol car. He was pushed into the back seat behind the steel mesh that separated him from the driver. He was numb, simply numb. A moment later, the car started forward and Sam knew without a doubt that life would never again be the same.


	31. June 21, 1974

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 31

June 21, 1974

The night before was a blur. He'd been brought into the booking area of the county jail where they'd taken his clothing and issued him a jumpsuit to wear while incarcerated. He'd submitted to the process of fingerprinting followed by having three pictures of his head taken - one straight on and the other two in profile, recording both sides of his face. Once the initial processing was completed, they were going to take him to interrogation but he'd asked if he could make a phone call first. The detective had nodded reluctantly but had taken him to a phone. He called his home.

The phone picked up and a male voice answered, "Beckett residence."

For a moment he didn't know what to say. "Dad?" he asked tentatively, not exactly sure how to tell his father what had occurred.

"Sam?"

At his name, the words flowed out, rushing in a flood, "Oh God, Dad! Katie's dead!"

"What the hell?!" His father's voice had held disbelief and anger.

Sam turned to the wall, his eyes shut tight. "Katie's dead. Chuck shot her."

His father's voice exploded. "That bastard! I'll kill him, I swear by all that's holy, I'll kill him!" Sam had never heard his father speak like this but understood that he meant every word he was saying. In some ways, it was a relief to tell him he didn't need to.

"He's dead too, Dad." Sam heard silence on the other side of the other side of the phone. He continued quietly, the semi-confession coming to his lips, afraid of how they would be taken. "Dad, I think I killed him. I think I crushed his windpipe. They've booked me into the county jail."

Silence again. Tears began to trickle down Sam's face as he waited to hear his father's verdict.

"Dad, are you there?"

Finally he heard him speak, a tired sadness present in the words. "Yes, Sam. I'll call our lawyer, Doc Crosnah. You just keep your mouth shut until you see him."

"I already told them that Chuck shot Katie and that I don't remember anything after that." It was true. Everything after Katie's death was a blur of images, a sort of surreal macabre montage in his mind.

His father's voice was adamant. "Sam, don't say anymore." Sam wasn't certain but he thought he caught the sound of fear tingeing his father's words. "Sometimes what you say can be twisted. I know why you did it, Son, but for now, just keep quiet. Mr. Crosnah will be there soon."

"Okay, Dad." he agreed readily. Sam faltered for a moment, swallowing tightly before confessing. "Dad, I'm scared."

The words were compassionate now and Sam felt some relief as he took them in. "Yeah, I'd imagine so. Just sit tight, Sam. We'll get through this."

He knew he wasn't alone. "Okay."

His father cleared his throat. "I need to make that phone call now. Your mother and I will be right down after that, Sam." Gently, he gave Sam an order. "Hang up the phone now, son."

Sam didn't want to. He wanted to hold onto the only thread left for him. But he obeyed. "Okay. Bye." He took the receiver and placed it in its cradle slowly. The police officer who had been sitting a slight distance away, watching him stood up and indicated the direction he should move to go to the interrogation room.

When they arrived, Sam was seated in a chair and two detectives came in to question him. He stated simply that he wished to see his lawyer before saying any more than he had on the drive to the jail. The two detectives looked at each other before nodding. Sam was taken to his cell to await the arrival of his attorney.

His cell. It sounded absurd. Never in his wildest dreams would he ever have believed that he'd be in this situation. He walked to the location indicated and soon found himself the sole occupant of a small five by eight foot room. He lay down on his side upon the bunk attached to the back wall. His back was turned to the room as his eyes faced the painted cinderblock wall to which the bed was attached. Pulling himself subconsciously into a fetal position, he brought his knees to his chest as he tried to figure out how to make sense of the direction his life had suddenly taken. Tears fell onto the thin vinyl covered mattress, pooling as the staccato visions of the day and evening played before his eyes. He felt the tightness of the dried blood that still clung to his upper body, residue from the violence that had become reality to him, knowing that the majority had been taken with his shirt when he'd arrived. Evidence they had called it. He wanted to wash the horror off but found he didn't have the strength to do so yet. Instead he just lay there, still in shock.

Sam wasn't sure how much time had elapsed when Mr. Crosnah arrived but the corrections officer that had led him to his cell reappeared to take him to his lawyer. Sam was taken to a room with a single table. Along one wall was a mirror. Mr. Crosnah shook his hand as he put a hand on Sam's shoulder. "Sam, are they treating you okay?"

Sam nodded listlessly. He'd met the counselor on several occasions, usually when the man had brought papers to his father to sign for some business situation. He'd always seemed a kind gentleman, each time dressed impeccably in a suit, a pocket watch in his vest. "I guess. I've never been in this situation before." They both sat down at the long table sitting in the middle of the room. Sam took a seat on one side of the table. Mr. Crosnah sat on the other. "They let me use the phone. Afterwards, I guess they were going to ask me questions but when I said I wanted to speak to my lawyer first, they just put me in a room with bars. I've been there ever since." His voice was flat, simply explaining where he'd been.

The lawyer nodded, writing a note on the legal pad he'd brought with him. "That's good, son. I don't want you saying anything without a lawyer you've hired with you." The older man looked at Sam kindly as he led him back into the horror. "Let's talk about what happened, okay?"

Nodding, remembering the conversation he'd had with his father he answered softly, "Yeah."

The counselor took a tape recorder out of his briefcase. Setting it up he said calmly, "Okay, Sam, tell me what happened."

Taking a deep breath, he started his narrative, figuring that going back to the beginning would be best. He recalled his sister's distress about the loss of the teacup and saucer. "Well, Katie had wanted to retrieve Grandma Nettie's china cup that she'd left at her house. I went with her to make sure that nothing happened." He gave a short derisive and bitter laugh. "God, I didn't do that very well at all!" His eyes started to water and he used his hand to brush the tears away. "If not for me Katie would be alive! I should never have taken her there."

The lawyer placed his hand on Sam's shoulder, trying to give him some support. "You don't know that, Sam. Just tell me what happened as you remember it. We'll figure the rest of it out later."

Sam nodded and then took a deep breath, willing the tears away. He tried to pull away from the emotion and continued in an almost detached voice. "He was carrying a gun with him. He pulled it on me, and I think he was planning to injure or even kill me. I think Katie was trying to shield me when the bullet hit her head." Sam stopped talking, as again the vision of what happened played before his eyes. He started shaking and his face contorted with anguish as he became agitated. "Oh, God! Oh God!" his voice cracked. Sam started rocking again as he pressed his fingers into his forehead, his face cradled in his hands. "Her head just exploded! There was nothing left!" He began to cry as he again relived the moment of his sister's death.

The lawyer reached out his hand to Sam's shoulder, again offering what little comfort he could. It took a little time but Sam finally got a handle on his emotions and he went back to stating the facts emotionlessly. "I don't remember what happened next. I just know that what I do remember is coming out of a haze and Chuck was lying on the floor, grabbing at his throat and turning blue."

"Did you do anything to help him?" The man's voice was calm.

Sam's eyes blazed and he lashed out in a louder voice. "Why would I do that? The son-of-a-bitch had just shot my sister! He killed her! Murdered her!"

"I know Sam, but he was still alive. Are you saying that you didn't assist him in any way?" Mr. Crosnah's pen was angled above the yellow pad of paper.

The younger man shook his head. "No, I didn't assist him. I went over to Katie instead. Her body anyway. I just held her until the Sheriff came." This time the tears came in earnest and Sam had no way of stopping them. He just let them track down his face. "I can't believe she's gone," he finished, his voice filled with the sorrow.

The lawyer nodded sadly. "I'm truly sorry that you've had to go through this, Sam," he said as he pulled out a clean handkerchief from his pocket and handed it to the distraught man across from him. Sam accepted the proffered cloth and wiped at his eyes and blew his nose. Meanwhile, Mr. Crosnah made a few notes on the legal pad.

After taking care of the evidence of his distress, Sam asked softly, "Mr. Crosnah? What's going to happen now?" His voice held trepidation.

"Well, Sam, You'll be arraigned and charged in the morning. I've been told they plan to charge you with third degree murder."

"Murder?" He didn't understand. He didn't murder anyone, Chuck did. It didn't make sense.

"Yes," the counselor answered. He explained further. "Murder in the third degree."

"What does that mean?" Sam truly was at a loss.

The lawyer saw the confusion in the younger man's eyes. He explained it fully, watching to see if his charge showed understanding. "Legally, murder means the unlawful killing of a human being with malice of forethought. Third degree means that the killing was done with malice involved but there was not specific intent to kill."

"Oh." Sam thought hard about this. He'd felt animosity towards Chuck Parnell but he hadn't wanted to kill him. He'd just wanted the son of a bitch to leave his sister alone.

Mr. Crosnah looked uncomfortably at the quiet man before him. "Sam, I'm going to help you through the arraignment tomorrow. But I'm in business law and my area is specific to working with farmers. I think you need an attorney that practices criminal law."

Sam's eyes met Doc Crosnah's, his eyebrows going up in surprise. "You've been our lawyer for years. Why do I need another attorney?"

The man nodded. "Yes but I think it would be best for you, Sam. I've got to follow what I think is in your best interests. I have a few contacts in Terre Haute. Do you mind if I contact them on your behalf?"

Sam shrugged. He figured if Mr. Crosnah said he needed someone else, he should listen to him. Still, he was feeling a little bit abandoned. "If you think that would be best."

The lawyer made a few more notes and then turned his attention to his current client. "Sam, I want you to be clear on what I'm going to tell you now. Son, this type of thing can get out of control rather quickly. Under no circumstances are you to talk to law enforcement without your attorney present. Do you understand?"

Sam nodded quickly. "Okay." He again recalled the conversation with his father. He'd said much the same thing.

Tilting his head, he looked directly at the young man. "Do you understand, Sam? I want to hear if you understand what I've just said."

"Yes. I shouldn't talk to any law enforcement without my attorney present," Sam parroted.

Mr. Crosnah smiled. "Good." He turned serious again. "Now your father told me you've already told the police that Chuck shot your sister and that you didn't remember anything else. Have you said anything else?"

Sam thought about it and couldn't remember saying anything else. "I don't think so."

Another note was written on the legal pad. "Is there anything else you'd like me to know? Any questions for me?"

Sam looked over to him, a twinge of longing in his eyes. "When can I see my Mom and Dad?"

The counselor again placed his hand on Sam's shoulder, providing him with human contact, knowing how difficult that this must be for him. "I've told them they shouldn't come down here until the arraignment tomorrow. Hopefully, we'll be able to get you out on bail. This is a first offense and you've never been violent before so I think we can convince the judge you're not a flight risk. If you do get bail, you'll need to stay here in Elk Ridge."

"I wasn't planning on going anywhere else," Sam answered simply.

"Keep it that way." The lawyer began to put the items of his trade back into the briefcase. "Try to get some sleep. You most likely feel that you can't sleep but it would be best if you were rested before the arraignment." Sam nodded. "All right, son. I'll see you tomorrow morning." The lawyer put out his hand. Sam took it and shook it.

Mr. Crosnah called out to the guards and they came to take Sam back to his cell.

Sam tried to sleep but each time he closed his eyes, the horror of his sister's head exploding in front of him came into view. He didn't get any sleep that night and wondered if he ever would again.

The next morning, Sam pulled himself over to the sink in the cell. The bowl was filthy. He washed up as best he could watching the remnants of the night before swirling down the drain. Not having a razor, he was unable to take the stubble off his face, but he did run the bright orange plastic comb that had been provided to him by the corrections officer, through his hair.

He was led into a small sized courtroom. As promised, Mr. Crosnah was there, as were his mother and father. Both of them looked as though they'd had as much sleep the night before as Sam himself. They were given a few minutes to talk before the arraignment began the guard close by but giving the family a semblance of privacy.

His mother took him into her arms. "Sam. It's going to be okay. I know you wouldn't murder anyone, not even Chuck."

"I don't remember much about it, Mom." Tears started gathering in Sam's eyes and he brushed them away. "Mom, I'm so sorry. I tried to protect Katie. I really did. But I failed." His voice broke. "She was trying to protect me, Mom. Chuck was going to shoot me, but Katie stepped in front of me. It happened so fast."

Thelma, crying quietly but openly, took her son's face in her hands. "Sam, we don't blame you for this. Chuck was bad news from the beginning. I'm sure Mr. Crosnah will take care of whatever needs to be done." Thelma kissed his forehead. "Oh, Sam, I'm so sorry."

Sam struggled to pull himself together again for his mother's sake if not for his own. He coughed and then said, "He's suggested that we retain someone who practices criminal law. I told him he could look into that."

Thelma looked shocked. "Criminal law? Sam, you're not a criminal."

A slightly amused grin crossed his face. There was nothing funny about the situation, but the irony wasn't lost on him. "My understanding is we'll need to prove that."

"I thought you were innocent until proven guilty." Confusion lined his mother's face.

Sam nodded. "That's true, but I'm being charged. That means that I'll probably go to trial. At least, that's the way they show it on TV." Sam didn't really understand much about the legal system. It had never been a huge interest of his, although like most people his age, he'd seen a number of shows dealing with the subject including the classic 'Perry Mason.' He just wished his parents didn't have to face any of this.

Mr. Crosnah indicated that the arraignment would be starting soon and asked Sam's parents to take a seat in the gallery. He and Sam took their seats as well. At that moment, the Judge entered the room and the bailiff announced that all should rise, proclaiming that court was now in session, Judge Morton presiding.

After going through some administrative activities the actual arraignment began. The prosecutors stated their position indicating that Sam was being charged with third degree murder. They did not recommend bail due to the seriousness of the crime. Doc Crosnah countered that Sam had never before had any previous offences of any type and was not a flight risk. The judge, after hearing a few more arguments, agreed to allow Sam to be released into his parents' care setting his bail at $10,000. The court date was set for August 26, 1974.

After the proceedings were completed, Sam was lead back to jail to await the posting of his bail, which was accomplished within the hour. Once released, he and his parents met with Doc Crosnah at the house.

"What's next, Doc?" asked John, giving the man his full attention.

"Well, John," the lawyer started, taking a sip of the coffee that Thelma had placed before each person at the table, "the next step is to get Sam a new lawyer."

John looked over at his son. "Sam indicated you wanted him to do that. You've been our lawyer for years, though. I'm not sure I want to change."

The older man took off his glasses and pulled out a clean handkerchief, cleaning them carefully. He put them back on before glancing at each person directly while giving his advice. "I know you trust me and I'm proud to have that trust. It means a lot to me. However, with that trust comes the responsibility to advise you on what's best legally. The situation doesn't look good for Sam. He's admitted he was there when your son-in-law killed Katherine and he was certainly there when the police arrived. His martial arts training is sufficient to show he caused the injuries that lead to Chuck Parnell's death. Finally, the fact that several persons heard Sam all but threaten him a few days before the death could establish malicious intent."

Thelma asked, "Doesn't the fact that Chuck was about to kill him…" She took a deep breath before continuing, "…and then with what happened to Ka..Ka…" she couldn't finish, breaking into tears.

John hugged Thelma to him as she buried her head in his shoulder, weeping. Sam looked on, the look on his face speaking volumes as to how much this situation was affecting him. John looked to the lawyer. "I think what Thelma was getting at is, wouldn't self defense be a factor?"

The counselor answered, "That's why you need a criminal law attorney, John. He can answer that. I can't. I could give my opinion but it wouldn't be worth much in these circumstances." He opened his briefcase. "I've taken the liberty of checking with a few colleagues and I have a several names for you." He handed the paper to Sam. "Son, this is your life we're talking about. You've got to be comfortable with anyone you choose. I've put the names on the page in the order I would recommend them. All of them are good, but Marcus Bennett is, in my opinion and many others, the best choice for you. I've let him and the others know you may be calling."

Sam took the paper and scanned the names. "Thank you."

John nodded, still holding Thelma. "Okay Doc, your point is taken. Thank you for the help you've provided."

Doc nodded. He got up to leave. "I'd like to know when the service will be for Katherine. You know I'll be there."

John nodded his face becoming stoic. "We've set it for this coming Monday."

Mr. Crosnah nodded again. "I am sorry for your loss. Katherine was a fine girl."

John nodded and held Thelma tighter as her sobs became deeper.

Sam got up and walked the man to the door thanking him again for his help and then returned to his parents. His mother had pulled herself together more but it was obvious how deeply the situation affected her. After a short discussion, Sam made the call to Marcus Bennett. He agreed to represent Sam and said he'd be out the next day to speak with them.


	32. June 24, 1974

The Road Not Taken

_Author's Note: I've been promising the last two chapters to some since January. Unfortunately; RL has gotten in the way. Here are the last two chapters of the first book. Hope you enjoy._

Chapter 32

June 24, 1974

In the four years and two months since the funeral of Thomas Beckett, the little town of Elk Ridge, Indiana had undergone significant changes. While once the community had consisted of mostly farmers with a smattering of town folks who ran the local stores, the loss of family farms had changed that.

While Sam's idea to support a farmer's market had helped the local farmer's significantly, those who had kept their farms operational based on taking on more and more debt found themselves unable to maintain this as a sustainable business strategy. Their farms were foreclosed and while many had been able to keep the family homestead, their land had been auctioned off to the highest bidder.

Initially, the people who bought the farms were farmers themselves although often it as the larger outfits. They handled large tracts of farmland, using mechanized farming techniques and utilized the minimum number of personnel to do the work. However, over time, developers, selling the concept of "country living" to the city folk of Terre Haute, had been buying up large tracts of land to build homes on. As a result, a huge influx of people, most of whom wouldn't know a tractor from a combine, were living in Elk Ridge while those for whom farming was their life's blood had hired themselves out as farm labor, had taken on different types of jobs, or had simply moved away.

Thus it was that the funeral for Katie Beckett was not as well attended as her brother's had been. The cadre of friends and neighbors who had offered their sympathies and had been there for the moral support of the Beckett family had grown smaller.

There was another difference in this situation as well, though. Whereas Tom had been given a hero's sendoff the circumstances of Katie's death did not seem as cut and dried for many in the community. Since the facts of her abuse at the hands of her husband were not common knowledge, many felt what Sam Beckett had done was pure and simple murder - a result of bad blood between him and Chuck Parnell.

Never a community of sensational news, the deaths of Chuck and Katie Parnell and the subsequent arrest and arraignment of Katie's brother, Sam, had created quite a buzz, allowing gossip to fly like a 707.

As a result of the various stories and constructions of the events, while many felt that the quiet Sam Beckett who had lived his entire life in Elk Ridge, who had played on the high school basketball team, and who had often played piano at the church or other community events must have a good reason for killing Chuck Parnell, others were not so sure. The Parnell's certainly didn't support that sentiment and they were vocal about their discontent that their son's murderer was out on bail, continuing to live at his parent's house and going on as if nothing had happened. It resulted in the town divided like it had never been before.

The neighbors who believed that there was no way that the gentle soul they knew Sam Beckett to be could ever be guilty of murder, even though several had heard words that could be construed as threatening to Chuck just days before he was killed, were sitting towards the front of the church, surrounding the remaining three Becketts. The others, while wishing to offer their condolences to John and Thelma over what all believed was the tragic loss of their daughter, Katie, sat towards the back, many openly glaring at Sam.

There were a few eulogies pointing out the vibrant and beautiful girl that Katherine Olivia Beckett had been. Her friends, Sarah, Elaine, and Mary Lou had all spoken about how much they would miss Katie. To a stranger coming to this sad event, it would be strange that no-one seemed to speak about the past six months of Katie's life, almost as if she had passed on half a year earlier instead of earlier in the week.

At the gravesite, even fewer persons stood in the bright June sunlight, listening to the pastor's last words over Katie Beckett's coffin before it was lowered into the ground. Sam Beckett had placed a single red rose on the casket and that was the last memory that many had of the ceremony. John had held his wife, distraught over the loss of her only daughter, providing a rock of solid support which she leaned against.

Back at the house, the supportive neighbors stopped by for awhile, making their sympathy for the family known. Those who were not supportive felt that they had done their duty to the family by attending the church service. All neighborly debts had been paid in full.

Sam, the remaining Beckett child, was quiet throughout all the proceedings. Those who knew him well understood this was his way. Sam was shy and generally under spoken. Those who did not know him felt that perhaps he was too quiet - that he certainly should be making noise about his innocence, if he indeed was. Otherwise, his silence seemed to them to confirm his guilt.

Sam had stayed on the main floor of the house for awhile but ultimately found himself in Katie's room, taking in the bits of her life she had left on the walls and shelves. He found a small, cloth-covered book on the desk and opened it, finding in it various poetry which Katie had penned. He hadn't known she was a poet.

He read through her works, amazed at the insights that Katie had made through her short, too-soon-ended life. There were simple poems that she had written, the funny quirky little sister he loved so well coming out in rhyme. There were the poems written in angst, about boy issues or girlfriend thoughts. There were poems that tugged his heart as he saw her fall into a belief that she was lacking as a person, a self-attack on her esteem. And there were poems that she had written alluding to the brutal life the last few months of her life had become. It was these last that filled Sam with shame that he hadn't been there to keep her from making that mistake. He found the last entry, written just days before she died. It was a poem she had written about her brothers. As he read it, tears dripped down his face, tracing salty tracks.

MY BROTHERS

Shy with goofy grin

My brother, Sam

So different from my brother, Tom

Who died in Vietnam.

Tom was like a bear

Strong and ready to defend

While Sam is more

Ideas and gentle thoughts to tend.

I love them both

Though one is in the ground

And the one who's left on earth

My soul he has re-found

For I was lost

Sure there was nothing good in me

Until he stood up and fought

And he has set me free.

Sam lay down on Katie's bed, his body curled into a fetal position and crying into her pillow. The stress of the last few days was finally breaking through. The horror of Katie's last moments, the rage he had felt when her head had exploded onto him, the jail, the initial court, trying not to unduly burden his parents who were also dealing with the pain of Katie's loss, the looks and stares that people gave him. It was too much.

Sam shut down. His tears stopped and he folded into himself. He would learn later that his mother found him like that, non-responsive to her calls, to her touch. They'd called the doctor who suggested that they should have Sam admitted to the psychiatric hospital in Terre Haute. Sam was admitted that night.


	33. October 20, 1974

The Road Not Taken

Chapter 33

October 20, 1974

John Beckett was glad that Sam was being released from the Terre Haute Sanatorium. He had been embarrassed that his son had such a weakness. He'd often thought, as Sam was growing up, there was something odd about him. He loved his child, of course, but Sam just wasn't the same as other children.

Thelma seemed to take it in stride, even seeking out "child development experts" to help Sam develop what she called his gifts. John just didn't understand how a child could read at age two, be able to play piano better than anyone he'd ever heard by age 4, do what was called higher mathematics in his head at age 5, and all the other things Sam did so well. That was all well and good, but life on a farm required more brawn than brain. Not that Sam's brain hadn't been a godsend on several occasions. It had allowed him to save a bit on the cost of feed and seed, or figure out the acreage necessary to optimize his land usage. Sam's ideas had especially benefited both the Beckett family and the community in general when he came up with Farmer's Market concept which had allowed several farms to survive, Sam's family's included.

John was proud of his son for many things. Sam had followed his older son in everything he did. Tom had taken to farming and because Tom did, Sam did as well. Even if Tom did it from the standpoint of practicality, Sam would do the same thing; over and over again until he could do it was well as his big brother. Tom was the person Sam had always strived the hardest to please.

The night Sam had gone to Terre Haute Sanatorium, John hadn't been sure what to think. Sam had always been a quiet, sensitive child from the moment he was born. Tom had screamed like holy hell when the midwife smacked his butt. Sam had taken in his lungful of air, made a few cries of protest about his displacement from his nine-month home and then simply looked. It wasn't a dull look, but was as if there was a fully integrated intelligence in that small body. It had been unnerving. The midwife that had delivered both boys at the farmhouse had said she'd never seen such a thing.

The night of Katie's funeral, though, it was as if Sam's mind had become trapped, become unable to cope with life. It had scared John more than anything he'd had to face before. Having lost two of his three children, he didn't want to lose Sam as well - especially not to a mental hospital.

The past few months, Sam had shown great improvement, coming back to the world, and having his unique personality reassert itself. He'd been meeting with his lawyer, Marcus Bennett, and other experts. It was John's understanding that they wanted to mount a defense based on Sam becoming "temporarily insane." They had used Sam's time at Terre Haute Sanatorium, which had postponed his trial date until after he was released, after he'd started getting better to probe his mind, to figure out the entire story of what had happened.

From what John had gleaned, Sam had been in a state of dissociation and that had led to what the doctor's referred to as a Post Traumatic Stress induced catatonia.

He thought back to the family history and the secret that he'd never told the children or even his wife when they'd asked about the Beckett family line. He recalled the day when he'd found his cousin Randall and his Aunt Mary dead in their house, their throats slashed. His mother had asked him to go over and deliver the pie that she'd made for them. He'd run back home in a panic, telling his mother of what he'd seen. His mother had sent him to his room and had called the sheriff. All John knew after that for certain was his father's cousin, James Beckett, had been found later that day, plowing the acreage furthest from the house. He'd later been found guilty of the murders and had been declared insane. The thought that Sam may be insane as well saddened him greatly. He shook his head.

John looked up the road to the farm knowing that Sam would return home today. His lawyer had gone to Terre Haute Sanatorium to pick him up, planning to spend the drive back to the farm with him regarding the planned defense. Mr. Bennett had called and told them they would be there by 3:00 p.m. It was 2:30 now.

John saw a car driving up the long drive toward the house and recognized it as Mr. Bennett's. As it got closer, he could see his son sitting on the passenger side. The car stopped and Sam opened the door and stepped out. John noticed that his son looked leaner than he'd ever seen him. Sam had never been heavy but now, his clothes seemed to hang on him. It reminded John of the soldiers who were released from P.O.W. camps back when he had fought in WWII. As Sam walked up to him, he saw sadness in his son's eyes that he'd never seen before.

John was cautious as he approached Sam. He certainly didn't want to set him off and have him return to the way they had found him that night. "Hello, Sam."

Sam looked towards his father. "Dad." The word was said with respect and love but also with a bit of trepidation as if he was stepping on eggshells.

"Your mother has lunch waiting," John stated, matter of factly. Then as if to make sure that this was acceptable, asked. "Are you hungry?"

"A little" Sam replied, cautiously.

John nodded. "Well, then. Let's get you into the house." He walked over to take Sam's arm.

Sam waved him off. "I'm okay, Dad. Really." He gave a slight grin, as if trying to convey much more.

John dropped his hands. "All right, Sam. If you say so. You let me know if you need my help though."

The younger man nodded before walking up the steps to the front porch. His mother met him at the door, rushing out and hugging him tightly. Sam hugged her back, then they walked into the house.

John stayed back, turning to the Mr. Bennett. "Did the doctor's give you any instructions? Tell you anything about how we should treat him?"

Marcus Bennett looked over to his client's father, again trying to size up the man. After what Sam had told him, he felt he needed to have this man understand what the reality of his son's position was. "Your son is fine, sir. He's had a rough four months but he is all right now. Just treat him as you always have. That's what he needs most."

John shook his head. "You weren't here that night. I don't want Sam facing anything like that again. I'm afraid that's what will happen if we're not careful."

The lawyer took a breath, considering his words before speaking them. "Sam went through some things that no human being should ever have to face. His mind just protected itself the best way it could, but he's been learning to deal with those memories," Marcus explained. "That's been one positive about the Vietnam War. They've done a lot of research on Post Traumatic Stress Disorders and how the mind reacts to such strong, negative stimuli.

John looked down at the ground, not wanting to ask the question but wanting to know the answer. "Is he crazy?"

"No, Mr. Beckett. He's not crazy." The answer came quickly and was said firmly. "But he was temporarily insane. The doctors all concur on that point."

"Insane." John tried the word out in his mouth. It hurt him deeply to believe his son had crossed that line. His gentle son, the one of his children that most wanted to find comfort in the strong arms of his father until he'd reached an age when he'd pushed away from him, doing his best to stand strong on his own, like his brother. John thought back to that time, right after Sam had started school.

The lawyer again tried to explain. "Temporarily insane. There is a difference. When your daughter's head exploded, Sam's mind couldn't deal with it. He reacted but not with conscious thought. It took a few days before all the things added up but eventually, everything became too much for him. That's why he shut down. It won't happen again."

John didn't feel the lawyer needed to know the Beckett's shameful history and so he claimed, "Well, no Beckett has ever been insane before."

Marcus wanted to shake the man, get him to understand that Sam wasn't insane. Rather, he'd reacted to an insane situation. "Sir, you need to get over that. Pleading temporary insanity is the best defense we can mount. It will keep your son from prison. There is no doubt that he killed your daughter's husband. We won't be able to prove him innocent except by reason of temporary insanity. Anything else will lead to prison for your son. I guarantee you don't want that for him."

John turned to the man, annoyance that the man would say such a thing to him filling his face. "Oh course I don't want that for him!" He took a breath, and then stated quietly and sadly, "But if he has to pay for killing someone, even that sorry son-in-law, then I guess that will be what happens. You just figure out a way to keep Sam from having to pay too high a price. If you'll excuse me?" John turned and left the lawyer standing in the yard, heading up to the house.

Marcus had a sick feeling that this would not work out as well as he had hoped. He'd seen this type of reaction to the idea of temporary insanity before. No one wanted to believe that there could be such a distinction. You were either insane or you weren't. Sam had indicated a fear of this on the way back in the car, telling him that his father would not take kindly to such a defense. His client had asked him to find something else. Something that would allow him to serve the shortest sentence possible. It was amazing how the two men converged on that same point both stubbornly focused on ignoring the reality of the situation.

Well, you could lead a horse to water but you couldn't make him drink. He would try again, of course, but he'd also start seeing what other pleas might be possible. Perhaps, if the Beckett's weren't ready to accept the best situation, they would accept another option. Certainly this man was not guilty of third degree murder. From his point of view, he was truly innocent. He sighed. Sometimes even the innocent had to pay a price.

He turned and walked back to his car. As he pulled away, he saw the farmhouse recede in his rear view mirror.

[END BOOK ONE

_Author's Note: I've started the second book, Metamorphasis. I hope to start posting soon. Thank you for reading… _


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